


make peace with your mistakes and they’ll turn to gold

by deathbysandblk, maybesandsomedays



Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: Alcohol, F/F, Fake Marriage, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Gen, M/M, Married in Vegas AU, Mutual Pining, dubious consent technically since they're drunk when they get married but that's a vegas au for you, slowburn, the Roses all live in NYC in this au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-05
Updated: 2019-11-05
Packaged: 2021-01-23 23:03:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 55,639
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21328141
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deathbysandblk/pseuds/deathbysandblk, https://archiveofourown.org/users/maybesandsomedays/pseuds/maybesandsomedays
Summary: When David Rose and Patrick Brewer meet at a bar in Vegas and get drunk together, little did they know that their lives would change forever.--“It looked like a wedding,” David murmurs and then notices the other man look at him with wide eyes.“Wedding? Why’d you say wedding?” Patrick asks as he whips his head over to look at David—ah yes, that’s his name, he vaguely remembers that.
Relationships: Patrick Brewer/David Rose, Stevie Budd & David Rose, Stevie Budd & Patrick Brewer, Stevie Budd/Original Female Character(s), background Ted/Alexis
Comments: 19
Kudos: 137





	1. Vegas

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! After a little less than 6 months of outlining, planning, writing, and editing, we are happy to present to you what we have been calling “Vegas AU.”
> 
> There are several people we would like to thank for their help on this AU. Firstly, Louis! The playlist would not be nearly as iconic as it is without him! He introduced us to so much new music that’s perfect for this setting and for the vibe of this AU! He also introduced us to the song that the title comes from, “Gold” by EDEN. 
> 
> Next, Mary! She listened to me (Emma) talk about Vegas AU for so long and always answered my questions about if something sounded good or in character or stuff like that. She supported and encouraged me and I could not be more grateful!!!
> 
> I’d also to thank Julia for helping us all the time, especially in the early days of this AU. And thank you for always listening to me rant about how I just wanted to delete everything I wrote and for telling me that maybe I should just get some sleep and not do that ldfjdlskf.
> 
> There is a playlist, which is organized chronologically so that the songs go along with the events of the AU! https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1sJ9PLElny0S6bettzZBJS?si=J7egJBVYTnyrxwjkXn7TCA
> 
> We hope you enjoy and thank you for reading!!! <3

David decides he hates Vegas. Oh sure, it’s all fun and games when all of you agree to go on a big trip with the anticipation being you’ll all stick together, but now that all his friends have ditched him and he’s alone at a bar on his fifth drink of Old Glory, he wishes for nothing more than the warmth and comfort of his own bed back in New York. 

His only saving grace is that at least he doesn’t seem to be doing as poorly as the guy further down the bar from him. He’s been watching him—in as non-creepy of a way as staring at a stranger at a bar can be—and from what he’s seen, the guy is really going through something. He’s been at the bar for at least the whole time David’s been there and he’s slamming back drink after drink. 

He wants to say something—he should say something—but he’s nervous. The last thing this guy probably wants is some other guy lecturing him on how much he should or shouldn’t be drinking. He’s still internally debating with himself when the decision is made for him. The guy catches his eye. 

_ This is it, _ David thinks. _ This is how I die. Staring at a stranger in a bar in Vegas. _

The guy comes closer to him and David spends that time sizing him up. Well, he tells himself that’s what he’s doing—since this guy could totally take him in a fight—but instead what he’s doing is admiring the muscle that he can tell lurks beneath the guy’s blue button-down, showcased by his exposed and sculpted forearms.

David thinks that the guy’s hands look like they know how to throw a punch right at David’s face, but he also can’t help but picture how they’d look wrapped around his cock.

He quickly shakes that thought away. Wow, it has been a while since he’s gotten laid. That’s the only reason he’s having these thoughts, right? That mixed with the fact that he’s imbibed of lots of alcohol in such a short time span.

Patrick thinks at first that he’s just seeing things. The guy sitting further down the bar from him is not staring at him, he’s being paranoid or getting drunken hallucinations. The weirdest part isn’t that he thinks the guy might be staring at him, but rather, the fact that when he looks over, and sees that he is, indeed, staring at him, he gets a little thrill inside. 

_ Where is this coming from? I must be really fucking drunk. _

At first, he just ignores him, not sure what he would do or say if he were to interact anyway. But a few minutes pass, and he keeps stealing glances of the guy stealing glances at him and he stands and approaches him, overcome by a drunken confidence and an overwhelming desire to get to know this man sitting down the bar from him. 

“Are you so drunk you didn’t notice you were staring at me for a long time?”

David squishes back his features in offense. “Um, excuse me, you’re one to talk.”

The guy laughs. “Fair enough. I’m Patrick.”

“David.”

David flags the bartender down for another drink, and Patrick joins him in the gesture.

He sets himself down in the open seat next to David. “Mind if I sit here?” he asks, as he’s already confidently planted his (very nice, David notes) ass in the seat. He smirks at David. “It might make it easier for you to stare at me.”

David does a sharp inhale. “You’re cocky,” he says, narrowing his eyes, and then he tries to backtrack. “Anyway, sorry, I just was wondering if you were okay.”

Patrick’s eyes glint mischievously. “I only share that info with my friends.”

“Well, it seems as if you want to pursue a friendship with the way you proceeded to flop yourself down beside me, but what if I buy you a drink, will that entice you to be friends and spill your secrets?”

“Maybe if I can buy you one, too.”

“Deal,” David agrees just as the bartender shows up.

“Another Old Glory?” the girl, whose name tag reads CASSIE, asks; she knows David’s order by now in the hours he’s been here. He nods.

“Yeah, but I’m buying it for him this time,” Patrick interjects. Cassie’s eyebrow raises suggestively and she suddenly looks intrigued by what’s unfolding in front of her.

“Of course,” she agrees smoothly. “And anything for you?”

“I’ll take a whiskey sour, please.”

Cassie grins and turns to David. “And I take it you’ll be buying that one for him?”

“Mm, yes I will.”

Biting her lip, Cassie nods and turns to her bottles of alcohol. “One second.”

“Does that mean you’re not okay?” David asks, turning his attention back to Patrick.

“How does my choice of drink say that?” Patrick asks, amused.

David shrugs. “You seem like the type of person who drinks hard liquor when they’re upset.”

Patrick is spared from answering by Cassie sliding a drink in front of him, which he takes a sip of.

“What? Are you saying that people who are perfectly okay wouldn’t be drinking this type of alcohol?”

David sighs. He knows what Patrick’s doing. And normally he wouldn’t even think about doing what he is about to do, but something about Patrick makes him think he needs to hear a sob story before sharing his own. Lord knows David’s partaken of enough alcohol to be comfortable with even the thought of sharing.

“I guess it’s not so much only the type that speaks volumes. It’s that, paired with your rapid consumption. But hey, I can’t really talk.” David starts. “I’m here because my friends all decided they could come to Vegas with me on my dime and then ditch me without a second thought.” He shrugs, trying to appear blasé and as if the whole thing is no big deal, purposely ignoring when Patrick gets a look on his face like he’s sorry for him and also ignoring the tug in his gut when he sees it.

David stares at his brightly colored drink instead and takes a sip before resuming the stare. “Truth is, I didn’t even want to come here, not really, but they talked me into it. But hey, something good did come out of it.”

Patrick looks up at him and asks, “Oh yeah? And what’s that?”

“I get to sit here and talk to you.”

David can’t believe he just said that to Patrick, a person he barely knew. He can’t believe he had said any of the things to him he had so far.

What the hell. It’s not like he’d be seeing this guy ever again after tonight. Hell, he most likely won’t even remember this conversation next morning, if he’s lucky.

The smile on Patrick’s face—the first smile David had seen from the man all night—is worth it though, David thinks. He’s amazed at how beautiful a smile Patrick has on his stupid beautiful face. 

“That’s sweet of you to say, David.” 

“Yeah, well, don’t get used to it. Sweet is not exactly on-brand for me.”

“That’s okay. I like salty things too, maybe a little sour.” As he says this, Patrick nudges him with his shoulder, earning a grin from him. “Whatever flavor you are, I like it.”

David thinks Patrick has to be too drunk to notice just how bad that sounds. He wants to laugh, but instead makes it out to be a cough instead, not wanting to hurt his new acquaintance’s feelings. Were they acquaintances? Or have they earned the title of friends by now? David still wasn’t sure, even though they’d agreed that buying each other drinks made them friends. Had they really agreed? Had _ Patrick _agreed?

Patrick sighs and finishes off his drink. “You’re right though. I’m not okay. And before you tell me about how unhealthy it is to be trying to drink my problems away, I know, okay? I don’t need a lecture. Guidance? Clarity? Some goddamn peace of mind? Sure, but not a lecture.”

David lets out a breath he is not aware he’s holding in and says, “I’m the last person on this earth who has any right to lecture anyone about any unhealthy choice they make so have at it. You might regret it in the morning, but, hey, that’s on you.” 

“Thank you,” Patrick says. 

“For what?”

“Being respectful of my decisions. Not a lot of people have been lately.”

“Care to elaborate on that?”

“Do you ever feel like your life isn’t yours, not really?”

David wants to say no, what absurd drunken nonsense is this, but he thinks he gets it. Being the son of a well-known entrepreneur and an actress, always having to follow in their footsteps, not being able to go anywhere without questions, and expectations, and assumptions thrown every which way of who he is and how he should act. Because he’s a Rose. 

“It’s never crossed my mind in so many words, but now that you mention it, yes.”

“It’s bullshit, David,” Patrick bursts out, and then he seems to deflate now that the anger’s out. He sighs.

"I’ve always thought maybe there’s something wrong with me. That I don’t want what’s expected from me, so I must be the problem.” He stops, and David struggles with how to respond, but before he has to, Patrick speaks again.

“But maybe the problem is that society ingrains in us from a very young age a certain timeline by which we are expected to abide and I don’t want to be some fucking puppet with society up my ass.”

The speech sounds like Patrick has been holding it inside for a very long time.

“So society is why you’re here? That’s funny, you don’t strike me as a contrarian, Patrick.” 

“Well, maybe you’re just proving my point then, David. I’m sorry I don’t fit your preconceived notions of what I would be like.” Patrick sighs then and continues, “I’m sorry, David, I know you’re just trying to help. I didn’t mean to get snippy with you.”

“Yes, you were _ very _snippy, but that’s okay. You still haven’t really told me what’s bothering you though and I remember you saying something about wanting guidance, but I don’t know how to help guide you if I still don’t really know what the problem is.”

“Rachel and I have been together for eight years, right?”

“Ah, here we go, here’s the juicy stuff. Hold that thought, I’m gonna get us some more drinks. Cassie, could you please get me a raspberry Cosmopolitan, I’m feeling like changing it up. And he’ll have a whiskey apple pie. Trust me, you’ll like this,” David says, turning and looking at Patrick. “Sorry, now that that’s out of the way, continue.”

“She’s a lovely girl, really. The sweetest person I know. And I do love her, or at least...I’m pretty sure I do.” He exhales again. “I like being around her, that’s love, right?”

He continues on. “But no matter what, there just always seems to be something lacking. It’s not her fault, I think it has to do with me, but everyone’s always asking me ‘when are you two gonna get married? Start a family?’ and those questions fill me with dread every time.

“And not the sort of dread that’s like ‘eh, I hate going to the dentist, but it’s necessary and soon it’ll be over,’ no, a deep sense of dread. It fills me up, overcomes me with a sense that I would be doing myself and Rachel a huge injustice if I were to do any of that. And I shouldn’t marry someone just because that’s what everyone else wants from me.”

“Well, you’re right about that,” David says. “I’ve never even reached the point where I thought marriage was a thing for me, but if I ever do, I need to be sure, you know?” 

“And so that’s where I found myself. Packing for this business trip for a job I don’t really like, in a relationship that’s had more downs than ups lately, and it just came out. That I didn’t want to get married. She told me not to go back. So after this, I don’t really know what’s in store for me, and that should scare me—Patrick ‘always has a plan’ Brewer—but it doesn’t. Why isn’t it scaring me?”

“So, let me make sure I’m hearing this correctly, you’re freaking out because you’re not freaking out more and you think you should be?”

“You think I’m weird, I can see it all over your face.” 

David purses his lips and shakes his head no in a big, wide arc from side to side with his eyes closed. “Mm. No. No, I do not think you’re weird.”

He finishes off the very last of his Old Glory in anticipation of his raspberry Cosmopolitan, and he turns back to Patrick.

“I think you were deeply unhappy, and now you’re not. And now you don’t know what to do about it. But it’s okay to be happy.”

Patrick stares at him, and at that moment Cassie reappears with their new drinks.

“Enjoy,” she says quickly, and David absentmindedly notices how she immediately heads to a girl next to them and seems to stay there, and thinks good for her.

Patrick, meanwhile, is sipping at his new drink of Jack Daniels, apple juice, and grenadine. “You’re right,” he says, bringing David back to his attention. “I do like this. I like apples.”

“That’s good. You know, I had that drink once at a concert in Prague.”

“What’s yours?”

“Um, it is a lot of raspberry.”

Patrick nods. “Raspberry and apple,” he muses.

“I bet those taste nice together,” David blurts out.

Patrick stares at him, wide-eyed.

Next to them, a girl starts cackling.

They both turn to her, and David realizes it’s the same girl that Cassie was talking to, although Cassie is now off attending to other customers. She snorts with the last of her laughter, which sets her off giggling again.

“Sorry,” she says, “but that’s the absolute _ worst _pick-up line I’ve ever heard.” David and Patrick both blink at her. “I’ll give you this, though,” she continues, still laughing and raising her glass out and up above her head in a toast, “at least it was original.” She takes a drink as part of her toast with no one and sets the glass back on the bar.

“I’m sorry, _ who _are you?” David asks.

“Your worst nightmare,” she responds quickly and with a completely straight face, looking David dead in the eyes.

David starts to turn away. “Okay, we’ve had enough of you.”

“I’m Stevie,” the girl says just as he’s turned around.

David turns back. “David,” he offers warily.

“Patrick,” Patrick says, holding his hand for Stevie to shake.

“So are you two gonna keep flirting with each other without letting it go anywhere or is it cool if I join you?” Stevie asks bluntly. David and Patrick both start.

“Ex_cuse _ me?” David cries.

“What?” Patrick chokes out.

Stevie waves her hand dismissively and takes another sip of her drink. “Oh, not like that, I’m not into dudes. Besides, you two obviously have something going here.”

Patrick looks at her, eyes wide, choking on his drink. When he regains his ability to speak, he sputters, “I...what?! Clearly, you have the wrong idea. We, we don’t know each other. I mean, it’s not like that, we just, uhhh—" He trails off awkwardly, taking a sip of his drink to avoid having to finish his sentence.

“Were making googly eyes at each other?” Stevie interrupts, and rolls her eyes. “Yeah, I know, it’s disgusting. I mean, I haven’t flirted _ that _ much with women I’ve actually slept with, and I thought I was gay as you could get.”

Patrick laughs nervously. “Gay? Me? I’m not. Uh.” He pauses, steels himself. “I’m not gay.” His throat closes up and he swallows to try to get it open again.

Stevie raises an eyebrow and looks at him with a slight smirk. “Could’ve fooled me. And him,” she adds, nodding at David.

Patrick stares at her, his breathing deep, and David stares between both of them, and Stevie seems to sense that she’s said something too far, because she abruptly changes the subject.

“So you up for more drinks and some fun? Some scaggy uncle of mine died and left me a ton of money and I intend to use it. And hey! Guess what. I got an in with the bartender!” Stevie opens her mouth wide as though this is an incredulous fact.

“Cassie gets off in ten minutes, and then you should come with us.” Then she smirks. “She’ll also be getting off later tonight if I have any say in it.”

“I don’t know how to respond to that,” David tells her.

Stevie shrugs. “All I’m saying is, stick with me and my girl, and you get the discounts.” She then turns and gives an apologetic look to Cassie who in turn winks at her and blows her a kiss.

***

Patrick’s eyes snap open and immediately he regrets it. The sunshine, although usually a welcome thing, is now his mortal enemy, and he wishes it would just go away. 

_How much I did I have to drink last night? And more important question, where the hell am I? _

He tries, amid his pounding headache, to remember something, anything, from the night before, but he’s having trouble. 

Instead, he focuses on finding out where he is. He looks around, taking his surroundings in. He notices that he’s in a huge suite, definitely not the one his company had arranged for him to stay in, and it’s then that he notices he’s not alone. No, next to him is a man with dark, almost black, hair, curly and ruffled from sleep, who’s not wearing a shirt. Being so close to the man, he gets a whiff of his cologne. 

_The door is barely even closed before David is slamming him into it, kissing him. Patrick’s eyes flutter, relishing in the feel of David’s lips on his own, and then he moves down to his neck, and Patrick gasps._

_They move, David slowly leading him towards the bed, all the while kissing passionately. Patrick’s need to be closer and closer to him growing steadily. As he kisses his neck, he breathes in the intoxicating smell of David’s cologne. _

Patrick blinks and shakes his head slightly at the rush of—memories? Dreams?—that flooded into his head, bringing himself back to reality. To the _ man _in his bed, who has turned his head in his sleep so that Patrick can see his face and who is absolutely, definitely the man he made out with. Possibly. Hopefully?

Patrick’s fingers brush against his lips, as if they’d feel different after kissing a guy and he’d be able to tell by touch. He realizes how casually the thought of him having kissed another guy crosses his mind and does a double take. Clearly, he has a lot to think about, but right now —in this strange environment— with his thoughts all cloudy and his mind all foggy, is not the time nor place.

It bothers him that he remembers so little of what occurred the previous night. Sure, he’d had nights in high school or college where he’d gone out drinking with some buddies. But never before had he let things get so out of hand, never had he allowed himself to lose so much control; and having the now-wicked hangover and only a fragment of the memories of the night before to show for it, he vows to never do so again.

He begins to get himself cleaned up, to try to gain some semblance of normalcy when he notices the two girls tangled up in each other’s arms on the loveseat by the window. 

His first instinct is to yell, having been startled by the two, but luckily he holds it in, stifling the noise in his throat. He doesn’t really feel like making these people he apparently shared a room with overnight his enemies, knowing that they’re probably in a similar state as him.

He racks his brain, desperately wondering if it will helpfully supply him with who these girls are or why they are here, but he comes up empty. It almost hurts his head more—if such a thing is possible—to realize there are even more unanswered questions and unknowns than he had previously thought, and already there had been quite a few.

If he never touches another glass of whiskey again, it’ll be too soon.

He’s startled out of his thoughts by a loud, sudden bang. His head quickly turns toward the source of the noise and he sees that one of the women has fallen on the floor. In a brief moment of panic, he wonders if he should help her up when he notices that both the other woman and the man he woke up next to are starting to stir.

The woman who’s on the floor doesn’t seem affected at all, still fully unconscious, but not for long because the man gets up and almost trips on her, letting out a yelp, and forcing her awake. To her credit, she only lifts her head, scowls, and looks annoyed at having been woken up.

For a moment, the four of them just sit in silence, staring at each other. Patrick wonders if they remember any more about how they got here or what had occurred last night than he does. 

This most certainly is not the first time David has woken up to a room full of strangers and a killer hangover. As to why they are here, or how they got to be here, well, that bit he’s a little more fuzzy on. 

He rules out the possibility of the four of them having been involved in a foursome, noticing that the two girls were tangled up together on the couch after one of them helps the one he almost tripped over back up again. No, the two of them seem more into each other than either himself or the other man.

This thought serves as a reminder to him that he had, in fact, woken up in the middle of the night and discovered the other man sleeping on his chest, but he hadn’t stayed awake long enough after that to take note of much more.

He figures he will just order them all some breakfast and then kindly ask them to fuck off so he can sleep off his hangover. His intention to do that is interrupted, however, by his bare foot touching something rubbery and cold. He bends down to pick it up and sees that it is a popped white balloon.

_They’re all giggling; himself and his three other roommates. They stumbled into what appeared to be a chapel decorated with white balloons and streamers. One of the girls is screaming into her phone. The other girl is filming her and then leans in to kiss her on the cheek._

“It looked like a wedding,” David murmurs and then notices the other man look at him with wide eyes.

“Wedding? Why’d you say wedding?” Patrick asks as he whips his head over to look at David—ah yes, that’s his name, he vaguely remembers that. 

“I think we attended someone’s wedding last night. Or at least, I keep seeing snippets of a chapel and like white balloons? Which is super tacky, but I won’t get into that right now because that’s not what this conversation is about.”

Patrick stares at him, trying hard to conjure up something, anything, from his previously blackout drunk thoughts, but sadly, nothing. He still only remembers making out with David, and he’s sure his face is bright red at the memory. He asks, “Did we know anyone who was getting married?”

The darker-haired woman—who he thinks is named Stevie—crosses her arms at his question and asks sarcastically, “Patrick, I don’t know if you know this, but none of us knew each other mere hours ago so would it have mattered to us?” 

_Ah, his name is Patrick! _ David thinks to himself. _ That’s right! I had forgotten that! _

“Well, it’s just that, how would we have known unless—” Patrick cuts himself off in shock.

“Unless?” Stevie prompts.

“Unless two of us married each other.”

“Why, why would you say that, Patrick?” David asks in a panic.

Patrick doesn’t answer. He’s too busy staring at Cassie and Stevie. “Did you two get married last night?”

Cassie looked freaked a little bit, but Stevie says, deadpan, “Nope. It wasn’t us.”

“How can you be so sure?” Patrick demands.

“Intuition,” she says, in a joking manner. 

Patrick starts to say something about how maybe this isn’t the best time for jokes—especially about this particular topic when all of them are hungover, grumpy, and freaked out—but is interrupted by the sound of a phone going off. At first, there’s just one notification sound, but then it just keeps making noise, and all of them desperately try to figure out whose it is so they can silence it.

The culprit is David and he receives some very dirty looks from Cassie and Stevie. David gasps, drops his phone, and reaches for the remote. He turns on the news and each of them yell at him in protest.

“Turn that down, David!” Cassie yells.

“David, I’m gonna kill you,” Stevie adds.

“David, I’m kind of having a crisis here, is now really the best time for the ne—?” Patrick stops what he’s saying as he notices the top headline on the TV screen, in big, bold letters: **David Rose’s Vegas Wedding?!**

It’s only then that Patrick notices his own phone vibrating on the side table. He reaches for it and he only has to look at the first name—Rachel—before he feels the urge to be violently ill. He rushes into the bathroom and slams the door behind him, barely making it to the toilet in time before all the contents of his stomach are emptied into the toilet bowl.

Once he’s finished vomiting, he slides down on the floor, daring to look at his phone again.

**[From Rachel] **

Hey, I just saw the news. Can we talk, when you get a chance, please?

**[From Mom] **

Patrick, honey, we should talk. Please call me or Dad.

**[From Dad] **

Patrick, we’re worried about you. Please call your mom or me. 

**[From Mom] **

Patrick, I promise we’re not mad at you. We just want to make sure you’re doing okay.

David follows Patrick with his eyes, watching as he goes into the bathroom. 

David tries not to panic. Rather, he tries not to show just how panicked he feels on the outside. Inside, his mind is a swirling mess of trying to figure out what to do in this situation and trying to remember how it had even happened, but on the outside, he wants to seem calm because one of the two of them had to be. 

Who is he kidding? His father’s going to kill him. He can already hear his mother screaming hysterically about how he had ruined their “simULAcrum” and his sister would just laugh and tell some story about how she nearly married someone, but got out of it. No, it’s only him that seems to commit these heinous infractions and pay the price for them.

Stevie has not known David for very long, hell, she hasn’t known any of these people for very long, but she can tell David is about three seconds away from completely losing his shit. Since both of them were freaking out and nothing productive could come from that, she decides the best solution would be for them to divide and conquer. 

She murmurs quietly, “Okay, Cassie, I think this is probably gonna go better if we each take one. I’ll try to calm David down if you make sure Patrick’s okay. He’s been in that bathroom for a _ very _ long time.” Cassie nods and pecks a quick kiss on Stevie’s lips before she hoists herself up to standing with a groan as her head hurts from the shift.

It is bad enough that his family is going to react poorly, but what about Patrick? The thought made him panic even more. Patrick hadn’t even known him for twenty-four hours and now he’s legally attached to him. The poor guy.

_Stevie was teasing Patrick about something and Patrick looked extremely uncomfortable. He stuttered out, “Me, gay? I’m uh, I’m not gay.” _

The brief flash of memory struck him suddenly, making him feel nauseous. He pushed the nausea down, knowing Patrick needed the toilet more than he did at this moment. 

Once he’s sure Cassie has closed the door behind her and Patrick can’t hear him, David says, “I’m freaking out, Stevie.”

David begins pacing back and forth and Stevie just says, calmly, “Don’t freak out, everything is gonna be okay.”

He pauses his pacing to shoot her a death glare. “Easy for you to say! You didn’t drunkenly marry someone. He’s going to resent me, Stevie. He probably already does! You saw how fast he walked to that bathroom!”

“David, you are being ridiculous. That man could never resent you, if the way he looks at you is any indication.”

“Stevie, you have _ no _ idea what you’re talking about! He’s straight. He said so. It’s one of the few things I actually remember from last night.”

Stevie raises her eyebrows at him skeptically and snorts. “Are you sure that’s what he said? He’s about as straight as the rest of us here. He probably ordered a straight liquor.”

“I distinctly remember him saying he’s not gay, Stevie!”

“Oh, do you? Do you distinctly remember that? Because I distinctly remember you being so wasted that you didn’t even remember you got married to him so...”

“Okay, we are not doing this right now! There are more important things to figure out!”

Cassie wiggles the knob on the bathroom door and is relieved to discover Patrick has not locked it. She opens it slowly and sees Patrick lying on his back on the bathroom floor, his phone beside him, and his hands covering his face, his whole body shaking. 

She takes one look at him and calmly says, “Patrick?”

Patrick, not having realized anyone had entered the bathroom with him, removes his hands from his face and tries to hide the fact that he’s shaking.

Cassie sits on the floor beside his feet and says, “Hey, I see what you’re doing and you’re not going to convince me that this isn’t affecting you. You have every right to be freaking out right now. Just tell me how I can help.”

“I don’t know what to do,” Patrick says.

She nods, considering. “A plan, then?”

Patrick’s shaking lessens and he turns his head to look at her. “Yeah. Yeah, I think that would help.”

“Good thing I’m good at planning,” she says, grinning at him. She pulls out her own phone and opens her notes.

She furrows her brow when she discovers there’s a note already open that she doesn’t recognize. She checks when it was made. Last night. Maybe the contents of this will give them at least a little bit of clarity. 

_Do you really believe it we’re going to fucking fucking gathering whatever I can ma people because I’m gay and that gives me the power to marry Gabriel and they’re in love probably so we’re Mary Mary we’re on the way baby you’re hot we should get married too this is David Peace hey what kind of name is face are you dessert or is it because it because your skin self feel they said I am vampire movie you’re vampire you’re Edward Cullen do you sparkle is it because you’re gay okay because I want to fuck you and I’m pretty sure they want to fuck to you that’s what you do when you get married did you know that you and me and that seven severally this is a really great idea I’m glad it is so very friendly_

Looking at this note perplexes her, but also makes her feel sheepish and she tries very quickly to act like nothing’s bothering her, but it’s too late. Patrick realizes something is off about her and asks,

“Cassie? What did you find? Is it about last night?”

“I, uh, It’s nothing.”

“If it’s about last night, I think I have a right to see it!” Patrick insists.

Wordlessly, Cassie hands over her phone and Patrick looks at it. He groans, feeling sick to his stomach again. 

Cassie averts her eyes as he gets sick again and then Patrick’s rambling. 

“How could I have been so stupid? I never drink that much, ever, and now look at what’s happened! This was such a horrible idea! Why were we all on board with this? How did we even get to the chapel? And more importantly, who even marries people who are clearly that wasted?!”

Cassie’s eyes go wide as she witnesses Patrick starting to spiral into another freakout. 

“I’ll be right back, Patrick,” she says, but she doesn’t think he hears her.

“Stevieeeeeeee,” she calls out and Stevie looks at her. 

“What’s the matter?”

“I made things worse.”

“What? What could you have said to him that would have made him feel _ worse _about this situation?”

Like she had done with Patrick, she silently hands over her phone and Stevie looks at it and gasps.

“Why would you show him this?!” Stevie cries.

“I don’t know, I found it and he asked what I was looking at!”

“So you show him a dog picture and save it for later!” Stevie lifts the phone back up to her eye level and glances at it again. “Also, what even is this, exactly? Who wrote this?”

“Looks like voice to text. My mom uses it all the time and with the way she talks it never knows what she’s saying,” David cuts in. “It’s your phone, maybe you said it.”

Cassie shrugs. “I mean, makes sense, I guess.”

“We should probably all look at our phones, there might be more to help us figure out last night,” David says, and then he groans. “Oh, god. Last night.” He puts his hands over his face and falls back onto the bed, flat on his back.

“Try Patrick again, and please don’t show him anything this time,” Stevie pleads.

Cassie walks back into the bathroom. She’s happy to see that Patrick is no longer freaking out and is instead splashing his face with water by the sink. 

“I’m sorry for freaking you out earlier. I shouldn’t have shown you that.”

“I practically made you do it, it’s not your fault, Cass. I’m sorry for freaking out on you.”

“Please don’t apologize. This is a lot. I can’t imagine what you’re going through. But I’m here to help, for real this time. Let’s help make you a plan.”

Cassie and Patrick sat talking through all the things Patrick wants to get done. High on his list is calling his parents, and also, Rachel--although that one he is a little more worried about--but, most of all, he needs to actually sit down and talk with David. His husband. That thought stirs in him a sort of excited nervousness. 

Patrick tries to stand up and Cassie extends a hand, helping him. He feels a bit better now that he’s vomited, but his head is still pounding and the added stress of this whole mess is surely not helping. 

They exit the bathroom together and Patrick looks up, seeing David sitting on the bed with his head in his hands. Patrick sits next to David on the bed and David looks up. The two sit there just looking at each other for a little bit and saying nothing.

Stevie clears her throat and links arms with Cassie.

“Babe, I think maybe we should go try to locate some food while these two talk, okay?”

“Sounds good,” Cassie says, placing a kiss on Stevie’s cheek, and then the two of them left the room. 

The door closes and again, they’re sitting in silence. David clears his throat and tries to speak, but nothing comes out. He starts to apologize, but it seems Patrick has the same plan because as he starts talking, Patrick does as well.

They look at each other and David gestures to him that he can go ahead. 

“So, uh, we got married,” Patrick says as he lets out a small, humorless laugh.

“Yeah, normal people go and take a hundred bad drunk selfies or draw dicks on their faces. Apparently, we get drunk and get married.”

“That’ll teach me to partake of that much in the future. Sure, I drank a lot of whiskey, but I really think it was the apple that did me in. I guess I learned nothing from Snow White.”

His goal in saying that was to get David to laugh, but it didn’t look like David had even heard what he said, he was staring off into space. 

Patrick places his hand on top of David’s which gets David to look back at him.

“I’m sorry, did you say something? I’m just really freaking out here, but I don’t want you to worry about anything, okay? I’ll take care of this. You won’t have to be married to me for very much longer. My dad has really good lawyers. Once I call them and get this situation all cleared up, you’ll be free of me.” 

Patrick opens his mouth to reply, but is interrupted by his phone ringing.

“It’s Rachel. I need to answer this.” 

Patrick stands up, walking into the ensuite living room, and closing the door behind him, before answering the phone.

“Hey, Patrick. I’m sorry if this is a bad time. I can call back later.”

“No, Rach, it’s okay. I’m sorry I didn’t call you, it’s been a busy morning.”

“So, umm, this was it, wasn’t it? Why things never worked between us?”

“Yeah,” Patrick says softly. “Yeah, I think it was. But I swear I didn’t purposefully keep this from you. I just, as strange as it might sound, I didn’t know. Not until…” he trails off.

“Not until you met him? David?”

“Yeah. Rachel, I need you to know that I was not cheating on you. Believe me, I know how this looks, but I was always faithful to you.” 

“Patrick, I would never think that!”

While Patrick is in the other room, David tries very hard to work up the courage to call his father. He knows he needs help, but he is not looking forward to the lecture he will inevitably receive.

He’s about to press call when he hears Patrick insist to someone named Rachel that he was not cheating on her. Hearing it, his stomach sinks down somewhere below the floorboards. He’d already known he really screwed things up for Patrick, but knowing that he had a _ girlfriend _ was worse. He’d not only ruined things for Patrick, but also for this Rachel person.

David hopes to be able to fix things for Patrick right away. God knows he’s the last person anyone should be stuck being married to. He certainly wouldn’t want to be married to himself.

It was just his luck that he would drunkenly marry a straight guy, as if his life needed any added drama. 

David takes a deep breath and presses the number to call his dad. If Patrick is brave enough to take the call from his girlfriend after all of this, he can be brave and just get this call with his dad over with.

“Congratulations, son, I saw the news!” Johnny says immediately when he picks up.

David blinks. “What?”  
  
“You got married!” Johnny exclaims. “I mean, I wish I could’ve been there and thrown you a big wedding, but it’s still exciting!”

“Yeah, David, a shotgun wedding is something _ I _would do,” Alexis throws in, and David thinks she almost sounds impressed.

“Am I on speaker? Who else is there?” After a beat, David adds, “Also, it wasn’t shotgun, Alexis!”  
  
“Of course you are, the whole family’s here! Say hi to your mother.”

“Ugh, God!”

“My own son is _ ma-hahrr-ied _ and we DIDN’T EVEN KNOW ABOUT IT because my chiLDREN DON’T _ TELL ME _ ** _ANYTHING_ ** and now I don’t even know! My own son-in-law! And what kind of a mother _ am _ I?” Moira wails dramatically, and then screeches.

“She’s happy for you,” Johnny clarifies awkwardly to David, and David rolls his eyes at his mother’s antics.

“David! David, you simply _ must _bring this Patronus of yours to meet us!” Moira gasps, much louder this time due to being closer to the phone, and from experience David knows she’s rushed forward and clasped the phone in both hands like it’s a dying lover.

“It’s _ Patrick _,” David corrects.

“Yes, I think that’s a good idea!” Johnny agrees. “Why don’t you bring him to New York?”

“Yeah, I’d actually kind of like to see who would marry you and make sure he doesn’t collect fingernails or only speak in bad movie quotes. I almost married a guy like that once...dodged a bullet with that one,” Alexis throws in.

“Alexis!” Johnny scolds. “We are going to talk about this more later when we are done talking to your brother!” 

“What? I want to meet David’s little Sweetums.”

“It’s _ Patrick_,” David says again exasperatedly. “His name is Patrick, and we had a very long night so we haven’t exactly had a chance to talk about anything yet.”

“Oh! Oooohhh!!” Johnny exclaims, and David inwardly groans in anticipation.

“Oh, my god, no!” David stops him. “We, uh, we met some friends out here so we can’t go to New York.”

“Well, bring them, too, the more the merrier!”

“Wait, how is it that you have at least two friends and a _ husband _ that I didn’t know about?” Alexis asks.

“Contrary to popular belief, I know people outside of you, Alexis!”

“How much did you pay them? Did he ask for extra?”

“Burn in a fire,” David throws at her.

“Kids!” Johnny attempts to create peace. “But that’s perfect, David, I was thinking we can have a big celebration when you get home since we missed your actual wedding.”

“You don’t need to go through so much trouble for me,” David protests. He knows he should tell them right now that the marriage is fake, a sham, an annulment waiting to happen. But he can’t get the words to come out.

“Nonsense, son. We’re happy to celebrate you. We’ll see you when you get home. Bye.” Johnny ends the call after David returns the goodbye, thinking that this is the most celebration he’s ever gotten from his family in his life.

He slips his phone into his pocket, breathing a huge sigh of relief and guilt and god-knows-what-else before once again taking a seat on the bed. Patrick enters a few moments later; David assumes he must have just finished his call too.

Maybe it is a really bad idea to do so, but he takes a few moments to look at Patrick—his _ husband, _as Alexis had just pointed out. He figures he might as well get as much use out of that word as he can because soon he will be divorced, not even getting to enjoy the fruits of marriage for very long. And he only had a husband in the first place through drunkenness; it’s not like he’d ever get one for real. Or a spouse at all for that matter.

Stressed look aside, Patrick really is a very beautiful man. David figures that if they’re technically married, that means he’s allowed to look, at least for now. He’s his husband, after all.

Husband. David rattles the word in his mind. It’s a nice fantasy, even as he knows no one would ever want to call him by that word. Patrick, though, looks like someone’s husband. Like _ Rachel’s _husband, not David’s.

David notices Patrick take a deep breath and then immediately come towards him, taking a seat on the bed beside him. He rests his hand on David’s shoulder and his other hand takes one of David’s in his own. David sucks in a breath, not having expected Patrick to do that.

The hand on his shoulder moves down to the middle of his back and he starts to rub circles, soothing him.

_This isn’t right _ . David thinks. _ I’m the one who should be soothing him, not the other way around. _

"I know we didn’t get to talk much earlier, sorry about that, and even when we did talk, it was about what to do, not so much how we are feeling, so I wanted to ask, how are you holding up?”

Patrick looks so sincere asking that question and he speaks in such a gentle, sweet tone it almost makes David want to cry. Here is a man so clearly stressed out, but did that matter to him? No. Instead he checks in with David to make sure he’s okay. 

David has to look away from him and take a moment to regroup, but soon enough, he’s looking back into Patrick’s eyes. Eyes that a few moments ago had been filled with tension and fear, now full of genuine concern. 

Looking into those eyes, David actually feels like he could cry. Nobody has ever once put him first in weird situations like this one. Not that he’s been in many situations like this one, but people were usually game to take his money and whatever else he could offer them, and then not stick around to help him clean up any messes afterwards.

“I’m sorry,” David says again. “I know this is hard for you, and I promise I’ll get it all fixed soon. You never have to see me again after this, and the media can deal with themselves.”

“David, I don’t know why you are acting like you caused this all by yourself. I got super drunk as well. We both ended up in this situation and we’ll deal with it together, okay? I’m not just gonna leave you in the lurch to deal with everything yourself.”

David has a hard time looking at Patrick as he says this because he just knows if he looks into those sweet brown eyes that he will cry and he can’t cry in front of Patrick right now. How pathetic would that be? 

Instead, he raises a hand to his head, gently massaging his forehead, hoping that will help satiate the persistent headache he just now noticed he has. With the excitement, shock, and adrenaline of this morning’s events, his hangover was cast to the side, but it is back with a vengeance now, making its presence known to David in a big way. 

Patrick seems to notice the way he is rubbing his forehead and quickly gets up, looking around the room for any painkillers they might have. It takes him a minute, but he remembers that he has some in his suitcase. He grabs the bottle and then runs to the sink to get some water for David and brings it back to him. 

David accepts it gratefully, but looks at him in confusion. 

“How are you not dying? I think you had more to drink than me. That’s what I’ve heard anyway.”

“I guess I’ve just had other things on my mind.”

“Marriage stuff? Or other stuff?”

“Well,” Patrick starts, looking down at his shoes, unable to look David in the eyes. “I had kind of a crazy thought. I don’t know if you’ll be on board with it, but it might save us some headaches right away.”

“Oh?” David asks, glancing at him curiously. “Well, color me intrigued.”

“You’re worried about the media affecting your family’s image, right? And I, well, I’m too embarrassed to tell my parents and my ex that this was a drunken mistake, so umm,” he clears his throat and continues, “what if we don’t get divorced right away? What if we pretend this was our intention all along and then get divorced down the line when the attention has died down and we just say it fizzled out?” 

_Ex? _ David attempts to not get too excited upon hearing Patrick’s usage of that one little word. After all, even if the man is single—well, not legally, but still—it doesn’t mean he would want David, but he has to admit the tiniest amount of hope starts to blossom in the pit of his stomach. (He tries to ignore the idea that Rachel may only be a recent _ ex _ because of him.)

“You don’t have to decide right away. In fact, it’s probably better that you sleep on it,” Patrick says, noticing the yawn David tries very hard to conceal. “It’s a big decision and one that’s probably better off being made not hungover.”

Patrick does not have to tell David to get some sleep twice. His exhausted, hungover body is practically begging for him to get some rest. 

“What about you?” David murmurs, already under the covers and half-asleep. 

“I have some work I need to get done.”

“Come on, Patrick, you could use the rest too. It’s like you said, we’re in this together so come sleep with me.”

_Patrick pulled away reluctantly. As much as he wanted to go further, all of this was extremely new to him, and even in his extremely intoxicated state, he knew that his first time being intimate with a man is a memory that should be saved for a time he could remember it better, savor it better._

_He looked at David’s face, seeing his eyebrows furrowed as if to ask him what was wrong without using words, and said, “As much as I would like you to sleep with me, I...I just can’t tonight, okay? We’re too drunk and it’s too important.”_

Patrick bites back a laugh, knowing his incoherent husband would be embarrassed if he had realized what he had just said to him. Sleep does sound very appealing to him and the bed is calling his name, but ultimately what wins him over is the sight of David drifting off so peacefully. It would be just cruel to ignore the pleas of a very sleepy David.

He slides into bed beside him and the last thing he remembers before falling asleep himself is David tugging him just a little bit closer.

***

“How can you be drinking?” Patrick asks, staring at Stevie sipping at the free wine samples they’d been offered at dinner, which everybody else had turned down.

“It’s wine,” Stevie says in a _ well, duh _voice, low and gravelly like her throat is sandpaper.

Patrick blinks at her. “Oh, is it? I hadn’t realized having wine was now considered not drinking.”

“The ancient Romans drank it instead of water,” Stevie protests in an attempt to defend herself.

“Yeah, and?”

“So it’s okay to drink wine,” Stevie explains, leaning forward and brandishing her arm out to illustrate her point. “It’s barely even drinking.”

“Can’t argue with that logic,” Patrick concedes, trying not to laugh. Stevie nods appreciatively and takes another sip of her wine.

David makes a face at her, a grimace, and Stevie turns to him and takes a big swig of her wine.

“What’s the matter, David? Not drinking tonight?”

David scowls and says, sipping at his water, “Electrocute yourself.”

“Don’t tell me what you and Patrick are into.”

Even though he and Patrick had napped for a good chunk of the day, David was still feeling pretty lousy. This was not helped by the fact that Stevie and Cassie had loudly woken them up with Stevie insisting they get out of the hotel suite and go out to eat.

David had really enjoyed the time, as short as it had been, when his three new friends—one being his new husband, but he needed to not dwell on that fact—had not known about who he was, but with the news coverage this morning, if they didn’t know before, they certainly did now.

This is why David’s legs had turned to jelly and his mouth became dry when Stevie had suggested they go out to dinner. They would, of course, expect him to foot the bill. And the friends he had delusionally pretended, and maybe even hoped, liked him just for him would be no more, instead only caring about his money like everyone else.

He was surprised, then, to see her waving around a fat stack of cash. 

“Wear something nice, we’re going to Hugo’s Cellar.”

Patrick quickly slides out of bed and stretches, looking around for something nice to wear. Upon getting a look at his reflection in the mirror, immediately tries to smooth out the piece of hair that was pointed towards the sky. David ignores her completely, opting instead to lay his head back down on the pillow. 

This was, evidently, the wrong move because before he fully knows what’s happening, Stevie and Cassie each grab onto one of his legs, pulling and then dropping him until he had crashed on the ground. 

“We’re leaving in fifteen minutes. Get your shit together. Hugo’s Cellar.”

“Are we supposed to know what that is?”

Stevie rolls her eyes. “I dunno, fancy restaurant. I’d say your kind of thing, but might not be hoity-toity enough for you. No hand-picked caviar from fish who were told they were loved and raised by blind Tibetan silent monks in a magic stream on a mountain.”

“Ha ha. You think you’re funny.”

“Oh, I know I’m funny.”

David knows he should just try to lighten up a bit and enjoy dinner, but his mind is full of thoughts of the events of the past twenty-four hours. Most particularly, he’s thinking about Patrick’s offer for them to stay married.

On one hand, Patrick is right, it would save them a lot of trouble, but on the other hand, David feels nervous at the prospect of Patrick staying married to him when he deserves to be with someone he had fully intended to marry and not just because he was thrown into it. 

David thinks back on Patrick’s words from before they took a nap. _ I’m too embarrassed to tell my parents and my ex that this was a drunken mistake _. Patrick isn’t gay; being married to a man, to himself, embarrasses him and he hates the fact that he put Patrick in this position.

He’s aware that Patrick told him he’s not entirely to blame, but Patrick is being too nice about this. He had thought Patrick was cute, he had allowed himself to flirt with him, thinking he would never see him again, and so it absolutely _ was _ his fault. And he is having a hard time forgiving himself for that.

Patrick notices that David is being awfully quiet at dinner. He wonders if it’s just that he still isn’t feeling well or if something else is going on. Stevie makes one of her typical—well, as typical as he can assume when he has known her for a very short time—teasing comments and David throws one back, but there seems to be an edge to his tone that screams that something is off.

Patrick remembers the proposition he suggested to David before they napped and worries that he had made David uncomfortable. They really needed to talk, but they couldn’t do that with Stevie and Cassie around. Patrick decides he’ll wait for an opportunity to present itself, and soon enough, it does.

They think they’re being slick, Cassie looking at Stevie and signalling with a slight tilt of her head to meet her in the bathroom, but Patrick knows what they are up to. Cassie leaves the table, announcing her sudden and urgent need to pee. Stevie waits not even two minutes before declaring that she also has to pee and scurrying off towards the bathroom herself. 

This works out perfectly for Patrick who turns to David and says, “Hey, about what I said earlier, if I made you uncomfortable, I’m so sorry. That wasn’t my intention. I was just trying to help.”

David visibly startles at this. He starts to shake his head, trying, but failing to get words out. Eventually he manages to spit out, 

“No, you didn’t make me uncomfortable. I just, umm, well, I was worried about you.”

It’s Patrick’s turn to look startled. “Worried about me? Why?”

“Well, it’s just, umm, I’m not exactly the best person to be with image-wise and I wouldn’t want to hold you back from your life, or your ex, or...” David trails off, not able to look Patrick in the eyes.

“Rachel? You’re worried about me and Rachel?”

David nods. “I heard part of your phone call with her. And then you said she was your ex so I was afraid that maybe she broke up with you because of me.”

Patrick starts to shake his head even before David finishes speaking. “No, no, David, you have this all wrong. We broke up before I came here to Las Vegas. That’s why I was at the bar last night.”

_Last night_. The night the two of them got married. With all the drama brought about by waking up and finding himself suddenly married when just yesterday, he had not been—actually meeting and talking to Patrick had escaped his mind. But now that he mentions it, he does vaguely recall a bit of their conversation.

“And as for holding me back from my life? You couldn’t possibly do that. I’m working a boring office job that fulfills me only in the way that it pays the bills.”

Hearing this makes David remember what his dad said, about bringing everyone to New York.

“If we do this, umm, stay married, I mean—which I’m not totally sure of yet by the way—my dad said he wants me to bring you to New York. He, well, my whole family, really, they want to meet you.” David grabs his straw and twirls it around in his glass, looking anywhere but at Patrick, wishing the ground would open and swallow him whole right there.

“New York?”

“Yeah, that’s where I’m from. And I understand if that’s not something you want to do, I mean, like you said, you have a job and everything and it’s not fair of me to ask you to uproot your entire life—”

Patrick thinks about this, weighing it in his mind. He and Rachel are over, she told him not to come back, so he has no place to live. His job is dull and unsatisfying, and he has all the vacation time in the world built up because he hardly ever got sick, never took time off, and worked extra whenever he fancied, especially during the times he and Rachel were going through rough patches.

And Patrick has never been to New York and damn it, he thinks it just might be time for him to live a little.

“I’ll do it. I’ll go. If you’ll have me, that is.” He pauses, taking a second to examine David’s face, which still seems nervous. He takes a deep breath, knowing what he needs to do. “And if you don’t want to stay married, we don’t have to do that. I can still go to New York with you, put up appearances or what have you, and then we can sign divorce papers there, if that’s what you really want.”

Even as the words come out of Patrick’s mouth, he’s hoping David won’t take him up on them. As to why he feels that way, well, that’s something he will have to ponder at a later time. 

David smiles, a tiny half-smile but a smile nevertheless, and says, “Thank you, Patrick.”

It is at this time that Stevie and Cassie return from their tryst, trying and failing to appear nonchalant. They retake their seats and David, appearing to be back to his regular self, asks with false innocence, “Stevie, you seem a little out of breath, what’s wrong? Are you sick?”

Stevie sticks her tongue out at him and David cries, “Eww, no thank you! That’s reserved for your lover!” Stevie responds by waggling her tongue in Cassie’s direction to drive David crazy, as David looks disgusted and Cassie laughs.

Patrick is thrilled to see that the tension in the air has evaporated and everyone seems to be having a good time now. 

He’s excited at the prospect of going to New York with David, even if it’s only for a short time so Patrick can meet the family and then they can meet up with a divorce attorney. But Patrick comes to the conclusion that he’d rather have that little time to get to know David than no time with him at all. He is pulled from his thoughts when he hears David mention New York.

“So, I spoke with my dad today—well, I tried to speak with my dad, but it ended up being my whole family on speaker—but anyway, he told me to bring you all to New York, so Stevie, Cassie, is that something you would be interested in?”

Patrick doesn’t even begin to know how to describe the ache he feels in his stomach at David’s words. It was probably stupid to assume that it would only be himself and David going to New York, but he had kind of hoped it would be.

Stevie’s eyes light up upon hearing David’s question, but Cassie seems more reserved. 

“David, that sounds amazing! When would we leave?” Stevie asks, a little loudly for such a fancy setting. 

“I have my job, I can’t just leave here,” says Cassie quietly, nervously.

David and Patrick try their hardest to engage in their own conversation while Cassie and Stevie whisper with each other out of respect for their privacy.

David bringing up talking to his family makes Patrick feel dreadfully guilty. His parents had sent such sweet, thoughtful texts, and he just hadn’t responded to them. He knew he should call them, but he was terrified of what he would say, of what they would say, or how they might see him differently. 

Here he was, having married a man, and to them, it must look like he had harbored a great secret from them. It occurs to him, now that he's thinking of it, that he had though, without even knowing it himself.

David places a hand on his shoulder and looks at him questioningly.

“Are you alright?”

“Yeah, I’m just thinking about what I’m going to say to my parents. I still need to call them.”

David sees the tense look on Patrick’s face and once again wonders how he could have caused so much trouble for this gorgeous man who did nothing to deserve it. God, David Rose just wreaked havoc wherever he went, didn’t he? He hates the burden his presence has put onto Patrick’s shoulders. 

The arrival of their food couldn’t have come at a better time. It provided a distraction from David’s anxious thoughts, relentlessly swirling around in his head. 

For the most part, it is quiet while they are eating, but at one point during the meal, Stevie and Cassie share a look and Cassie nods at Stevie before she starts to speak.

“So, we’ve reached a solution, David. I will fly out with you and Patrick to New York and Cassie will meet us later, after she gives them some notice. She still has vacation days to use so it won’t be much, but they’ve kinda screwed her anyway so fuck them.” 

“Okay, so then I’m ordering three tickets then? Are we all okay with leaving tomorrow night?”

“Woah, woah, woah, who said you’re ordering the tickets? I can pay for myself and Cassie, David. It’s my scaggy relative’s money anyway. You just have to pay for your husband cause you know, what’s yours is his and all that.”

“You don’t even have to pay for mine, actually, I can get it,” Patrick throws in.

David feels hot tears prick behind his eyes because he’s never had friends before that don’t just expect him to pay for things, but he blinks them back. He allows himself to relax and simply enjoy the rest of his meal with his three new friends.

They finish up their meal, Stevie groaning that she ate too much, and then when the waiter comes by with the check, she reaches for it and immediately pays it, shutting down the rest of their offers to pay their own way. 

Her card returned and the receipt signed, Stevie stands up, Cassie following her lead, and the two of them head towards the door with David and Patrick closely behind them. As they exit the restaurant, they are blindsided by a camera flash and David huffs.

He mutters under his breath, “Of fucking course this is happening.”

The paparazzo steps out in front of them, camera in hand, snapping all the while. He approaches them, shoving a mic in Patrick’s face while asking him multiple questions. 

“What’s it like to be married to David Rose? How did you two meet? What does your family think of the marriage? Are you worried about marrying a notorious playboy?”

Patrick’s eyes widen, not used to having someone snapping photos of him and screaming questions in his face. 

David whispers to him. “You don’t have to say anything. If you do, he’ll probably just ask more. Let’s just call an Uber and try to dodge this guy before heading back to the hotel, okay?”

Patrick nods and says nothing. They keep trying to walk away from the man, but he keeps following them. David whips out his phone and calls them an Uber calmly, having been in this situation many times before. He worries about Patrick being overwhelmed and he’s also hating himself once again for getting Patrick into this mess. 

“Patrick, Patrick, did you take his last name? Did you marry him just for his family’s money?” 

This last question gets Patrick to stop walking and look up at the guy. His face, he’s sure, is bright red and he’s fuming. Anyone who makes a living off harassing people and trying to get a rise out of them disgusts him. The audacity, the sheer nerve of paparazzi.

The guy seems to notice this and once again, shoves his microphone into his face. 

He notices David tense up as he opens his mouth to speak.

“My connection with David was instantaneous,” Patrick starts, wanting to laugh. If only the guy knew how very little Patrick actually remembered of their “instant connection.” He takes a short inhale and tries to veer closer to the truth so he’ll be believable. “We get along really well and it’s like I’ve known him my whole life.”

He notices David staring at him, a mixture of confusion and amazement dawning his face.

“As for your accusations that I married David for his family’s money, I have to say that they are borderline slanderous. I love David and the decision to marry him was the easiest decision I’ve made in my life.” 

David’s mouth drops open, but realizing where he is and that this may appear suspicious, he quickly closes his mouth and tries to regain some semblance of composure. Patrick is good at this. 

David quickly finds that he wants what Patrick is saying to be real. He wishes with all of his heart that it was, a dangerous game to play when every other person he’s ever wished for has abandoned him for someone hotter, someone who doesn’t crave love more than they crave water when they’re thirsty, someone who’s interesting and without a doubt, not David Rose. 

Because he’s been through all this before. It doesn’t matter how much he gives of himself, people never stick around. He could have all the money in the world and it wouldn’t be enough to get people to stay because at the end of the day, he’s still David Rose and all the money in the world isn’t adequate to entice someone to put up with that forever. 

Stevie notices both how Patrick looks like he’s going to choke out the paparazzo and the inner turmoil David’s having, displayed through his facial expressions, and decides to step in. 

Stevie gets right in the guy’s face and starts snapping her own photos with the camera on her phone. 

“How do you like it, Mr. Man? If you want to talk to anyone, you should be talking to me, I’m David’s best friend, after all.”

The man sticks his microphone up to Stevie’s mouth and asks, 

“Were you at the wedding? How was it?”

She leans in conspiratorially, a smirk planted on her face, and says,

“I’ll say this once and once only. My daddy’s a lawyer. If you don’t back the hell away from us, I’ll have your ass sued faster than you can say ‘polly want a cracker.’ I have all the photographic proof I need of your harassment. Now scram, sicko!”

The guy glares at her, but runs away nevertheless and David looks at Stevie in amazement.

“Stevie, I have never seen someone give up so easily like that! That was incredible! Also, your dad’s a lawyer?”

“Nope,” she says delightedly. “I made all that shit up. I never knew my dad, but from what I heard, he was an ass.”

“You should be an actress, babe! You’d be a star,” Cassie says, leaning in to kiss her.

Stevie kisses her back enthusiastically and then turns to look at Patrick who still hasn’t said anything since she chased the guy off. 

He’s shaking, but not from nerves. From anger. It’s a look she knows all too well, being a person who’s dealt with a lot of anger herself. 

She makes eye contact with David and gestures with her eyes that he should do something. It’s strange how in such a short time, they speak a language with each other, through gestures and movements, only understood by the other.

David blinks frantically, asking her what he should do, and she raises her eyebrows and tilts her head subtly towards him.

David clears his throat and puts his arm around Patrick, pulling him in closer in a sort of awkward side-hug he’s sure Stevie will give him shit for later, but it seems to help calm Patrick down as he visibly relaxes, taking a deep breath.

“That was amazing, what you did there.”

“I’m sorry, David.”

“For what?” David looks at him, confused. Here it is, the part where he rescinds everything he just said and tells David his life had been better without him in it. 

“I know you told me not to say anything, but he just got to me.”

David sighs, hoping Patrick is too distracted to see how relieved what he has just told him makes him feel. He rubs his back and says gently, “They have a tendency to do that and this is all very new for you. I’m not upset with you, not at all.”

Patrick smiles at him and opens his mouth to say something when Stevie interrupts, “Is that our Uber?”

David pulls away from him to walk towards the vehicle and Patrick shivers at the absence of his touch. It was a chilly night after all, which was definitely why he had shivered.

Because there are four of them, one person has to sit up front while the other three pile into the back. Patrick can see just how much the thought of him having to sit up front disturbs David so he offers to sit there, not wanting to split Stevie and Cassie up, who are busy staring lovingly into each other’s eyes. 

Things are so simple for them, so effortless, Patrick thinks. They met the same night he and David did, but Patrick has to admit how envious he is of them. They don’t have to worry about paparazzi or meeting each other’s families right away. This thought makes his stomach turn. Oh yeah; he would be meeting the Roses tomorrow.

***

They get back to the suite and immediately Stevie and Cassie start packing up the small amount of things they have. David looks at them and shakes his head, demonstrating just how confused their actions are making him.

“Where are you going? We aren’t leaving until tomorrow night.”

“Oh yeah, we know,” Stevie replies. “But I have a room at this hotel too, David, and me and my girl need to get some good use out of it, if you know what I mean.”

David gawks at them and Stevie says, “For sex. We’re gonna have sex. We figured that’d be something we’d be better off going to our own room for.”

"Oh MY GOD,” David says. “I know what you meant!! Go, go already!” using his arms to shoo them from the room. 

Before leaving the room, Stevie gets close to him and whispers, “Maybe you ought to follow our lead. You know, in your marriage bed and all.” She winks and then skips away happily.

He really hopes Patrick didn’t hear what Stevie whispered to him.

It’s quiet in the room now that Stevie and Cassie have left, both men lost in their own thoughts. 

Patrick breaks the silence and says, “Well, we have a busy day ahead of us tomorrow, should we try to get some sleep?”

David nods and heads for the bed when he sees Patrick heading for the couch.

“What are you doing?”

“I’m getting ready to sleep...didn’t we just talk about this?”

“No, I mean like why are you getting on the couch.”

“I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable or anything so I just thought I’d sleep over here.”

David begins shaking his head wildly in the way that Patrick has noticed he does when he can’t even begin to express how wrong he thinks something is. Patrick finds it to be exceedingly adorable. 

“Patrick, you’re my husband, drunken mistake or otherwise, you shouldn’t have to do that.”

“David, it’s fine. No one’s forcing me into this.”

David looks at him and says, “If that’s what you’d prefer then by all means, stay there, but I just need you to know that it wouldn’t bother me if you slept in this bed with me. I mean, it’s not like we haven’t done it before.”

He winces, Stevie’s words coming back to him, and realizing how that sounds.

“Slept in the same bed together, I mean,” he blurts out and then, because he talks a lot when he’s nervous, he continues, “That couch would probably not be comfortable anyway and—”

Patrick grins at him and says, “Well, since you _ insist_.”

David stares at him, mouth agape, and Patrick giggles, “I’m kidding, David. Thank you.”

“Well, luckily for you, I have a very giving nature.”

“Oh yes, I’m very aware,” Patrick returns and David could melt right there into a puddle.

Patrick turns out the lights and then joins David, who had already gotten into the bed. 

“Good night, David,” he whispers.

“Good night, Patrick.”

It’s silent for a while and Patrick assumes David has drifted off to sleep. He wishes he could, but he is having trouble doing so. No, instead his brain is full of thoughts he’s tried so hard to push down. Specifically, he’s thinking about the memory of him making out with David that pops up into his head more often than he would like to admit.

He’s replaying it over and over in his head when he hears David speak up.

“Patrick?” he whispers. “Are you still awake?”

“Yeah, is something wrong?”

“No, I just can’t sleep. What about you? Are you okay?”

“I’m fine, just thinking.”

“What are you thinking about?”

Patrick cannot possibly be more grateful that the lights were off and David can’t see his face. He feels guilty for thinking about making out with David so much for a couple of reasons. First of all, he doesn’t even know if David remembers that that happened and secondly, David isn’t his actual husband. Most likely, they’d be heading to New York to get those divorce papers signed and then Patrick would be off doing well, he’s unsure of what’s next in store for him, but he’ll figure it out. 

That thought saddens him and he realizes he’s taking a really long time to answer David. He quickly tries to think of something he can say that would sound plausible and he settles for an earlier thought he had had.

“I’m a little nervous about meeting your parents.”

“Really? You hide it well. I would have never guessed. You shouldn’t be nervous though, they’ll love you, probably more than they love me.”

“Why do you say that, David?”

David sighs. “It’s not that I think they don’t love me, it’s just, well, we’re not exactly the closest family. Sorry, I didn’t mean to make this about me. We were talking about your anxiety.”

“It’s okay, talking helps me not think about it. Talk more? Please?”

His polite request makes David feel so much for the other man. Not only has Patrick asked him to keep talking—something no one has ever asked of him—but he said that David was helping him by talking. It’s a nice feeling, feeling wanted, needed. Something he wants more and more of, he could get addicted to this feeling.

David laughs. “What do you want me to talk about?”

“Anything. Everything. I just want to hear you talk.”

If David wasn’t falling for this man before—he definitely wasn’t, thank you—he was now and he takes a deep breath to calm himself down and force that thought from his mind entirely.

David struggles to come up with something to talk about that doesn’t have anything to do with things he doesn’t want Patrick to know about himself—most of his exploits involving drugs, exes, etc—or things that had been on his mind—how much he really wants to kiss Patrick or how he’s starting to make him feel. He settles on warning Patrick about how his family will probably act when they meet him.

“I feel I should give you a heads up that when my sister meets you, she will most likely flirt with you. She’s just a naturally flirty person, but she means no harm by it. And my dad will probably talk your ears off about the business. And my mom has a flair for the dramatic. She tends to scream or talk very loudly at intermittent times.”

“Can I be honest? I think I’m most intimidated at the prospect of your sister flirting with me.”

David guffaws, a sound Patrick had yet to hear from him, and it’s the most delightful sound he’s ever heard. The bed shifts a bit and Patrick has no doubt David clapped a hand over his mouth as if that would take back the sound that escapes his mouth. 

“Why do you say that?”

"Well, I’m a business major so the business talk will probably be super interesting to me and within the past twenty-four hours, I woke up married to a very dramatic man, so I think I can handle drama.”

“Name one time I’ve been dramatic!”

“David, you freaked out when you thought a bird that wasn’t even anywhere near you was going to swoop down and peck you on the way to the restaurant earlier.”

“I have a thing about flying creatures.”

“Well, I promise to protect you from all flying creatures.”

“I don’t remember that in our vows,” David chortles.

“Try remembering harder, I think it was definitely there.”

“I wasn’t aware you remembered.”

“I don’t. So maybe we’ll have to redo it.”

David’s heart lurches in seven different directions.

“All for the purpose of flying creature protection, of course,” Patrick adds, grinning.

“It’s more important than you think,” David agrees, smiling back so wide his face hurts.

There’s silence for a while, long enough to have Patrick thinking that maybe David drifted off to sleep, but then he asks, “Can I ask you something?”

“Of course, David. You can ask me anything.”

He wants to ask why Patrick would be willing to put up with him for longer than necessary, he wants to ask Patrick to kiss him and hold him and never let go, he wants to ask Patrick a whole slew of questions that would most likely be off putting or scare him away.

So instead he asks, “Do you have any fears?”

Patrick blinks, not expecting this question out of all the possible ones he had conjured up in his head.

“Yes, of course.”

“If you don’t mind, can you share one with me? I feel it’s only fair because I told you about my thing with flying creatures.”

Patrick takes a while, pondering which fear of his he feels comfortable confiding.

“I’m always afraid of people misinterpreting my intentions. It’s why I got so mad at that guy earlier. Do you really go through stuff like that all the time?”

“Yeah, but it becomes easier and easier to ignore the more you deal with it.”

“You shouldn’t have to deal with it at all! People shouldn’t be able to get away with that!”

“While I admire your concern, Patrick, it’s really okay. They’re just trying to make a living.”

“Well, I make a living too, and I somehow managed to choose a career that doesn’t involve harassing people. How are you so calm about this?”

“I’ve been in the spotlight since I was a little kid. With my mother the soap star and my father the up-and-coming businessman turned entrepreneurial genius, it was kind of unavoidable. It’s all I’ve known, really.”

Patrick catches a hint of sadness in the last thing David says, but doesn’t comment on it, knowing how hard David was probably trying to make sure it didn’t show through.

He leans in closer to David and his hand brushes against David’s hand which is placed on the bed. Patrick grabs David’s hand in his own and squeezes it, presuming this less direct approach to acknowledging David’s gloom will be more comforting to him than any words he could say. 

It grows quiet between them again and Patrick feels that David is asleep before he hears it, David’s head having fallen onto his shoulder. Patrick can hear soft snores and he’s scared to move even a fraction for fear of startling David awake. He’s glad David is getting some rest. It’s been a long day for the both of them, and if David was as exhausted as he feels— even with the nap from earlier— he deserves to get some rest.

As much as Patrick’s body is craving sleep, his mind is wandering a mile a minute. He needs to call his parents. He just doesn’t know what to say to them —a fear he was too afraid to admit to David. It’s sad, but being right here, in Las Vegas, in this hotel suite, with David feels more right than any singular moment of his eight years with Rachel and the realization astounds him. 

_Holy shit, _ he thinks. _ I’m really fucking gay. _This realization—brought upon by the fact that he’s starting to catch feelings for his fake-but-technically-real-husband—makes for a very complicated situation.

He needs a drink. _ No_, he lectures himself, _you do not! This is how you got in this situation in the first place_, not that he really has any complaints. Except for the fact that he had proposed they stay married and David Rose had not given him an answer yet.

He’d accept and respect a no, as painful as that might be, but he’s really hoping for a yes. He’s hopeful in a way he’s never ever been before. It’s terrifying, yet thrilling.

***

The next thing Patrick knows, the alarm on his phone that he forgot to turn off is blaring and David is grumbling beside him. When had he fallen asleep? He doesn’t remember doing that. 

It had been a fitful sleep, and all Patrick wants to do is close his eyes again and cuddle up next to David. 

This thought forces him to open his eyes and look at the man sprawled out all over, his head resting on Patrick’s chest and his legs tangled with Patrick’s. Immediately, he remembers the realization he started to come to the night before and he tries not to panic.

He still feels awful and a bit hungover. Either he drank too much the other night or he’s starting to not be able to handle his liquor like he could when he was in college. He closes his eyes again, knowing deep down that he needs to get up and start getting ready to leave town and that closing his eyes without setting his alarm is a dangerous game, but he can’t bring himself to care. He’s too tired and too comfortable lying here with David.

Life has other plans for him evidently because just as he starts to drift back to sleep, there’s a knock on the door. 

David sits up quickly, his arm whacking Patrick in the face. Patrick winces and David turns to look at him. 

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry. The knock startled me, but I didn’t mean to hit you. Are you okay?”

“ ’m fine,” Patrick murmurs, still trying to fully wake up. 

David goes to open the door and Patrick flops back onto the bed. He’s entirely too exhausted to deal with whomever it is.

He doesn’t hear what the person on the other end of the door says, but he’s pretty sure he knows who it is based on David saying, “It’s a little early, don’t you think?”

“Good morning to you, too, my darling friend! And such a lovely morning it is too!” says Stevie who waltzes in and starts to open up the curtains, the bright light shining right in Patrick’s face.

Cassie, of course, is right behind her, and she shoots Patrick an apologetic glance, but then seeing the red mark on Patrick’s face, she asks,

“Patrick, are you okay?”

“Hmm? Oh yeah, when you guys knocked, it startled David and he accidentally nudged me in the face. It hurt at first, but honestly, it probably looks worse than it is.” 

“Let me get you some ice,” Cassie insists and Patrick begs her to let it go, but she refuses.

David hops up, going with her, feeling extremely guilty to have hurt Patrick. 

This leaves Stevie and Patrick in the room. Stevie sits down in front of Patrick on the bed, where Patrick was still lying down. 

“You look like hell,” she says.

“Didn’t sleep well,” Patrick replies, not even able to muster up the energy to retort back.

“Does David snore or something?”

“No, it doesn’t have anything to do with David’s sleeping habits.”

Stevie’s eyes lit up. “But it does have to do with David, doesn’t it?” She slaps his arm and says, “Spill!”

“Ow,” Patrick says pointedly and Stevie shoots him a sheepish grin before saying, “Seriously, Patrick, tell me everything!”

It is so weird how it really feels like Patrick has known Cassie, Stevie, and David forever, even though they only met two nights ago. He wants to tell Stevie, but he’s also nervous to do so, knowing that his thoughts on the subject aren’t fully formed.

Stevie’s simply looking at him the whole time while he’s having this inner turmoil until she finally says, point blank, “You like David.”

“Wh-what?! Why would you say that?”

“Just look at you! You’re so quick to try to deny it, why is that, Patrick? He’s your husband, after all.”

“He doesn’t want to be,” Patrick says, without thinking.

“What do you mean by that?”

At this point, his face is so red, and he opens his mouth to laugh it off when he’s saved from having to answer by Cassie and David re-entering the room. 

“This isn’t over,” Stevie whispers and then hops off the bed.

Cassie starts to put the ice to Patrick’s face, but Stevie says, 

“Babe, I think you should make David do that. It’s his fault Patrick’s hurt, after all.” 

If it’s possible for it to do so, Patrick is sure his face becomes even redder at Stevie’s outburst.

David sits in front of him and he’s sure he can hear just how fast his heart is beating. He gently places the ice wrapped in a paper towel to Patrick’s face and just holds it there. Their faces are so close and Patrick thinks about how easy it would be to just lean in and kiss him. 

_This is really not the best time for such thoughts, Patrick, _ he lectures himself. 

It starts to become too much and he grabs the ice, his own hand brushing against David’s and he says,

“I’m sure your arm is getting tired. You don’t have to do this. I’ve got it.”

“Are you sure? I swear I didn’t mean to—”

“David, of course you didn’t. It’s really okay. I promise,” Patrick reassures him. 

David nods and then turns to the girls, who had taken a seat on the couch.

“So, what, you woke us up early and you didn’t even bring breakfast?!”

“Well, Mr. Grumpy Pants, that’s why we woke you up. We thought maybe we could talk about plans for the day before we leave, and order some room service.”

“Now we’re talking,” David says, grinning.

“I need to take a shower,” Patrick exclaims and gets out of the bed, heading for the bathroom.

“What do you want to eat, Patrick?” Cassie asks him.

“What? Oh, I don’t care. Anything is fine,” he replies before he enters the bathroom, closing the door behind him.

“Is he okay?” David asks, looking at the closed door. He had followed Patrick with his eyes. He doesn’t look so good.

David takes a seat on the edge of the bed.

“He told me he’s really tired,” says Stevie, shrugging. “I think he might still be a little hungover too. His eyes looked really bloodshot.”

“Well, with how much he drank Friday night and how little he’s slept in the past thirty-six hours, that would make sense,” Cassie says.

David and Stevie both stare at her and she asks, “What? I’m a nurse-in-training. I’ve been taking online courses. I only work at the bar to pay for school.”

“How old _ are _ you?” David asks and Stevie smacks him in the arm.

“Sorry, let me rephrase. You seem like you’re around our age and we’re a little above school age.”

Cassie laughs. “It’s okay, David, I’m not offended. I didn’t immediately go to college after high school because I didn’t really know what I wanted to do, but about a year ago, I decided I really wanted to pursue nursing so that’s what I’m doing now!”

Stevie leans in for a peck and David pulls out a menu so they can start figuring out what to eat. 

“He’s gonna be okay though, right?” David asks, after they ordered their breakfast.

“Oh yeah, he’ll be fine. Hangovers vary from person-to-person and some unfortunate people get really killer ones that can last for days sometimes. He should probably try to take it easy today before your flight tonight.”

David nods, still looking nervous.

“David, I promise, he’s gonna be just fine. I wouldn’t lie to you, okay?”

David wants to believe her, but he couldn’t even begin to count how many people had told him the same thing, only for them to turn around and do exactly that, or cheat, or steal from him, etc. 

“He’s hungover, David, not dying,” Stevie chimes in, unhelpfully.

David glares at her and Cassie puts her hand on Stevie’s shoulder.

“Babe, maybe you should lay off him. He’s had a stressful couple of days.”

“Fine,” Stevie says and this surprises David. She doesn’t seem the type to give in so easily, but maybe that’s what being in love does to people.

He hates to admit it, even to himself, and he will deny it if anyone were to ask him about it, but Stevie and Cassie really are sweet together. They’re the kind of couple that David’s always admired: a perfect balance of sassy and sweet. 

_Patrick is sweet _, his brain unhelpfully supplies. 

There’s a knock at the door then and David jumps up. “I’ll get it!”

Once he tips the staff member, he rolls the food cart in between the couch and the bed so each of them are within reach of the food. They start digging in just as Patrick pads back into the room in only a towel.

David had picked up a piece of toast and was about to take a bite when Patrick walks in, wearing only a towel around his waist; David pauses, staring at Patrick, his hand hovering mid-air in front of his mouth, which was wide open. He quickly recovers and takes a bite. 

“I’m so sorry I’m coming in here like this,” Patrick apologizes. “I stupidly went in there without some different clothes to wear.”

“Oh, don’t worry,” says Stevie. “Cassie and I aren’t even looking and David’s busy enjoying,” she pauses dramatically, “….his toast.” 

David glances over at her menacingly and she just smirks at him, winks, and then takes a bite of her breakfast. 

Patrick grabs his clothes and then exits the room again and Stevie opens her mouth, but David holds up his hand to her. “Not a word, Stevie!”

Even Cassie, the definite nicer one of the pair, is smirking, and David feels very ganged up on.

“It’s a good thing he’s so out of it today, David,” Cassie giggles, “because you couldn’t have been any less subtle.”

“OH-_KAY _,” David cries out. “What happened to laying off me?!”

“I’m sorry, David,” Cassie says innocently, “you just make it too easy to not lay off you.” 

“Don’t apologize to him. You know he secretly loves it.”

David huffs, refusing to admit she’s right and hating but also loving that she seems to see right through him already, and then the three of them eat in silence for a bit. Patrick re-enters the room, fully dressed this time, and takes a seat beside David on the bed. He reaches for some food and starts eating ravenously. 

“Feeling better?” Cassie asks him.

“A bit,” he answers, in between bites.

“Good, I’m glad. Do you all mind if I turn to the weather channel? I want to see what the forecast is for tonight. I heard it’s supposed to storm and that would not be good for your flight.”

“Go ahead,” says David, and Patrick and Stevie both nod in agreement. 

Cassie turns on the TV and is about to switch the channel when Stevie stops her. 

“Unbelievable!” she yells. “This is probably the work of that asshole from last night!”

“This” turns out to be a story about how David and his husband were not wearing wedding bands when spotted leaving dinner last night. The commentators are debating if this already spells trouble for the oldest Rose child’s marriage or not. 

The people arguing against there being a problem cite Patrick’s words from last night as their proof.

“Does that sound like something someone would say if they were split from their partner?”

“It does if they’re putting on an act and trying to make it seem like nothing’s wrong,” a person from the other side of the debate chimes in.

“Ugh, please shut this off,” David implores and Cassie does as he requested.

“We’re literally going to see my parents tonight! We can’t show up without rings! They’ll be so suspicious!”

A quick google search tells them that Del Prado Jewelers is pretty close to their hotel so once they finish up their breakfast, David and Patrick part ways with Stevie and head that way to pick out rings for each other. 

They walk inside and an employee named Rebecca greets them right away. She asks what she can do for them and Patrick says, “This might be an unusual request, but my husband and I recently got married, but we still want to pick out rings for each other. We’re just kinda doing it in a different order,” he chuckles awkwardly and Rebecca smiles at him. 

“That’s not unusual at all! I can help you with that! Did you have any particular styles in mind?”

"Can we confer a minute, Rebecca?”

“Of course, just let me know when you’re ready!”

Patrick turns to David and says, “How do you want to do this? Should we just pick out our own or?”

“How about we pick out each other’s?”

“It would certainly make for a cute story,” Patrick says, smiling. 

“That it would.”

Patrick calls Rebecca over and tells her the plan. Rebecca pulls out the ring sizer and helps both of them figure out which size of ring the other is. After that is all figured out, Rebecca then gets a coworker to help David while she helps Patrick.

“You two make a cute couple. How long have you been together?”

“Not very long, actually. Some might say we rushed into our marriage, but we don’t care what they think.”

Patrick realizes this isn’t an exact truth, but he would probably have to get used to those since the two of them didn’t exactly want to go around proclaiming that they were practical strangers who had a few too many and ended up hitched. 

“Well, that’s a good attitude to have, honestly. As long as you two are happy, that’s all that should matter!”

As they are talking, Rebecca shows him a variety of styles of rings. It’s honestly overwhelming. He knows enough about David in the short amount of time they’ve been acquainted to know that picking out a ring for him would not and should not be something he half-asses. 

Looking over all of his options, he sees a gold ring similar to the silver ones he noticed David wearing one of the many times his attention was drawn to his hands while he was gesticulating. Suddenly, he knows exactly what he wants David to wear on his left hand.

“Rebecca, that one there,” he says, pointing to the gold ring and lowering his voice on the off chance David could hear him. “Is there any way you have four of those in stock? David wears four silver ones on his hand that look just like that one and so I want those to be his wedding rings.”

“Awww, that’s so thoughtful of you! I’m sure he’ll love them! I can check for you, but I kinda doubt it, to be honest. We can always special order them for you if you would want.”

“Yeah if you would check, that would be great. We’re not from around here, and it’s kind of a weird story, but we’re actually headed to his parents’ house in New York and I’ve never met them and I don’t really know the address.”

Rebecca nods and goes to check for him. She returns shortly and says, apologetically, “I’m sorry, unfortunately, we don’t have four of those in his size. We just have one, but we could special order the other three or get them resized, but it would take a few weeks.”

Patrick nods, thinking it over, and then decides. “Yeah, I think I will take this one and then order the others to his parent’s house. I’ll just have to get creative with how to procure that information.”

“You said he’s from New York, right? We could just ship them to our location there. Where in New York, do you know?”

“Upper East Side, I think.”

“Okay, it won’t be too far of a journey for you then! Ours is in Midtown,” she says. “This way, the other three can be a surprise.”

David comes up beside him as Rebecca is ringing him up.

“Hey, no peeking! I didn’t come up to try to get a sneak preview when you were finishing up so why don’t you just wait over there?”

David pouts, but Patrick puts his hands on his shoulders and whispers, “I’m almost done, okay? So if you wait over there, you can pick wherever we go to lunch.”

David seems content with this answer and waits by the door as requested.

Pretty soon, Patrick is ready to go as well and as they are leaving, he asks David, “So, what did you decide on?”

“There’s a pizzeria near here called Evel Pie, but based on the description, it is _not_ aesthetically on brand for me.”

“Oh, right. There’s nothing worse than that,” Patrick says teasingly. 

“It’s very important, Patrick!”

“Okay, okay, well then what do you want?”

“I really wanted pizza though!”

“Well, do you think you’ll live if we enter Evel Pie or will you drop dead from the sheer horror?” 

“Unclear, unclear if I will live.”

“You can do this, David. I’ll be with you every step of the way.”

David rolls his eyes, but works very hard to conceal the smile that’s threatening to show. 

Despite his objections to the decor and overall feel of the place, the pizza turns out to be good enough to have made it worth it. After lunch, on their way back to their hotel, they spot a Walgreens and Patrick says, “I need to grab something for the flight, can we stop in here for a second?”

Patrick grabs sunflower seeds for his snack and David grabs a ton of candy, insisting Patrick’s choice of snacks for the flight is _ incorrect. _ Patrick just smiles fondly at David and tells him to put the candy with his item and David lights up.

They get back to the hotel and start gathering their things so they can pack. Cassie had offered to drive them all to the airport since she’s staying behind for about a week.

Stevie and Cassie had gone back to their room and once again, David and Patrick were alone. 

Patrick notices David looking at him excitedly and he asks, “What’s going on?”

“Can I show you the ring I got you now?”

“Oh yeah, we can exchange rings now, that’s fine.”

“Patrick, try to have a little more enthusiasm about this then just it being ‘fine’!”

“Sorry, sorry, yes, David, let’s exchange rings now!” Patrick says in an overly-excited tone. 

“I know you’re making fun of me, but that’s still more like it! I’m just really excited to show you yours! I love shopping!”

David hands him a ring box and he opens it. Inside is a silver ring made of tungsten with a strip of sapphire down the center, and Patrick has to admit, it’s perfect. He’s never really thought about what kind of wedding ring he would want, even when he was very briefly engaged, but he knows instinctively this is the perfect choice for him. 

“What do you think?” David asks eagerly.

Patrick slips it on his left ring finger and says, “David, I love it. Thank you!” He pulls out the ring box holding David’s ring and says nervously, “I hope you like yours.”

David opens the box and gasps. “Patrick, how did you? Oh my god, this is perfect! It’s just like my silver ones!”

“So you like it then?”

“Like it? I love it! You did such a great job with this!”

Patrick blushes and says, “Well, I just took notice of your other rings and then saw that one and felt like it was right.”

“It absolutely is!”

After all of the excitement of today, Patrick wishes he had time to crawl into the extremely enticing bed too near him, but he knows he can just sleep on the plane, so he keeps busy to stay awake. While packing his work laptop, Patrick realizes he never spoke to his boss and he gasps.

“Are you okay, Patrick?”

Patrick whips out his phone and hits the call button immediately. He knows it’s Sunday, a day people often use to spend time with their families, and he feels guilty for calling like this, but he needs to talk to her. 

Luckily, his boss is quite fond of him and so she picks up practically as soon as he dials. He knows his boss won’t care about the fact that he’s married to a man—she’s talked before of her gay brother whom she loves more than anything—but he still finds himself nervous at the prospect of having to ask for time off after the fact, instead of before, like most people.

“Patrick, honey, I saw on the news that congratulations are in order! Why didn’t you tell me about your famous boyfriend before?”

“I, uh, I don’t like to brag,” he says tensely. “And the marriage was kind of a spur of the moment thing, very impulsive,” he continues. 

“I thought you were dating that sweet Rachel girl? What happened to her? You usually tell me about big changes like this.”

_Oh god, oh god. _Patrick is freaking out, desperately trying to figure out what to say to her. He hopes she can’t hear how heavy he is breathing.

“I, uh, I was embarrassed we broke up again. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”

“Oh, it’s completely okay, dear! You don’t owe me personal details about your life. I just have to say, I saw what you said about your husband! It was so sweet! You two look really good together! Don’t listen to all those people saying you two are clearly having problems just because you aren’t wearing rings. Rings aren’t for everyone.”

“Well, thank you. We do have rings, actually, we just sent them off to get resized and so we didn’t have them last night.”

“Aww, well that’s nice too!”

“Thank you. I’m so sorry to be so unprofessional like this, with everything happening, it escaped my mind to give you a call—”

“Let me guess, you want some time off to spend with your new husband?”

“Yes, please.”

“Of course! How long do you want to take?”

“Could I use three weeks of my vacation time? Or is that too much?”

“It’s not too much at all! In fact, I would like to give you four weeks off! Consider the extra week a wedding gift!”

Patrick couldn’t be more relieved to hear that she’s being so understanding about this. He’s very grateful for her.

“I can’t even begin to express how thankful I am to you for this.”

“Oh stop, none of that! You’re one of the best employees I have, Patrick! I’m gonna let you go now so you can relax! See you in a month!” 

“Yes, see you! Thanks again!”

He hangs up the phone and heaves a huge sigh of relief. David wanders into the room, looking alarmed.

“Patrick? Is everything alright?”

“Yes, everything is great! That was my boss and she was super understanding about my needing time off and so I’m very relieved.”

“She didn’t cause you any trouble, did she?”

“No, she’s not like that.”

Patrick sees David visibly relax and he smiles at him. Now that he’s gotten one potentially difficult phone call out of the way, he knows he should probably bite the bullet and call his parents, but the thought terrifies him and so he decides to put that one off yet again. 

They finish up their packing, chatting idly, and soon enough, Stevie’s knocking on their door again, it being time to go. 

They do a quick sweep of the room with their eyes, making sure they haven’t missed anything, and then they gather their bags—Patrick offering to get one of David’s because he only has one—and then they head for the airport.

***

Stevie and Cassie’s goodbye is hard to watch. Cassie is crying and Stevie’s tearing up, although David knows she would deny such a thing if questioned. Stevie wraps her arms around her and pulls her in close, kissing her passionately, and then she says, “I’ll see you next week, okay?”

Cassie nods and blows a kiss to her as she, David, and Patrick head inside the airport. 

They head to security, which takes forever, of course, but then, because they are first class, they get to wait to board in the lounge—something Patrick is admittedly excited about as he’s never traveled first class before. 

David whips out his Twizzlers and starts nibbling on one anxiously. Stevie goes to order a drink. Patrick takes a moment to look around. He’s sure he looks like a person who’s never seen snow before, or something akin to that. He’s pulled from his musings when he notices David’s leg bouncing up and down furiously.

“Is something wrong, David?”

“I’m not exactly the easiest flyer,” he says. “I usually take Xanax for flights, but it’s too early to take some and so yeah, I’m a little freaked out right now. I don’t think I’ve ever been on a flight where I haven’t been intoxicated in some form. Well, except for the first ever time I flew as a child. It wasn’t pretty.” 

His eyes widen, as if he hadn’t meant to say any of that, and he practically inhales the rest of his twizzler and then lays his head in his hands on his lap. Patrick scoots closer to him and starts rubbing his shoulder. It had seemed to calm him before, he only hoped it would help this time as well.

“I’m such a mess. Why did I say any of that? You probably think ill of me now.”

“I could never think ill of you, David.”

“Patrick, trust me, you don’t want to play that game.”

“David, trust _ me _, I’m not playing any game. I genuinely mean that.”

“Well then maybe you’re just as crazy as I am.”

Patrick laughs. “Well, I wouldn’t say that.”

David lifts his head up at this remark. “Wow! Just going straight in for the kill then!”

“Nothing about this is straight, David.”

“Why, Patrick Brewer, or I’m sorry, do you prefer Rose,” he says, in a bad imitation of the paparazzo from last night and sticking a fake microphone in his face, “did you just make your first gay joke? I’m proud of you!”

Patrick grabs David’s hand, or rather, the fake microphone, and kisses David’s hand. He’s about to get upset with himself for doing something so rash, so stupid, but when he catches the look on David’s face, it’s worth it. He’s trying so hard not to smile, scrunching up his face and moving his mouth sideways, biting on the inside of his cheek. 

They stare into each other’s eyes for a moment before the spell is broken and Stevie returns. 

Patrick clears his throat and excuses himself to the bathroom. 

“Did I interrupt something here?”

“Nope, no, definitely not.”

“Convincing. Don’t quit your day job, I’m not sure you’re gonna make it as an actor.”

“I act like I actually like you all the time, sure I will.”

“Damn, David, that was a good one! Color me impressed! Seriously, though, what the hell just happened?”

“I don’t know, really. We were just goofing around and he kissed my hand and then—”

“Then?”

“It really looked like he was going to kiss me, but that’s ridiculous.”

“Why is it ridiculous?”

“Stevie, he just broke up with his girlfriend! Just because he’s technically married to me doesn’t mean he actually _ likes _me.”

“A sentence I never thought I’d hear, to be honest. You’re ridiculous alright, but not for the reasons you think.”

“What? What do you mean?”

“I’m not spelling this out for you, David!”

“Well, fine, then, I’ll just check my phone now since I’m currently not talking to you.”

David actually does check his phone and what he sees makes his stomach sink.

**[From Sebastien Raine]**

Someone actually married you? Wow, what a sucker. It won’t last long though.

He doesn’t even notice that Patrick’s back and so he jumps when he hears his voice.

“Woah, there, everything’s gonna be okay, David! You won’t have to fly alone, okay? I’ll be right there beside you the whole time.”

Patrick is quite possibly the sweetest man David has ever met. He doesn’t _ get _the sweet ones. Because he’s David Rose, and he likes it rough, right? He likes them shallow, dependent, and horny, always horny. Or at least, that’s what the press would lead you to believe.

The time comes for them to board the plane and while they get settled, David’s mind drifts, once again, to Patrick’s offer, as it has been wont to do ever since Patrick had brought it up. Everyone around him thought this marriage was going to fail. It shouldn’t bother him. It’s not _ real _, but it does bother him. Remembering Sebastien’s text leaves a bad taste in his mouth.

Besides, Patrick is, as established, sweet. He’s a good guy. He seems to actually care about him, although he’s not really sure why. And so, more and more, his offer is tempting to him. 

He turns to Patrick, who looks exceedingly comfortable in his big lounge chair, and says,

“Let’s do it. Let’s stay married.”

At this, Patrick smiles widely. “You’re sure about this?”

“Yes.”

Patrick grabs his hand and squeezes it. David then graciously accepts the water he’s handed, and takes his Xanax. 

The two of them talk for a bit until David’s eyes get heavy and he can’t keep them open anymore.

David falls asleep on his shoulder and Patrick moves the cupholder that’s between their seats, knowing leaning on that can’t be comfortable. Once he’s ensured that David seems as comfortable as he can be, Patrick allows sleep to overtake him as well. 

***

Something is aggressively poking him and he wants it, no, needs it to stop, is the first thing Patrick thinks when he regains consciousness. He slowly blinks open his eyes to find Stevie—who’s sitting behind them—jabbing into his shoulder.

“Time to wake up, lover boy, the plane’s gonna land soon.”

“And why doesn’t David get this warm welcome into wakefulness?”

“Because we have unfinished business.”

Patrick looks over at David worriedly, and notices he’s still, thankfully, asleep.

“He’ll be out of it for a while still. Xanax has that effect on people. Don’t worry about it, Patrick,” Stevie says, as if reading his mind. “Now, what did you mean earlier when you said he doesn’t want to be your husband?”

“Oh, that,” Patrick says nervously. “I, uh, was hoping you’d forgotten that.”

“I don’t forget anything, so, spill.”

“Well, at the time, he still hadn’t told me whether or not he wanted to stay married so—”

“Woah, woah, woah, back up. You asked him to stay married to you? Boy, you have it real bad, don’t you?”

“I didn’t do it because I like him, Stevie!”

Stevie shot him a look.

“I didn’t _ only _ do it because I like him, Stevie! And I didn’t even realize that I did when it came up, it’s just that, well, we both are kind of embarrassed about this whole thing and so I thought we should take the narrative into our own hands. You know, stay married for a while and then have a very public break-up.”

“And what are you gonna do to repair the broken heart that inevitably comes with that?”

“What are you talking about, Stevie?”

“You are in very dangerous territory, Patrick. Your set, agreed-upon time will sneak up on you, and then what? You’re just gonna let him go?”

“I’ll do whatever he wants to do.”

“Please tell me you’re not doing this because you hope he’ll fall in love with you, Patrick.”

Just then, the plane starts to shake, and the pilot makes an announcement.

“We seem to be experiencing some unexpected turbulence. Please stay seated with your seatbelts fastened.”

Once again, Patrick turns to look worriedly over at David, remembering how he mentioned his hatred of flying. He hopes this passes quickly and that David is never the wiser.

Patrick’s mind drifts back to his talk with Stevie. He’s spent so much of his life doing what he thought everybody wanted from him, and now it’s his turn to do what he wants. Asking David to stay married is an impulsive thing to do, sure, but he feels right in his decision to have asked and he’s excited to see what comes from this.

Even if David decides he wants nothing to do with him in the future, and the two of them part ways, he will always remember how David was the first one to make him realize who he truly is: a gay man.

He feels bad about it, but eventually he has to wake David up. Which is not an easy feat and is also perhaps the scariest thing he’s ever had to do, and that’s coming from a man who woke up married to practically a stranger.

As soon as David opens his eyes, he flails around and yells “Where’s the bird?” which earns him some concerned glances from their surrounding neighbors on the plane.

They get off the plane, David still grumbling about being woken up.

“Would you rather I’d have left you on the plane, David?” Patrick teases in his light-hearted way that shows he holds no malice towards him. 

“Well, hmm, let’s think about that. It’s either that or go see my family which I’m very much not looking forward to right now.”

Patrick begins to grab their bags from baggage claim and he asks,

“Do you want to help with these or...?”

“Well, since you asked, I’d rather not, thanks so much.”

Patrick can’t help but smile at this comment. As much as he feels like he shouldn’t reward bratty David, he finds even the brattiest of his behaviors exceptionally adorable. 

He catches Stevie looking at him and immediately feels his face get hot. He doesn’t know her very well, but he knows her well enough at this point to figure she will never let him hear the end of his crush on his accidental husband.

He grabs the bags, and notices David reaches down to grab one—the smallest one—but it still fills him with warmth and affection for the man. 

They all head toward the exit and Patrick is about to ask if they should call an Uber or something when David gasps and says, “Oh my god, please tell me that what I think is happening is not happening right now.”

Patrick is about to ask what he means by this until he notices a man holding a giant sign that says “David Rose, Husband, & Friends.” This isn’t even what stands out the most, however, because the man is standing next to a sleek black stretch limo. 

David exclaims, angrily, “I’m gonna call him, why did he do this?!” and whips out his phone to do exactly that, when Stevie says, “David, I know you’re probably super embarrassed right now, but I, for one, am exhausted, and would just like to get to your place, so can you wait to yell at your dad before we’re forced to take the bus or something?”

David looks to Patrick, who silently pleads with him. He puts his phone down and sighs dramatically. “Fine, but this _ isn’t _ the end of this.”

“Of course not,” Patrick agrees. “It doesn’t have to be. It’s just, it’s late, and you mentioned it takes a while to get to your house, and also I could really use a shower.”

David purses his lips and then nods. He looks like he has more he wants to say and is trying desperately to keep it contained inside him.

Patrick thanks the man with the sign as he helps him get the bags into the car while Stevie and David get into the limo. Patrick slides in beside David as the limo driver gets into the front seat.

“Is everyone settled back there?” he asks. They all affirm they are and then he looks right at David and Patrick, sitting right beside each other in the mirror, and says, “Congratulations on your marriage.”

“Oh,” says David, shocked. He is unable to maintain eye contact, but murmurs, “Thank you.”

“I can put up the partition, if you’d like.”

Patrick wishes he had a camera so he could capture the look that crosses David’s face when the driver says this.

“Oh, _ no _ , I mean, sure, yeah, you can do that, it’s just umm, we won’t,” he coughs, “umm we won’t be _ doing _ anything back here, you don’t have to worry.”

Stevie chortles and Patrick is trying so hard not to laugh, disguising his laughter as a very unconvincing cough.

The driver merely nods and puts the partition up.

Stevie falls asleep almost as soon as the limo takes off and David and Patrick just look at her in astonishment.

Patrick notices David is kind of jittery, playing with his rings, a habit that Patrick has observed him do whenever he was nervous these past couple of days, and he places a hand on his knee. David immediately stops fidgeting and just looks at him, chewing on his lip.

“Aren’t I the one who’s supposed to be nervous here? I mean, meeting the family? After we only just got married? That’s a big deal,” he says, teasingly, trying to get David to talk to him, or at least to smile, hoping it will distract him from his worries about how these introductions will go.

It has the opposite effect of his desired outcome, making David tense up.

“Hey, hey, David, I was just kidding,” he says, rubbing his shoulders the way he’s come to realize is soothing to David. “It’s going to be okay.”

“Mhmm, you say that, but I have a feeling once you meet them, you’ll purchase a one-way ticket to the furthest place you can get from me.”

“David, I meant what I said to you before. We’re in this together, okay? I wouldn’t do that to you.”

There’s a pause and Patrick can practically hear David’s brain whirring. 

“Gucci bag for your thoughts?”

David turns and shoots him a _ look. _ “I know you’re trying to be funny, but I need you to know that we do _ not _ joke about such things, Patrick.”

“Oh, my apologies, David,” he says and then grabs David’s hand and squeezes it. “Seriously, though, what’s on your mind?”

David hesitates, mouth opening and closing several times, before asking quietly, “Are you though?”

“Am I what, David?”

He clears his throat and looks away from Patrick, unable to look him in the eye. “You asked if you’re the one who’s meant to be nervous and I want to know if you are. I mean, I know you said you were the other night, but has it gotten better or umm, is it still—” he trails off, as if unsure how or unable to clearly articulate what he’s trying to say. 

“I’ll be honest, I’m still a little nervous, but a lot of my nerves stem from the fact that I haven’t spoken to my own parents yet.”

David nods, trying to appear less freaked out than he is by this statement. 

He can’t imagine what Patrick must be going through and he is amazed at how he just takes it in stride. Patrick went from having—presumably—a somewhat normal life to being married to a man—after just having broken up with a seemingly long-term girlfriend—forced into the spotlight, and on his way to meeting said man’s parents.

David doesn’t know what he would do if he had to meet Patrick’s parents right away. He’s never kept anyone’s interest for long enough to even hit the “meeting the parents” stage. The thought of meeting Patrick’s parents horrifies him. How would they feel about him—the man who ruined their son’s life? He can’t imagine them feeling anything but disdain for him and he honestly could not blame them in the slightest. 

He wonders what they are like, where this far-too-sweet-of-a-man came from, and before he can stop himself, he blurts out, “Tell me about them? Umm, if you want to, that is.”

Patrick smiles—a tiny little smile, but a smile nevertheless—and asks, amusedly, “What exactly do you want to know?”

“Are you close to them?”

“Yes, pretty close. I’m an only child so it was always just the two of them and me, but I do have a pretty big extended family.”

David loves seeing Patrick get so happy talking about his cousins and the big gatherings they have. He finds himself maybe even getting a little envious at how close he seems to his family. David’s never felt all that close to his family, but he’s glad Patrick has that. 

He’s so caught up in listening to Patrick—something he’s come to realize he would do for hours if given the opportunity—that at first he doesn’t realize the limo has pulled to a stop.

“I’m gonna go get the bags,” Patrick says, “and leave you with the sure-to-be-very-fun task of waking Stevie up. Good luck,” he says, smirking, and patting his knee before opening the door and getting out of the limo.

David starts out by calling Stevie’s name, but she stays sleeping. He inches closer to her and shakes her shoulder, but this still doesn’t work. He takes a water bottle out of the mini-fridge and pours a bit on her head, not knowing how else to wake her up—and also because he’s a bit of an asshole.

She wakes up, shivering, and glaring at him, water running down from the top of her head and dripping off.

“Oh, you better sleep with one eye open after that, Rose,” she threatens in a low, gravelly voice.

“You can’t touch me, I’ll be sleeping with Patrick and you can’t get him too,” David says confidently before he can think about what he said.

“You think I have any problem getting Patrick to get to you, you're in for a world of surprises,” Stevie responds, her voice still rough.

David wants to say that Patrick would never team up with Stevie over him, that he barely knows her, but he realizes it would be dumb for him to say such a thing, considering Patrick’s pretty much known Stevie as long as himself. He also worries a bit because Patrick and Stevie seem to share a hobby of teasing him and he has to admit—in his head, not to Stevie—that this cannot end well for him. 

David and Stevie get out of the limo and join Patrick, who’s outside and struggling with the bags. Stevie reaches down and helps him, and he shoots her a grateful look. 

Patrick takes in the apartment building the limo pulled in front of and then looks at David and says, “I didn’t realize you all live in an apartment together.”

David blushes and looks down as his shoes nervously, “Oh, umm, my dad owns this building. My parents live in the penthouse and then my sister and I each have our own apartment.” He turns to Stevie and says, “We can get you and Cassie set up in your own apartment,” and then, looking up at Patrick, locking eyes with him, he says, “And, umm, you can stay with me, you know, since we, umm, are married and everything.” 

When they enter the lobby, all of the Roses are in the foyer, acting like they weren’t waiting for them to walk in the door at any moment. 

David starts in on the introductions, knowing the sooner this gets done, the sooner they can head upstairs to their respective apartments and get some sleep. 

“Patrick, Stevie, this is my family. Mom, Dad, Alexis, this is my, uh, husband Patrick and my new friend Stevie.”

“David! I didn’t know you could make friends,” Alexis comments, in a tone that suggests that this is genuinely brand-new information for her and that she’s maybe even proud of him for it.

“Extraordinarily new,” says Stevie, her amusement showing through.

“Okay, so like, how much did he pay you? Did he buy you this..._ plaid _...you’re wearing or did you get that from a homeless person or something?” Alexis asks sympathetically, running her finger down Stevie’s sleeve.

“This is my flannel,” Stevie says lamely as David retorts, “Slip on a banana peel, Alexis.”

Alexis rolls her eyes and strides over to Patrick, wiggling her hips as she stands far-too-close to him. Patrick is completely oblivious to it, but the effect is not lost on Stevie, whose eyes are glued to Alexis as she walks. David rolls his eyes at this, but when Alexis brushes her hand on Patrick’s right cheek, he lets out a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding in, and folds his arms, seeing red.

Johnny, noticing this, says, “Hey, now, Alexis, get your hands off your brother’s husband. It’s bad enough you stole several of his significant others in the past, we don’t need to be in the news again so soon.”

David just stares at his father, mouth wide open, flabbergasted. Alexis, removes her hand from Patrick’s face with a pout, but then says, “We saw some pictures on the news, but they do _ not _ do you justice, Patrick. David, how on earth did you manage to get a cute little thing like this to marry you?”

“I’ll have you know—”

“You know,” says Alexis, batting her eyelashes. “I was rated in the top twenty best kissers in last year’s Cosmo.” She turns to look at David and continues, “David was devastated that he didn’t make the cut. I was number two. Number five, who should’ve been number ten if you consider number seven, told me in confidence that you were number twenty-four. Well,” she says, turning back to Patrick, “I’m sure you know he’s not top twenty worthy, Patrick.”

Patrick, who hadn’t said anything—hadn’t been able to do much of anything besides slow blink—since entering the apartment building, opens his mouth and says, “I think that’s very unfair of you to say, Alexis. David is an excellent kisser.”

It surprises him that he was able to get the words out so smoothly, but he knows his face is bright red because saying this reminds him that David is, indeed, a good kisser, and the image of the two of them making out once again presents itself in his head.

“Okay, well it’s been a _ very _ long night and so I think we ought to be getting to bed.”

“Oh, sure, sure, son. We’ll talk more tomorrow,” Johnny says.

David, with Stevie and Patrick following, gets onto the elevator and hits the floor for both of their apartments—having gotten the key to a previously unoccupied apartment on his floor from his father. They get off the elevator and David shows Stevie to where she and Cassie will be staying. Patrick trails behind, and once Stevie’s settled, the two of them head inside David’s apartment.

They walk inside and close the door, and David sighs loudly. David gives him an extremely fast tour. 

“This is obviously the living room. Kitchen’s in there. Bathroom right over there. A little dining area, and then finally the bedroom’s back here.”

They walk into the bedroom and Patrick looks around the room, surprised and amazed. There’s art all over the walls, which isn’t surprising considering David’s affinity for art. There’s a large oval mirror on the wall, and a beautiful crystal chandelier in the center of the ceiling. 

The bed is the most breathtaking part of the room, however. David’s bed is a king-sized four poster, with black curtains covering the outside. The sheets are Egyptian cotton and look extremely soft. Knowing what he knows about David, the room is very him, matching his black-and-white aesthetic.

“Oh my god, I’m _ so _sorry about him. More often than not the man walks around with his foot in his mouth.”

Patrick puts the bags down by the door while David sits on the bed.

“Sorry about all of them, actually,” he continues, looking down at the floor.

“Don’t be sorry!” Patrick says cheerfully. “I like your family, David.”

“You don’t have to lie,” David says, but he’s smiling a little bit now. “And you also don’t have to listen to anything Alexis says, ever.”

“Oh yeah, I didn’t believe that one,” Patrick chuckles, and some of the tension in David’s body dissipates but is also replaced with new tension of wondering what Patrick means by notbelieving that David is a bad kisser.

“Good, she’s wrong and doesn’t know what she’s talking about,” David says, starting to pull out his line of nightly skincare products, and then he hesitates before saying, “It was very nice of you to defend me, though.”

“Well, I couldn’t just let her tell blatant lies about you that I know for a fact to be untrue.”

Patrick’s eyes widen. He hadn’t meant to actually say that out loud. David’s looking at him, confusedly, and there’s no taking it back, as much as he wishes he could just pull the words from David’s mind and pretend he never uttered them. 

“Umm, what, what do you mean?” David asks. “We, umm, we haven’t—”

“No, we definitely have,” Patrick says, figuring he should just get this over with. “I didn’t tell you because I was, umm, embarrassed about it, but uh, the very first thing I remembered from Friday night was the two of us kissing.”

David just stares at him and Patrick is unable to tell how he’s feeling from the blank, untelling look on his face. In his panic, he blurts out,

“Do you need a reminder?” He coughs, face turning bright red, wishing the rational, articulate, not-embarrassing part of his brain would saw a hole in the floor beneath him like in a Looney Tunes cartoon and get him out of this increasingly awkward situation. 

The wind feels knocked out of David’s lungs. He hadn’t known what to expect at all, but it certainly was not _ that _.

He chokes.

“Uh. Yes. Yeah, I mean, if you think that’s a good idea, we can do that.”

Quickly, to try to save face—as if such a thing could be done at this point—he says, “I just think, you know, people are gonna ask. Plus next time I can defend you with some sober experience to back it up,” Patrick says, and David swears he says it flirtily but he also swears he’s going crazy.

Patrick’s never like this—stuttery, inarticulate, and making a fool out of himself in front of someone—but then again, he’s never felt like this for anyone else before. 

“I, uh, I think I could be amenable to that,” David says. “For the sake of practice, of course.”

David sets his bag of skincare products down and joins Patrick, who had been sitting on the edge of the bed. David leans in closer and Patrick worries that his heart is beating so loudly that David will hear it and be weirded out by it, but then David’s kissing him and nothing else matters. His thoughts are consumed with David and how wonderful kissing him feels. 

David finds that he could get used to this “practice” business if this is what it feels like. Patrick’s matching him in terms of enthusiasm and things are really started to get heated. All of a sudden, his brain supplies him with an equally passionate moment shared between the two of them. 

_They’re close_—_so close_—_but David wants them to be closer. He’s kissing Patrick’s neck and Patrick’s breathing heavily, trying to regain his breath. Patrick pulls him in to kiss him again and David straddles him, grinding their cocks together through their clothes. _

_Patrick stops and pulls away and David wonders what he did wrong. Maybe he just realized how repulsive and horrifying of a mistake this was. David barely heard what he said, but he heard the words “sleep with you” and “can’t” and his worst fears were realized. _

David pulls away, not looking Patrick in the eye. Patrick wonders what changed. Just a couple of minutes ago, he seemed to be into it, and now he won’t even look at him. 

_He just wants to practice, to make everything look realistic, to not have anyone be suspicious of them. That’s all he wants from this. That’s why he asked to practice, _David thinks. 

He didn’t know why he was getting so upset about this either. It’s not like he’s never been rejected before, but why had Stevie been trying so hard to convince her Patrick was anything but straight? The flash of memory that came to him just now was more than enough proof for him that he’s straight. Patrick was just drunk and horny. It wouldn’t be the first time someone had only wanted him when they were drunk. 

David picks up his bag and rushes off to the bathroom, not answering when Patrick calls after him, simply pretending he didn’t hear him.

Patrick knows he must have done something wrong, but he has no idea what. Had David agreed to this out of some sense of obligation? Had he gone too far? 

It feels like Patrick’s been lost in his thoughts for hours by the time David emerges from the bathroom. David continues to avoid looking at him, instead looking at the floor. 

Patrick goes into the bathroom to brush his teeth and change into pajamas, forgoing the shower he had desperately wanted before. 

When he comes out of the bathroom, the light is off in the room and it’s eerily quiet. Patrick fumbles around in the dark, feeling his way towards the bed. He slides in, his eyes adjusting to the dark. He sees David facing away from him, and having scooched as far on his side of the bed as he could, presumably to not come into contact with him.

“David, can we talk, please?”

David ignores him, or is already asleep, but he figures the former is most likely. He’s exhausted and jet-lagged and his body is screaming at him to get some rest, but his mind just won’t let him.

He hears soft snores coming from David’s side of the bed and he feels relief. At least one of them will be well-rested for whatever is in store for them tomorrow.


	2. New York

Patrick startles awake by a loud bang, shooting upright in bed while his brain tries to catch up with what’s going on.

“Morning, lovebirds!” Stevie crows loudly, her arm still outstretched to have her open palm on the door she’d just flung open. She surveys the two of them in the bed. “Maybe not lovebirds, with how far apart you are. Having problems in the marital bed?”

Patrick flops back onto the pillows and doesn’t want to dignify her with a response., but quickly realizes she is in their apartment. “Stevie, what the hell are you doing in here? More importantly, _ how _ did you get in here?”

“You left the door unlocked,” she shrugs. “Come on, get up,” Stevie prods. “The Roses have very nicely asked if we want to have breakfast with them.”

“A stack of blueberry pancakes, French toast, bacon, and sausage. And eggs. And hash browns,” David mumbles, his face pressed into the pillow.

“Done. Patrick?”

“Go away,” Patrick grumbles, eyes closed. 

“Burnt toast it is then,” Stevie replies, unaffected by Patrick’s sour mood. “Some sauerkraut and liver on top. Got it.”

Patrick groans loudly and hoists himself up with visible and exaggerated effort. “I’ll go see what’s on the menu,” he says and pads out the door.

“Told you, it’s burnt toast,” Stevie calls casually after him.

David feels a dip in the bed and glares at Stevie. “Is there something I can help you with or are you just enjoying watching me sleep like some pervert?”

“What’s going on with you and Patrick?” Stevie asks bluntly, bouncing up and down on the bed a little.

“I don’t know what on earth you mean,” David replies, avoiding her gaze. 

“Don’t play dumb with me, David. Patrick acted like he couldn’t get out of here faster and you have more bags under your eyes than Prada.”

David sits up so abruptly when she says this that he forgot he was on the edge of the bed and falls over onto the floor.

“Well, now you’ve got the dramatic flair to match them.”

“At least I own more than one shirt. Did you seriously sleep in what you wore yesterday?”

“Uh, that was a Wallace plaid flannel, and this one is red buffalo plaid. You should know that, fashion man.”

“Why do _ you _know that?!” David cries, gesticulating with his arms.

“It’s the lesbianism,” Stevie says dryly, and then continues, “Stop trying to distract me, it won’t work. I’m not leaving here until you tell me what’s going on with Patrick.”

“Why don’t you ask him?”

“I don’t want to ask him. I’m asking you. Besides, I’m a cat person, but not really in the mood to chat with Grumpy Cat this morning.” 

“He, umm, he feels very passionately about burnt toast. Didn’t you know that?”

“Is that so?”

“Oh yes. You just don’t know him like I do.”

“Well, you got me there.”

Stevie just stares at him, engaging him in a staredown, but when David tries to look away, she doesn’t let him. 

“David, whatever you’re telling yourself about him that’s gotten you to try to run away all of a sudden, I can assure you, it’s not true.”

David stands up from the floor—where he has been sitting ever since he fell down—and looks away from her, pacing. 

“I’m not running away. He’s the one who said he was embarrassed to have kissed me!”

“Wait, woah, go back! You two kissed?”

“He told me we kissed when we were drunk, but was too embarrassed to bring it up and then he wanted to practice kissing so that it would look natural in front of everyone and then while we were kissing, I just started remembering every straight guy who has ever experimented with me while drunk and then mocked me while sober and I just...can’t do this, Stevie.”

“And what exactly makes you think Patrick’s like that?” Stevie points out. 

“This isn’t the first time he’s used the word embarrassed about this situation, Stevie. He’s a straight guy who was horny and I was the closest, most convenient option.”

“Yeah, cause straight people suggest ‘practicing’ kissing with their real-fake husband,” Stevie says sarcastically. “Believe me, I don’t understand the way straight’s minds work, but I’m pretty sure they don’t do _ that _.”

“I’m not talking about this with you anymore. I’ve been burned too many times to even hope he could be into me, even if everything you’re saying is true.”

“The only way he could set you on fire is with his looooove.”

“Okay, we’re done here. Best wishes!”

“Warmest regards!” Stevie shouts behind him as he hurries towards the bathroom to get ready for the day. 

***

Patrick really wishes he and David had gotten a chance to talk before he has to go and face all the Roses plus Stevie. He also, more than anything, just really wishes the two of them were on speaking terms again. He’s having an extremely hard time feeling confident when all he wants to do is curl back up in bed next to David. 

He wonders if coming clean about the two of them kissing was the wrong move. Or perhaps David is upset about the fact that he hadn’t brought it up sooner? Whatever the reason, David isn’t talking to him, and he could not be more miserable. 

Patrick knocks on the door and someone who Patrick assumes works for the Roses opens the door. It’s definitely going to take some time to get used to all of this, he thinks. The person who opened the door ushers him into the dining room where he’s told the Roses will be soon.

The only person in the dining room when Patrick arrives is Alexis. She stands up and squeals, running up to him to give him a hug. She takes his hand in hers and pulls him to the table.

“You should sit beside me! We’re siblings now and I feel like I know _ nothing _ about you!”

“Oh, yeah, okay,” is all Patrick can say because Alexis is already pulling him into the seat before she flounces to hers. Patrick doesn’t know how she manages to flounce taking only one step, but he supposes it’s how Alexis walks.

David, quickly followed by Stevie, finally arrives downstairs, having done his hair and skincare to “morning style,” as far as he deemed acceptable for people to see at breakfast.

“David! I was just talking to your husband here,” Alexis chirps, pawing Patrick’s arm with a limp wrist, and Patrick stares at the place she touched dumbly, thinking that they hadn’t actually talked at all.

“Last time I checked, talking didn’t require the use of one’s _ hands_,” David grumbles, scowling at Alexis until her arm is once again in her own lap and not on Patrick. 

“You know, I will happily switch places with Patrick so you two can sit together,” Stevie pipes up.

Alexis beams. “Then we’ll be sitting together!”

The look on Stevie’s face suggests that this is exactly what she had in mind.

David glares at her. Just because he didn’t want Alexis touching Patrick, didn’t mean he wants to sit next to him necessarily. Stevie knows he’s not exactly happy with Patrick at the moment, but he also knows that she doesn’t care. 

He sighs, and seeing his parents come in and not wanting them to suspect anything, begrudgingly sits, Patrick following his lead. 

Once Johnny and Moira are seated, and all the food is brought in by the personal chef the Roses apparently have, there is only a moment of silence before Johnny asks,

“So, Patrick, what is it you do exactly?”

“Uh, I work in business.”

“Ohhhh, a businessman, huh? Good man, good man! We’ll have to talk business together sometime! Not now, though, wouldn’t want to bore the rest of them to tears,” Johnny laughs and Patrick joins in while David rolls his eyes and Alexis checks her phone. 

“I would love that, Mr. Rose.”

“Patrick, please, call me Johnny. You are married to my son, after all. Speaking of which, how long have you two known each other? David certainly never mentioned you.”

“Yeah, well, it’s not like any of you ever _ asked _ what was going on with me,” David says.

“David, that’s not FAIR! I’m supposed to keep on top of my busy schedule and find time to inquire after which person you’re dating this week?!”

“Now, Moira, dear, we can at least inquire after Patrick! I’m sure...uh…I’m sure he’s not the person of the week, as you so...nicely put it. Patrick, when did you say you came into our son’s life again?” 

“Dad, stop harassing him! You all wonder why I don’t bring people around, this is precisely why.”

Patrick puts his hand on top of David’s in an attempt to calm him down and says, “It’s quite alright, David. I don’t mind answering a few questions.” He looks up at Johnny and says, “We haven’t known each other for all that long, but when it’s right, you just know.”

“David, your paramour’s passion is refreshing. That type of declaration is only something found in shows akin to _ Sunrise Bay _ nowadays.”

“Oh, so now you like him all of a sudden?” David snaps. 

Moira looks aghast. “I don’t believe I ever said anything to the contrary Dahyhdvid!!!”

David feels as if his eyes will actually get stuck that way if he rolls his eyes again so he refrains and instead looks away from his mother and at Stevie which he discovers is a mistake as she has a shit-eating grin on her face and a glint in her eye. 

Alexis folds her arms in front of her, opening her mouth in surprise and joy when she heard what Patrick said. “How did you two meet anyway?”

David took a large gulp of coffee, eyes widening ever-so-slightly, and Patrick calmly replies, “We met at a bar.”

David spends the next few minutes attempting to deflect any and all questions from his family’s interrogation with Patrick insisting it’s fine and that he doesn’t mind their questions. 

There’s a break in the conversation and Stevie coughs. “Hey, Patrick, can you show me where the bathroom is?”

Patrick looks at her in confusion. “Why are you asking me? This isn’t my apartment! Besides, the layouts to these places are pretty much the same so you should know where the bathroom is!”

“I forgot and I really need_ you _ to help me find it,” Stevie says, giving Patrick a pointed look. 

“Uh okay, excuse me, everyone,” Patrick says as he stands. Stevie entwines their arms together and they leave the room. Stevie walks right toward the bathroom.

“Stevie! What are you doing?!”

Stevie smacks him on the arm. “What was _ that _?”

“What was what? If I had known you were going to hit me and interrogate me, I would never have let you whisk me away like that.”

“Okay, well, your first mistake was not seeing the interrogation coming! After that little speech you just gave!”

“What speech? God, am I allowed to _ do _anything without someone getting on me for it? First David’s upset with me and now you! I might as well just stop talking!”

“Okay, calm down, drama queen, I was just asking a question!”

“Yeah, but I don’t understand what’s so confusing about it! I told you on the plane how I feel so don’t act so surprised.”

Stevie murmurs something under her breath and Patrick doesn’t know exactly what she says, but he hears the word “stupid” and can only imagine. 

***

David has no idea what Stevie wants with Patrick or what stunt she is trying to pull, but he resents the fact that now he’s left with his family. He’s in the middle of wishing desperately he would just disappear when his father begins to speak.

“David—”

David already knows he does not want to hear whatever his dad is going to say. He has that tone in the way he says his name and no amount of closing his eyes and looking up toward the sky, wishing to be transported literally anywhere else is going to spare him from having to hear it. 

“David, I’m just a little concerned about your marriage situation. I mean, do you even know this guy?”

“Excuse me? Do you think I would marry someone without knowing who they are?” It’s true that he had done just that, but his dad didn’t need to know that. He hates the fact that his dad doesn’t trust him to make good decisions and so he can’t help but hop on the defensive. 

“Well, I’m sorry, son, I’m just asking. Did you at least get him to sign a pre-nup?!”

“A pre-nup?! Why on earth would I have him sign that?!”

“Well, how do we know he’s not just with you for your money?”

David thinks back to what Patrick said to that paparazzo: _ As for your accusations that I married David for his family’s money, I have to say that they are borderline slanderous. I love David and the decision to marry him was the easiest decision I’ve made in my life. _ The naturally calm and seemingly genuine way he had said that made David believe he wasn’t in this for money, even though he knows Patrick doesn’t _ love _ him, could never _ love _ him. 

This is just like his father to try to find a negative in something good, _ someone _ good, in his life. 

“You mean _your_ money?! That’s what this is really about, isn’t it? You’re worried my marriage will end in disaster and make you look bad and wipe you of your precious fortune. Oh, poor me, my son is a screw-up who never makes wise decisions!”

“David, I didn’t mean—”

“I knew very well what you meant, thanks so much. Now, behave, please. My _ no-good, greedy _husband is coming back.”

Patrick and Stevie retake their seats and everyone spends the rest of breakfast in uncomfortable silence. Slowly, one-by-one, each of the Roses head to where they need to be for the day. Johnny, to work; Moira, to set; and Alexis, to, well, she didn’t mention where she was going, but she left too. 

Stevie, Patrick, and David are the only ones left at the table until Stevie gets a facetime request from Cassie and then she leaves the room too, presumably heading back to her apartment. 

David and Patrick head back to their apartment in awkward silence. Once inside, David takes a seat on the couch, and Patrick hesitates before taking a seat further down the couch from him. 

Patrick stares at David, wanting to clear the air, wanting to say something, but not wanting to make any sudden movement that would scare David off since he knows he’s on thin ice with him already. 

The air is heavy, intense, and David can’t take it anymore. He opens his mouth, but closes it again, not knowing what to say.

Patrick decides to bite the bullet and says, “I know we need to talk about last night, but uh, I couldn’t help but hear what your dad said and how you defended me and I just want to say thank you. But umm, I also want to be very clear. I can sign something, anything, if it would put your dad at ease. I just want whatever’s best for you, David. I don’t want to make life harder for you.”

Upon hearing this, David looks at Patrick, really looks at him, and sees sincerity in his eyes. He doesn’t know why, but he wants to trust him. No, not wants to, he _ does _ trust him. 

“No, you, you don’t have to do that.”

“I know I don’t have to, but I will. I need you to know that.”

David tears his eyes away from Patrick’s, not able to take how genuine and sweet and just plain _ nice _ this man is.

“About last night—”

“Nope, nope, nope, don’t you even _ think _ about apologizing to me about last night. You didn’t do anything wrong. I just panicked.”

“Panicked? About what? Can I help?”

David laughs nervously. “That’s a topic for another, much drunker conversation. I mean, it’s not like we can drunkenly get married again so I’m thinking such a thing would be safe.”

Patrick joins in laughing. "So, I’ve been thinking—”

“A sentence starter that bodes well for my anxiety…”

“I realize that scheduling kissing is not something that normal couples do so we shouldn’t either. How about we just do what comes natural to us and see if that works, okay?"

David wants to tell Patrick he didn’t pull away because of him. Well, he did, but there was a lot more to it than that. But he knows if he says that, Patrick would ask him to explain and then, knowing his rambly self, he’d spill all his deepest, darkest secrets to this man—because he wants to, he really wants to—and then Patrick would know all about every other person who didn’t want him and he’d realize he doesn’t want him even for pretend and then he would surely divorce him and never see him ever again. 

He also wants to tell Patrick he enjoys his company and he’s not mad anymore but he’s never been one for big declarations or human emotions, but all he ends up saying is “That sounds good!”

Patrick smiles and nods and then that’s that on that topic. Patrick mentions he’s going to call his parents and talk to them finally and David clears out, wanting to give him privacy. 

Finger hovering over the call button, Patrick takes a deep breath. He has no idea how this is going to go, but he knows very well that he cannot put it off any longer. 

Closing his eyes, and taking one final deep breath, he hits call and then stands up and starts pacing, simultaneously hoping his mom will answer and not answer. He’s about to hang up, ready to say he gave it a try and will try again tomorrow when he hears his mom’s voice.

“Hello? Patrick? Honey?”

“Hi, mom,” he says, voice wavering. He doesn’t know where the tears came from, but just hearing his mom’s voice makes him wish he had done this a lot sooner. No matter what happens in this phone call, she’s still his mother and everything will be okay. _ Right? _

“Oh, honey, why are you crying?”

“I,” he chokes out, “it’s just good to hear your voice. I’m sorry I didn’t call sooner. Can you—can you please get Dad? I’m sure you both have a lot of questions.”

“Of course. Just give me a second.”

He hears his mother shuffling to go get his father and he uses this time to try to compose himself. 

“Okay, we’re both here, Patrick.”

“Hi, dad,” Patrick says.

“Hi, Patrick.”

“Were you just worried about how we’d react? Is that why you didn’t invite us to the wedding?”

Patrick opens his mouth to respond and hears his dad chiding his mom for jumping right in on the questioning. 

“There’s, uh, something you don’t know. No one knows, actually. And I’d very much like to keep it that way.”

“Something else no one knows?” his dad asks.

“I got very very drunk while in Las Vegas. I met David that Friday night I was there and we bonded over our various misfortunes. I was upset about Rachel and how I could never figure out why it wasn’t right with her. I never—_we _ never intended to get married. We just woke up the next day and saw the news and realized we were.”

“So, do you need a lawyer or something? Do you two want an annulment?”

“No.”

“I don’t understand.”

“The plan is for us to stay married for a while and then down the line, we’ll get an amicable divorce.”

“So this is a publicity stunt for him? For David, I mean? But what do you get out of that, Patrick? Why would you do that for him, someone you don’t even know?”

“Clint, he’s our son, that’s why. He does nice things for people all the time.”

“It’s...it’s not like that. Not exactly. Not for me. I feel like I’ve known him forever. And I know a phone call is not exactly the best way to tell you this, but I finally figured out why things with Rachel never felt right. Mom, Dad, I’m gay.”

He stops pacing at this moment, holding his breath, waiting to hear what they are going to say. 

“Patrick, we love you and just want you to be happy,” Marcy says. “So you really like this David, huh? Does he know how you feel about him?”

“No, he doesn’t.”

“Well, why on earth not?! You’re already married! Oh, this is like a backwards fairy tale!”

Patrick laughs and laughs and the anxiety that had made its home in the pit of his stomach finally started to dissipate.

***

_ One Week Later _

Stevie had been insufferable the entire week, waiting for the day Cassie would be in New York. Finally, the day arrives and it just so happens to fall on a day when they all eat a family dinner together—a tradition Johnny wanted to start in the hopes of getting to know his children and their friends and spouse better. David is relieved Cassie will be here soon, mostly because he knows Stevie’s mouth will be too preoccupied with other things to constantly talk about how excited she is that Cassie’s here.

The Roses—well, Johnny, mostly—offer to send a car to get Cassie from the airport, but Stevie declines, insisting on picking up her girlfriend herself.

While Stevie is gone, Johnny and Moira and Alexis all settle in the living room, an unusual occurrence as usually everyone drifts apart immediately after dinner, going off to do their own things. They all stare at David and Patrick, who are sitting together on the couch watching TV.

(Patrick had asked before why they couldn’t just go use their own TV, and David had insisted his parents’ one was better, but secretly, he suspects David just wants to be around his family longer and he can’t fault him for that.)

Wondering what they are up to and why they are staring at him, David asks, frantically, “What? What? Why are you all staring at me? Do I have something on my face?”

“We have a surprise for youuuuuuu,” Alexis sing-songs. The fact that she looks so excited about this surprise—in fact, that all of them look so excited—is a clear indication that whatever the surprise is, he’s going to hate it.

“Okay, well, unless it’s an endless supply of the products used in my skincare routine or peace far away from all of you, I don't think I want it."

“Now, David, it’s not just for you, it’s for both you and Patrick!”

“Yeah, David, you heard Dad! It’s not all about you all the time!”

“I don’t believe that’s what I said, Alexis.”

“We’re throwing you a grand soirée for the celebration of your neoteric nuptials!!!” As she said this, Moira stood up and clapped her hands and looked at the two of them as if they would jump for joy at this announcement. 

“You’re doing what?!” David squawked. “Why? Why would you do that? And when?”

“It’ll be this Saturday! We wanted it to be as close to your wedding as possible, but we also wanted to make sure your friend Cassie would be here.”

David looks freaked out and like he wants to scream at them for doing this so Patrick jumps in and smiles at them all. “Thank you, Roses. That’s so kind of you to do that for us.” He takes David’s hand in his, pulling him up off the couch, and says, “We’d better be going now, but this is so exciting!”

The Roses all say their farewells and once the door is shut behind them, David exclaims, “Why did you do that?”

“Do what?”

“_ Thank _ them for the party! It’ll only encourage them!”

“Come on, David, it’s just a party! And they’re excited for you. For us. Just let them have this.”

_ But it’s all a lie! _David wants to scream at him, but doesn’t. He doesn’t think he will be able to stand it, being surrounded by people giving their well-wishes for what they hope will be a long and happy marriage. If only they knew the truth.

As they head into their apartment, they see Stevie and Cassie making out against their own apartment door down the hall. David clears his throat. Cassie looks up at him and blushes and Stevie just stares at him.

“That sort of thing is kinda why we gave you your own apartment, you know! Nobody wants to see that!”

Stevie just flips him off without stopping kissing Cassie, but the two of them head inside their apartment and David and Patrick head into theirs as well. 

***

The night of the party arrives quicker than David hopes, as is bound to happen with dreaded things. No amount of begging, pleading, or threatening to refuse to go to the party over the past week had made any difference, the party planning continues and David wants to disappear.

Being a Rose, David has attended his fair share of parties over the years. Each of them as dreadfully pompous and frivolous as the last. Really the only thing David enjoys about these lavish parties is the fact that he can get drunk or high or what-have-you, and nobody will care because they are also under the influence of something or other.

The only thing that stops David from just storming out is Patrick. David sees his face whenever his parents talk about party details and he realizes just how not universal his experiences are. He knows he could not show up and leave Patrick to fend for himself or he could even ask Patrick to ditch with him and he probably would do so, but David couldn’t bring himself to ask that of Patrick. Patrick has already done so much for him, who is he to deny him this experience, as hectic and cacophonous and pretentious it may be?

With that in mind, he resolves himself to try. Try to act like he wants to be there at least a little bit, try to enjoy himself, try to pretend to be someone in love. He finds himself grateful for the fact that since it’s nowhere near Christmastime and he’s one of the people being celebrated at this party that if his mother tries to whip out _ the Number _ , he can refuse. Patrick does _ not _ need to witness that display.

***

An hour of schmoozing with his parents’ rich friends and accepting their congratulations goes by and David has had enough. He spots Cassie, Stevie, and Patrick all standing near the open bar and he excuses himself from Mr. Townshend—who evidently needs to just get laid, but probably can’t due to his boring, well, everything—and rushes over to them.

“Thanks for the invite, everyone,” he says sarcastically to his friends. The word sends a little thrill through him: _ friends. _He’s still a little shocked he has one of those, let alone multiple.

“Enjoying yourself, David?” Stevie asks, shoving sweet and sour meatballs in her mouth.

David ignores her and looks at Patrick and asks, “Why did you leave me alone to deal with Mr. Townshend? That was a nightmare. I’m surprised I lived to be honest.”

“Oh, you looked like you were handling it,” said Patrick with a teasing smile on his face.

“He’s had his fair share of interactions. Everyone wants to talk to the _ Rose boy’s husband _.” Stevie uses air quotes on those last three words.

David gapes at her and says, “I can’t believe you just did that.”

“Me neither. Just blame the vodka.” Stevie looks over at Cassie’s nearly empty plate. “You might want to eat more. You’ll need _ all _ your energy tonight.”

Stevie grins at her suggestively, David says “Okay, ew,” and Stevie grabs Cassie’s hand and the two of them race off towards the nearest waiter, giggling.

“I’m really sorry about all this,” Davids says nervously as soon as the girls are out of earshot. “My parents always go way overboard for their parties, I should have known a wedding party would be no exception.”

He’s honestly waiting for a lecture on how overly extravagant this is, or how wasteful or excessive, but none comes. Patrick just smiles at him and puts his hands on his shoulders.

“David, look at me. I’m having a great time, okay? You don’t need to worry about me!”

“You clearly don’t know me very well. I’m literally _ always _ worried. Like all the time. Incessantly. Without fail. But who said I was worried about you?”

“Wow, isn’t that just so considerate of you.”

David feels a sense of calm come over him as they tease each other. This is normal. This is what he’s used to. He may not be excited about way over-the-top parties, but he gets a little thrill every time Patrick quips back.

“You know me. Always thinking of others. David Rose: egotistical, dramatic, whiny. Hmm I guess it doesn’t quite fit, does it?”

“David, ever since I’ve known you, you’ve cared for others. When we first figured out we got married, you handled yourself so well. I had my freakout and you were composed. You were there for me, reassuring me that you'd take care of it. You didn't have to do that. Don’t sell yourself short.” As he says this, he cups his hands on David’s face and looks into his eyes.

David wants to look away, but can’t bring himself to. He feels tears prick his eyes, but blinks them away. Alcohol must have made him a sap. _ Or maybe it’s the man in front of you. _

Their little moment is interrupted by a flash and David turns, startled, to see an unfamiliar guest capturing the two of them together on their iPhone. When she sees that she’s gotten their attention, she says, “Hello, you two! Can I get a posed photo of the two of you?”

David wants to not only not let her take another photo, he wants to rip the phone out of her hand and delete the other photo, but he doesn’t have to figure out a semi-polite way to say that before Patrick steps in and says, “I’m sorry, but we’re just very busy at the moment. Maybe try to find us later?”

Spotting an untouched, unopened bottle of whiskey, David swipes it, and grabs Patrick’s arm. 

“I’ve gotta get out of here for a while. Wanna join me?”

“Absolutely! Did you, umm, know that woman back there?”

“No, I have _ no _ idea who that is! And if that photo she took of us ends up anywhere near the tabloids, she _ will _be hearing from Ruth Harper.”

“Sorry, Ruth Harper?” Patrick asks, looking extremely confused.

“My dad’s attorney.”

“Ah.”

“We can go to my dad’s office. No one’s allowed in there so we can have some peace and quiet.”

The two of them enter the dark study and David quickly turns on the light. As soon as Patrick’s in, he locks the door and heaves a huge sigh.

“Are you doing alright?” Patricks asks, concerned.

“I am now. Big crowds are a lot for me sometimes and I’m not nearly drunk enough to handle it.”

Noticing the bottle in David’s hand, Patrick says, “Well, I’m sure that’ll do the trick for us both.”

The two of them head over to the fancy couch in the middle of the office and take a seat. Patrick takes a moment to admire the office. As with everything else in the Rose’s apartment, it is impressive. There is, of course, a desk near a set of windows. There are also several large desktop computers, and fancy wooden bookshelves filled with the kind of books that are meant to only look impressive. 

“So this is where the famous Johnny Rose does business, huh?” 

David sighs. “Yeah. I don’t come in here much, it’s boring. I don’t know what he does up here.”

“You know, I used to work at a Rose Video in high school,” Patrick says. “Yeah, and sometimes we’d get corporate video messages from your dad, and they were always in this room. I always thought it was a green screen.”

“I’m sorry, you _ worked in a Rose Video? _”

Patrick looks down at the floor bashfully, his hands in his pockets. “Yeah, yeah, it was the first job I ever had. Maybe it was fate.”

“Oh, wait, fuck!” David exclaims, his attention returning to the bottle of whiskey so that he doesn’t have to process what Patrick just said. “We don’t have any glasses!”

“We don’t need glasses, David, we can just drink out of the bottle!”

“That’s _ disgusting!” _

Patrick wonders if David also found it disgusting when the two of them kissed, but he knows it’s not a good idea to ask, so instead he says, “Think about it this way, David. We’ve kissed before, so sharing a drink really isn’t that big of a deal. But if it’s a big deal for you, you can go right ahead and go back out there and find us some glasses.”

David takes a deep breath and says, “Well, I suppose you don’t have a sloppy mouth, so it will have to do.” He takes a swig and then holds it out for Patrick.

“No thanks, your mouth is sloppy.”

David’s eyes widen and he makes an indignant noise, and Patrick chuckles and takes the bottle and a sip. “I’m kidding, David. You have a very clean mouth.”

David huffs in mock annoyance. “I would’ve thought you’d remember that if you seem to remember all the other details.”

“Maybe you should remind me,” Patrick says before he can think about what he’s saying. David stares at him. Patrick stares back. It’s too late to go back on that now.

David’s maybe getting closer and maybe it’s a sign of too much alcohol but they do need to practice anyway—

“We have a _ huge _problem,” Stevie’s voice interrupts, and everything comes to a screeching halt.

“We’re kind of busy, Stevie,” Patrick says gently as he can, trying and failing not to let his annoyance show through, and David makes no attempt at all to hide it when he tells her to go back to the hell she came from.

“Yeah, you can fuck each other later,” Stevie retorts. “Patrick, your parents are here.”

Patrick’s face goes white. “My parents?”

“Yeah.”

“Clint and Marcy Brewer?”

Stevie gives him a strange look. “How the fuck am I supposed to know what their names are?”

“Well, what the fuck are they doing here?” David yells.

Patrick downs a huge portion of the whiskey.

“If you thought I knew the answer to why they were here, don’t you think I’d have led with that?” Stevie shot back. 

“More importantly, _ how _ are they here?” Patrick asks to no one in particular. 

“I _ know _ you don’t expect me to answer that one. Come on, they’re looking for you two!” Stevie says, ushering them out of Johnny’s office. “You two just _ had _ to hide in the furthest place from the party, didn’t you?”

“Well _ yeah _, Stevie, that was kinda the point,” David says as the three of them head back to the living room, where the bulk of the partygoers are. 

David tries very hard not to panic. He had not anticipated to be meeting Patrick’s parents this soon and he feels very ambushed and on-edge. Patrick is such a sweet, good, nice person, and he’s just not. His parents would surely want better for their son. 

He stops in the middle of the hallway and tries to regain his breath, but he’s struggling. Patrick turns around and realizes he’s not with them, and goes back to be with him. 

“Go on without me, Patrick. I just need a minute. Stevie can keep me company.”

“Oh, is that what I can do?” Stevie asks sarcastically, and then turns her attention. “Don’t worry, Patrick, I know how to handle him.”

“_ Handle _me? Am I a broom now?”

“See? He’s already doing better!”

Patrick hesitates, but does as she says, and soon enough, he finds his parents.

His dad is looking at his hand with a look Patrick can’t quite place on his face, and then Patrick looks down and realizes he’s still carrying the opened bottle of whiskey.

“I know what this looks like, but I promise I don’t have a problem,” Patrick says, trying to make a joke. 

His dad merely nods, a hint of an amused grin etching on his face, and then his mom is pulling him into a hug. 

“Where’s your David?” she asks, eagerly looking around as if hoping he’s right behind him. 

“He just had to take care of something quickly, but he’ll join us soon.”

He chats with his parents for only a couple of minutes before Stevie and David join them. Patrick whispers to Stevie so his parents can’t hear, “Is everything okay?” and Stevie just does the thumbs up gesture.

As soon as David stands next to Patrick, Marcy steps forward to hug him. 

“Oh,” Davids says, surprised. His family has never really been a particularly huggy bunch and so it caught him off guard. Should he wrap his arms around her, should he pat her on the back? He ends up doing a half-pat, half-wrap thing with his arms and he glares at Stevie as he hears her snickering at him. 

“We’re so thrilled to finally meet you!” Marcy says as Clint nods. The hug ends and Clint outstretches his hand for David to shake. David knows a firm handshake is a good way to make a good first impression, but he’s so nervous, he’s afraid it didn’t quite come across how he intended it to. If it bothered Clint, he didn’t show it, and he tries to reassure himself that everything’s going to be okay. He’s not entirely successful. 

Marcy looks at Stevie and smiles. “And who is this? We spoke briefly before, but I didn’t catch your name.” 

“That’s my friend, Stevie! Stevie, this is my mom and dad!”

Stevie smiles awkwardly and says, “It’s nice to meet you, Mr. and Mrs. Brewer. I’m sorry to have to excuse myself so early on, but I seem to have misplaced my girlfriend.” 

Marcy’s eyes lit up. “Your girlfriend? Oh, I’d just love to meet her!”

“I can bring her over once I find her,” she says and then promptly excuses herself in search of Cassie. 

Once Stevie leaves, Marcy returns her attention to David and says, “I’m just so excited about your marriage! Congratulations! And thank you for marrying our son!”

“_Mom!_” Patrick moans at the same time Clint says, “Marcy!” warningly. 

“You make it sound like he gave you six goats for me.”

“Being married to your son is my pleasure,” he cringes internally, knowing what that probably sounds like. He continues, flustered, “But he makes it so easy. He’s darling.”

_ Darling? He just called Patrick “darling?” Ugh, _he thinks, hoping everyone will just move on and not draw attention to that.

He speaks again, knowing he’ll probably regret how rambly and embarrassing he’s being later when he’s alone and most likely being kept up by his incessant, pestering thoughts. If he had been warned beforehand he would be meeting Patrick’s parents, he wouldn’t have had nearly as much as he had this evening to drink. He would be giving his father a stern talking-to later. “As for the goat thing, I would’ve given you a lot better than _ goats! _ He’s worth way more than that to me.”

Marcy’s eyes widen at this statement and she “awws” at them. This is, of course, the moment Stevie and Cassie appear and Stevie asks, “What did we miss?”

“Oh, David was just telling us all about how much he _ loves _ our Patrick.” 

Patrick, who had been taking a sip of the drink Stevie had brought him in exchange for the whiskey bottle, sputters, coughing from choking on his drink. Stevie claps him on the back with a completely deadpan expression and David, Marcy, and Clint all look at him, concerned. 

“Are you okay, Patrick?” Clint asks.

Patrick nods, trying to regain his ability to talk. “ ’m fine,” he chokes out. “That drink just went down the wrong way.”

“So, David was giving another of his ‘I love Patrick’ speeches, huh? Silly guy, he’s _ always _ doing that,” Stevie says, delightedly grinning at David while he just glares back at her. 

Patrick’s mind is whirling. Could David feel the same way as him? Is there a chance? Is that what he and Stevie had talked about in the hallway? No, he decided, Stevie’s obviously just using this as a chance to mess with the both of them. David couldn’t possibly feel the same way about him and he wasn’t going to let himself hope that only to be crushed later. 

Marcy giggles at Stevie’s statement and then spots Cassie and says, “Oh, how rude of me! I don’t believe we’ve met yet.”

“Mrs. Brewer, this is Cassie, my girlfriend,” Stevie says, gesturing at Cassie who smiles brightly.

“Call me, Marcy, dear. That goes for all of you. You all feel like family to me already! Well, David, you are, of course!”

Marcy entwines her arms with Stevie’s right and Cassie’s left and says as she walks, “Let’s go find a place to talk. Tell me more about these love speeches, hmm?”

Clint, David, and Patrick are now alone and staring at each other. Patrick protests, “You’re really gonna just let her steal my friends away like that?”

“Patrick, your mother and I have been married for thirty years, and you, of all people, should know I don’t _ let _ her do anything. She and I are our own people and she’s a free spirit. What’s the worst that could happen?”

David’s eyebrows shot up and he shot Patrick a panicked look. 

“Does she still keep a collection of my baby photos on her phone? Because _ that _. That’s the worst that could happen!”

Clint just laughs as David says, “As your husband, I feel it’s only fair that _ I _ see these photos as well. I mean, I am absolutely, one hundred percent, wholeheartedly _ not _ a fan of babies in general, but, umm, _ you _ as a baby definitely interests me.”

David doesn’t know Clint so he’s not sure if that was the wisest thing for him to say and he half-expects to hear the typical “you’ll change your mind when it’s your own child” speech, but it never comes. David starts to let his guard down a tiny bit, well, a tiny bit more than the alcohol in his system had already. The thought crosses his mind that he could get used to having Clint and Marcy as his in-laws, but then his stomach sinks. _ This isn’t real. Patrick isn’t yours and they aren’t actually your in-laws. _

He would deny it if asked, but as much as he truly loves his own family, there’s something about the Brewers that he’s drawn to. Even though he hasn’t known Patrick all that long, he can tell that these are his parents and he wants to tell them how much their son has done for him, how sweet, and reassuring he is, but then their cover would be blown, and the press would have a field day and-_ they’d be so upset _ , he thinks. _ All of them. Clint and Marcy, his own parents, they all would hate him. And then Patrick would hate him. _So he keeps his mouth shut and just clings to Patrick as he and his father have a discussion about the sports.

The rest of the night goes by without any major hiccups. David, unfortunately, doesn’t get to see any baby photos of Patrick, but Marcy assures him he would “next time”. The party winds down and Stevie and Cassie head to their bedroom. Patrick indicates to David that he, too, would like to head to bed, and asks, “Are you coming as well?” to which David replies, “I’ll be up in a little bit. I just have something I need to take care of first.” Patrick smiles at him and then heads to their room, and David goes to find his father.

“Oh, David! Did you have a good time?”

“Yes, it was lovely,” he says snappily, although he actually does mean it. “It would have been a lot better if you hadn’t _ ambushed _ us with Clint and Marcy Brewer though!”

“Well, David, it’s their son’s wedding party too! What did you want me to do, not invite them?”

“No, but you could have _ warned _ us they were coming! How did you even find them anyway?”

“Well, David, there’s this handy thing called a phone book! I know you kids nowadays use your cellphones and your tweeters and such, but some of us still refer to those more old-fashioned type inventions.”

“_Okay, _but how did you know where to look? And how did you know those would be his parents?”

Johnny looks at him, a semi-guilty expression on his face, and says, “Okay, you got me! I didn’t use a phonebook! When I saw the announcement that you had gotten married, I had a background check done on Patrick.”

David blinks rapidly, shock and anger etched upon his face. “You did WHAT?”

“You’ll be happy to know he’s clean!”

“No, NO, I’m _ not _ happy to hear that! I shouldn’t _ know _that! And neither should you! It’s a HUGE invasion of his privacy! I’d expect this kind of stuff from the tabloids, not from my father, although I don’t know why I’m so shocked.”

“What’s _ that _ supposed to mean?”

“If you recall, you were _ so _ concerned about a pre-nup so this little tidbit just fits right in with that.”

“David, you’re my son. I care about your wellbeing! I just want what’s best for you!”

“Digging through my _ husband’s _ background, trying to poke holes in a perfectly nice person, is _ not _ my idea of ‘wanting what’s best for me,’ ” David declares before storming off. 

He needs to try to calm down before he enters the bedroom. He doesn’t want Patrick to know why he’s so upset. Even though he hadn’t been the instigator of these things, he still feels like his father’s actions reflect badly on him and that Patrick will think he’s harboring these thoughts deep down inside as well. 

He takes a deep breath before turning the knob and walking inside. He sort of hopes Patrick is already asleep. _ No such luck. _He walks towards the bathroom as fast as he can, hoping to not engage with Patrick, but Patrick comes in the bathroom. He stares at his face while he begins his nightly skincare routine and asks, “Is everything okay?”

David pauses, looking at him briefly before resuming. “Yes, fine. Why wouldn’t it be?”

“I don’t know, you just seem a bit,” Patrick stops talking, as if looking for the right word to describe how David had seemed. “Off.”

“I’m just tired, mostly. _ Exhausted _, actually, so if you don’t mind, I’d like to finish up all this,” he says gesturing at the counter laden with skincare products, “and then head directly to bed.”

“I’m here if you need to talk, David. Whatever’s bothering you, we can work through it together.”

“Okay, well, as I said, I’m fine, so that really won’t be necessary,” David declares definitively and Patrick nods sadly and leaves the room. 

The room is quiet, too quiet, as the two of them settle into bed to get some sleep. It is unknown by either of them that the other one cannot, instead being kept up by unrelenting thoughts. David’s of annoyance and anger at his father, and Patrick’s of what could possibly be upsetting David. 

***

When David wakes up, Patrick is gone, which, as he’s come to find out over the last couple of weeks, is not unusual for him. For a minute, he’s tempted to go back to sleep, but his phone dings and he assumes it’s either Stevie or Patrick, maybe even Cassie, wondering where he is. He grabs at his phone and his stomach sinks. It is none of the above and probably the last person he wants to hear from ever: Sebastien Raine.

After that initial text, David had hoped that would be the last time he heard from him, but sadly, it had not been. In between the first one, and the one he received just now, Sebastien had texted him two times, each more venomous and spiteful than the last. This text is no exception.

**[From Sebastien]**

When will your parents learn that they’re wasting an awful lot of their money on your marriage that will end sooner rather than later to that boring goody-two-shoes nobody who wouldn’t know a fashion sense if it hit him in the face? When you decide you’ve had your fill of poor or when he leaves you, I’ll be here to be your shoulder to cry on. Metaphorically, that is. You know how much my Peruvian wool sweaters cost me and I can’t get any of your gross salty tears on them.

He stumbles out of bed and into the bathroom to start his routine. After he completes it thoroughly to his liking, he wanders into the dining room and sees Patrick sitting at the table, staring intently at his laptop. He looks up when David comes into the room and says, “Good morning, David.”

“Morning. What are you up to?”

“Oh. Work stuff, it’s no big deal,” says Patrick as he closes his laptop.

“You know, for someone who’s supposed to be enjoying his ‘honeymoon,’ you’ve sure been doing a lot of ‘work stuff’ these past couple of weeks.”

“I’m sorry, it’s habit.”

“Bit of a workaholic, huh?”

“What? No, I—” Patrick stops, contemplating what he’s saying and then continues, “well, maybe. I guess I’d never really thought about it before, but I suppose I sort of am? Work was my go-to for when I was feeling stressed in my personal life and, well—”

“You were always stressed in your personal life, I remember you talking about that, yes. But, consider this: your boss gave you that time off to enjoy yourself and so I think you should use the remainder of that time to _ actually _ enjoy yourself, Patrick. As I recall, you told me you’d never been to New York City before. Let me show you my city these next couple of weeks!”

_ It would be a good distraction from you-know-who _ , _ also _, David thinks. 

***

David is horrified to discover that Patrick has a list of places he wants to see in NYC as well and it consists of mostly tourist-y spots that he ordinarily wouldn’t be caught dead at. David reluctantly—very reluctantly—agrees to go with Patrick to some of the places he wants to go to, as long as he also gets to show Patrick some of his favorite places.

Throughout the two weeks, they do and see many things together. They see _ Wicked _ on Broadway, and David spends most of the performance watching Patrick’s face light up instead of watching the show, one of his favorites.

They go to the Big Gay Ice Cream Parlor and Patrick gets a good chuckle out of the name while simultaneously enjoying his delicious ice cream cone called Dorothy, made of vanilla soft serve with dulce de leche and Nilla wafers on top.

On Wednesday of the first week, Patrick gets a phone call while David is still asleep and he quietly sneaks out of their room to answer it.

“Hello?”

“Hi, is this Patrick Brewer?”

“Yes, this is. May I ask who I’m speaking to?”

“This is Michelle at the Midtown location of Del Prado Jewelers_ . _I’m just calling to let you know your order is ready for pickup.”

Patrick had been wondering when they were going to contact him about the other three rings he had purchased for David to match his set of silver ones. And now that they are ready, he’s a little nervous about having purchased them. Would David think he went way overboard with the four gold rings? Was it too much?

He went to go pick them up, but he decided to hold off on giving them to David, instead stowing them away in a drawer. He would wait for the right moment to give them to him. He would make it special. 

***

One of the places Patrick had insisted go on the itinerary is Ellen’s Stardust Diner and no matter how much begging and pleading David does for them to go somewhere, _ anywhere _ else, Patrick wins the argument, stating they had had a deal, with a big old smirk on his face.

It’s crowded and noisy when the two of them get there, much to David’s chagrin, and there’s a long wait outside the building.

“Patrick, what do you want? I will give you literally anything if we can leave here and go eat somewhere else.”

“David, _ this _ is what I want. Come on, we spent all day yesterday at the Met and it was great, but we agreed that I would get to pick what we did today, and this is what I want to do!”

“Okay, but why, though? It’s overrated and tacky,” says David, cringing at he takes in their surroundings, standing in line and looking around 51st and Broadway. A man walks past the line talking to himself animatedly for the third time in five minutes.

“Why do you say that?”

“People getting up and singing all throughout the meal? It just seems uncomfortable and loud.”

“It’s just dinner, David, just a couple of hours, and then we can go, okay? Please? You told me you wanted to show me your city, and you’ve done a fantastic job so far, but this is part of your city and I want to see it.”

David sighs, kneading his knuckles into his forehead, as if he has a headache he’s trying to get rid of. “Fine.”

They get seated, finally, and order their food, and David softens up a bit when he notices just how much Patrick is enjoying himself, listening to the performances. A group of waiters and waitresses sing _ Welcome to the 60s _ from _ Hairspray, _ and then there’s a duet performance of _ A Whole New World _before they announce the donation bucket for acting classes. Patrick donates happily, and also doesn’t miss that David gives a good amount of money, although he tries to pretend he’s not doing it.

After a couple more performances, they started to have people in the crowd participate. During a performance of _ Hopelessly Devoted to You _, the performer comes up to Patrick and puts the microphone in his face and Patrick sings, 

_I know I’m just a fool who’s willing_   
_To sit around and wait for you_   
_ But baby can’t you see there’s nothing else for me to do  
I’m hopelessly devoted to you_

The whole time he’s singing, he’s looking at David, and David’s squirming, wanting to look away, but not being able to. The emotion Patrick puts into his verse almost brings David to tears, but then he remembers he’s in public and he clears his throat. The performer moves on and David yells over the music, “How did you just know the words?”

“I was actually in a production of _ Grease _ in high school. I played Danny, but I heard the show enough to just know all the parts eventually.”

David nods, because it’s too loud to have a full conversation, and the two of them continue eating and watching the performances. 

They leave after a full cast performance of _ Be Our Guest _ from _ Beauty and the Beast _, which feels like a grand finale, complete with multiple waitstaff brandishing pride flags and one waiter winking flirtily at Patrick and another at David.

When they’re leaving, Patrick turns to David and says, “Thank you for humoring me, David. I know you didn’t want to do that so thank you for going with me.”

“Well, you know me, always giving,” David says and Patrick laughs. He’d never admit it aloud to anyone, but he’d actually had a great time and it was all because of Patrick. He didn’t want to say that though because then he’d be admitting defeat, and it might go to Patrick’s head. 

***

David takes Patrick’s hand in his and Patrick asks, “Where are we going?”

“I’m not telling you. It’s a surprise. It’s my day to pick something, remember? But trust me, you’ll love this.”

They walk to the ball fields in Central Park and Patrick gasps. “What is all this?”

“It’s the Broadway Show League. Every Thursday during the summer they play a game. The teams are made up of cast members of various Broadway shows. I stumbled upon them playing a game a couple years ago when I was heading to the park to just sit and think for a while. There’s a spot under a tree near here that’s very nice and usually fairly quiet during the day, but that day, there were a lot of people around, which was pretty unusual. I don’t know how I had never heard of this, but somehow I hadn’t. I stuck around for a little bit, mostly to oogle at the players, admittedly.”

“How did you know I loved baseball?”

David blushed and looked away from him. “You _ may _ talk in your sleep sometimes and it _ may _include references to the sports on occasion. I remembered this and thought maybe you’d enjoy it.” He says it casually, as if it’s not a big deal. 

“David, this is incredible. Thank you for bringing me here! This is gonna be great.” 

When David is sure Patrick isn’t looking, he smiles a tiny smile, secretly pleased.

***

David has had such a wonderful time showing Patrick around the past two weeks. Admittedly, he’s sad Patrick’s time off is coming to an end, and he knows soon Patrick will have to go back to work and his life.

He feels like maybe they should talk about how to proceed, but Patrick hadn’t brought it up and he didn’t exactly want to be the first one to. It wouldn’t be the shortest marriage ever, it wouldn’t even be the shortest relationship he’d had, but it certainly was the best one.

And he had always known this was coming, it’s just that now that it’s almost here, he doesn’t want to part with Patrick.

***

David is surprised when he discovers Patrick still in bed when he wakes up that Friday morning. He figures he’ll go do what he has to do and then come back and try to wake Patrick up. The man hardly ever slept in, and, after all, everyone needs to every once in a while. 

He emerges from the bathroom forty-five minutes later and asks, “Are you ready for another exciting day in the city?”

Patrick groans in response. This worries David immensely. Had Patrick not had as good of a time as he had the last two weeks? He said he had, but he could’ve just been lying to not make him feel bad. 

David approaches the bed and gets a closer look at Patrick. He looks awful. He looks haggard, paler than normal, and appears shiny from sweat. 

“Patrick,” he says softly. “Are you okay?”

“I have a migraine, so I’m gonna have to pass on going out today. I’m sorry, David.”

David practically runs towards the windows and Patrick says, “Please don’t be mad. We can go some other time, I promise. Wait, what are you doing?”

As Patrick talks, David draws the curtains so that the once bright sunlight dims significantly. “Making it darker in here. Are you feeling nauseous at all? Do you need me to get you a bucket?”

“No, I’m not nauseous. I’m just feeling a little dizzy and of course, my head hurts, but that kind of comes with the territory.”

“Do you need me to bring you a water? Do you need me to get Cassie? She could maybe tell us the best thing to do for you.”

Patrick wants to cry—and not just from the pain he’s feeling— at how caring and considerate David is being. He questions again how David doesn’t see that about himself. 

“Water would be great. And I don’t think getting Cassie is necessary. I get migraines every once in a while. They usually last about a day or so and then I’m good. I just need to lay low for a bit. But thank you so much for the suggestion.”

David just nods and goes to get the water. “You gonna be okay here while I get the water?”

Patrick smiles. “Yes, David. I will.”

David returns with the water quickly and waits for Patrick to take a drink before setting it on the side table near Patrick’s side of the bed. David grabs a book and crawls into bed next to Patrick. 

“What are you doing?”

“Reading a book, Patrick,” David says, and then deciding to tease him a bit, he says, “Is your migraine causing you to not recognize books now?”

“No, I meant, like what are you doing in here? I know how much you were looking forward to going to Fifth Avenue today. You should still go. Don’t let me keep you.”

“Mhmm, it’s just that, part of the fun was going to be showing you around and you’re stuck here so I’m staying right here. Unless you want me to go?”

“No, you don’t have to go.”

“I just want to make sure you have everything you need.”

“You’re good at this.”

“At what?”

“Being a husband.”

Patrick’s feeling too terribly that for a minute he forgets to worry about having said too much. He also fails to notice how David half-smiles at this compliment. As soon as exactly what he said sinks in, he blurts out, “Even if it just a fake one,” to cover his tracks. 

David’s stomach sinks. _ Oh yeah, that’s all he’d be to Patrick: a fake husband. _“Well even in the category of fake husband, I need to be the absolute best,” he says, doing his best to laugh it off even though that fact hurts, especially considering all the thinking he’s been doing lately about how they’re most likely divorcing soon and he really, really doesn’t want to. 

It’s quiet for a while after that. Patrick tries to go back to sleep and David reads. It’s only when Patrick lets out a frustrated groan that David looks up. 

“What’s going on? Can I get you something?”

“No, I just can’t get back to sleep.”

“Well is there something I can do to help?”

Patrick thinks about this for a moment. “Well, when I was sick as a boy, I would curl up next to my mom and she would play with my hair and I’d fall asleep, but—”

“I can do that,” David blurts out and then grimaces. He hopes he didn’t come across overly eager. “I mean, I’m no Marcy Brewer, but that seems like something I can do.”

_ Thank god that you’re not Marcy Brewer _, Patrick thinks to himself. 

Patrick settles into David’s side, closing his eyes, as David runs his hands through Patrick’s hair. Such a gorgeous head of hair on an equally gorgeous man. When they had first met, Patrick’s hair had been pretty short, but he’d started noticing it getting longer and curling at the edges, and David was obsessed with how he looked like that. 

Eventually, he hears soft snores and looks down. Patrick, who had drifted off to sleep, looks so peaceful and adorable curled up into his side like this. David doesn’t want to move, fearful that even the tiniest movement will wake him, and he knows he needs as much rest as he can get. 

***

David stirs when he hears a knock at the door. He shakes his head, looking at his surroundings. He must’ve drifted off to sleep, but he doesn’t remember doing so. 

“Hel—” he starts, then clears his throat. “Hello?” he calls out. _ Much better _, he thinks. 

“David, what took you so long to answer? Were you and your adorable button face up to something in here,” Alexis asks, doing one of her typical “winks” which is really just her blinking. 

“How did you get in our apartment? Why does everyone just barge in here whenever they want? Shouldn’t you be off gallivanting with Stavros or something?”

“Oh, I made a copy of your key ages ago, David! And just the other day, I made one for your sweet little friend Stevie,” she says as if what she had just admitted is not a huge invasion of his privacy. “As for the Stavros comment, I told you, we’re both just taking some time to enjoy ourselves. Like, our relationship will be better when he comes back after he discovers himself or whatever.”

“Okay, well, what do you want?”

“Mom and Dad wanted me to tell you both that dinner is ready.”

“Ughhh, must we constantly be having these family dinners?”

“I know, right, it’s kinda weird. Dad’s been smiling, like a _ lot _ because of them. So, are you coming or what?”

“I’ll be up in a second, okay? Patrick’s not feeling well so I’ll bring his dinner to him here.”

“What’s wrong with him?”

“He has a migraine so quiet down, Alexis!”

“I haven’t even been here that long! If anything caused his migraine, it was being married to you, David.”

“Step on a pile of Legos, Alexis!”

David notices Patrick starting to wake up. He glares at Alexis and she sticks her tongue out at him and shuts the door. 

“Wha-what’s going on?” Patrick asks sleepily. 

“Alexis just came in here to tell us dinner is ready.”

“Okay,” Patricks says, as he begins to get out of the bed.

“What are you doing?”

Patrick looks up at him confusedly. “I’m getting up so we can go to dinner?”

“No, no, no! I’ll bring it to you!”

“David, I’m fine! Really! I’m feeling much better than earlier.”

“Mmk, that very well may be the case now, but just five minutes of being with them will bring your migraine right back so maybe you should just let me bring you dinner in bed tonight.”

Patrick couldn’t help but think David’s actions adorable. It’s clear David is not used to caring for someone like this and it seems important to him so he acquieses. 

“Thank you, David. That’s very sweet of you.”

—

David comes back about ten minutes later, having enlisted the help of Stevie. The two of them wheel in a cart with a serving tray on it. Patrick smiles, trying to conceal his laughter at the sight of the two of them. Stevie looks at him and notices his almost laughter. 

“Hello, Patrick. You look well. For a man on his deathbed. Or at least, that’s what I assumed you’d look like based on how David described you.” 

“David exaggerates. You know this, Stevie. I just had a migraine, but please, allow me to help.”

David shoots him a death glare. “Do not even think about getting out of that bed, Patrick.”

Stevie raises her eyebrows, grinning at him, and popping a bacon-wrapped, goat-cheese-filled date into her mouth. “You heard him, Patrick. Don’t even think about it.”

Patrick puts his hands up, as if to show he’s not gonna put up a fight, and then together David and Stevie lower a tray onto his lap. 

“Stevie, can you help me with my tray?”

“What do I look like? Your maid? Next you’re gonna demand I bring you towels or something.” 

“You helped me with Patrick’s!”

“Yeah, well, he’s sickly. Also, I just like him more than you.”

“Wow, _ okay _, this is the last time I ask you for anything!”

“Can I get that in writing?”

Stevie leaves David to struggle with his tray and says to Patrick on her way out, “Good luck with this one. He’s a real catch.”

David sets the tray back down on the cart and says, “Oh, before I forget! Do you want to watch a movie? We have practically any movie you could think of.”

“I don’t have a preference, so you can just put on any movie you want, David.”

David pops in _ The Proposal _and settles onto the bed next to Patrick. He chooses to just wheel the cart next to the bed instead of trying to get his tray into his lap. 

Patrick can’t help but notice the similarities between Margaret Tate and Andrew Paxton’s situation and his and David’s. He feels a bit like Margaret Tate, thrown into David’s family, trying to convince them that everything between himself and David is real, however, he seems to have an easier time of that than she does considering everything _ is _real, for him at least. 

He realizes, though, that his situation is also unlike this movie. They, most likely, won’t get a happy ending, just a _ really _strange story out of the whole ordeal. But Patrick knew that when he suggested this for them, and he has to accept that. 

***

David can’t sleep. It’s not for a lack of trying, his thoughts are just unrelenting. The month Patrick was given off is almost up and David is paralyzed with fear thinking about how Patrick will have to go back to work, and therefore leave New York, and how they’ll have to get the divorce papers signed, and how the best relationship of his life isn’t even real, but is still the best thing he’s ever endured. 

He takes a deep breath, willing his mind to shut up, and for sleep to overcome him, but instead, he hears Patrick quietly ask, “David? Are you okay?”

“Huh? Oh, did I wake you? Damn it, I—”

Patrick turns on his side lamp, trying to get a good look at David’s face. He looks as freaked out as he had sounded.

“David,” he says concernedly. “What’s going on?”

“We need to get a lawyer.”

“I’m sorry?”

“Your time off is almost up. You’ll be leaving soon. Do you have a ticket yet? I can book you a ticket! I can call the lawyer first thing in the morning and have them draw up the papers. I’m sure you’ll be relieved. This must have been the longest month of your life, huh?”

“Woah, woah, slow down, David! What are you talking about?”

“Your job. Your life. You’ve got to get back to it all. I can’t keep you from it anymore.”

“David, you’re not keeping me from anything! Where is this coming from? I told you when I agreed to come with you to New York that you weren’t holding me back from anything. I wasn’t lying.” Patrick sighs. “I should have just told you. Maybe you wouldn’t be freaking out right now if I just had.”

“T-told me?” David’s voice squeaks out at an octave higher than usual. “Told me what?”

Patrick takes a deep breath and then looks at him. “I quit my job, David. That’s what I had been doing before you told me to stop working so hard. I was looking for jobs here.”

David sits up in their bed, trying to wrap his head around this news. “You did what? Why, why would you do that?”

“Well,” Patrick says, looking right at him, “I’ve decided I rather like New York.” He figures this is the safer thing to say than what he wants to say, his real reason for staying, which is, of course, that he rather likes his husband.

***

_ A couple of days later _

Patrick’s technically the only Rose in the apartment building this morning. Each member of the Rose family has a prior obligation, David’s being that he finally returned to working at his gallery, after taking all that time off for “marriage stuff” as he called it. Even Stevie and Cassie are off sight-seeing. Patrick feels weird being alone. It’s too quiet since he’s now used to all the shenanigans that ensue whenever the Roses are around. 

His phone rings and he sees that it’s his dad. 

“Hey, Dad, how are you?”

“I’m—well, Patrick, have you seen the news this morning?”

“No, I haven’t. What’s going on?”

“You haven’t spoken to anyone about your marriage, right? Like press people?”

“No, David and I agreed we weren’t going to talk to anyone. The only time I did was that one time that guy really bothered me, but since then, I’ve gotten really good at ignoring them and blocking them out.”

“Well, there’s some guy on the TV claiming he’s got ‘the scoop’ on your wedding. You didn’t tell anyone else the truth about you two, did you?”

“No, the only people who know are myself, David, Stevie, Cassie, and you and Mom. And I’m sure whoever married us.”

“Well, you might want to check this out then. Figure out what this guy knows.”

“Thanks for telling me, Dad. I have nothing planned for today, so I’ll get right on this.”

As soon as he hangs up with his Dad, he calls David.

“Hey, David. Sorry to bother you while you’re at work, but uh, we’ve got a problem.”

“What’s going on?”

“Some guy on the news is claiming to have _ the scoop _ on our wedding.”

“It’s probably all a hoax, Patrick. People do this sort of stuff all the time to try to get their 15 minutes of fame.”

As he was talking to David, Patrick turned on the news. “Would they really be bragging about having _ the exclusive gossip _ if it was a hoax? This guy is claiming he was there, David, and whatever he’s told these people must be good enough for them to be advertising that.”

“What? That’s ridiculous! Nobody was there except the four of us and whomever married us!” David exclaims. 

“How do you know that? Like what makes you so certain?”

David is silent on the other end of the line. “I’ll call you back, Patrick,” he says and then promptly hangs up. 

Patrick starts pacing, worrying about David. He’s probably panicking. _ Fuck, I probably shouldn’t have shared this news over the phone while he was at work. _

His phone rings again and he’s hoping it’s David. He is disappointed to see that it is not David, but rather, Cassie. 

Taking a deep breath, trying to seem calmer than he currently is, he answers. 

“Hey, Patrick! Stevie and I heard something you guys aren’t gonna like.”

“Is this about the exclusive?”

“Oh, so you’ve heard?”

“Yeah, my dad called me earlier and told me.”

“Oh I see. Stevie wanted to call David, but her phone service is wacky out here. We’re on our way back.”

“Oh, you both don’t have to miss out on your fun for this.”

“We know, but we want to help. We’re gonna stop by David’s gallery. We can strategize once we get to your place.” 

Once the four of them meet up at David and Patrick’s apartment, all of them seated in the dining room, David turns to Patrick and says,

“So tell me everything you know.”

Patrick fills them all in on what his dad told him on the phone and David’s on his phone, googling immediately. He finds the interview Patrick’s dad most likely had seen, and gasped.

“What? What is it?” Cassie asks.

“I know this guy. I _ dated _ this guy! His name is Brock Hayes. He’s a massive tool and he seemed only interested in dating me for the money and clout. Join the club, am I right,” he jokes, trying to make it seem like it wasn’t a big deal.

“Do you think he actually knows something?” Stevie asks. 

“I’m not sure. I think we should pay a visit to my dad’s lawyer’s office. See what can be done about this.”

Stevie beckons Cassie over with a subtle tilt of her head and the two of them sneak off into a different room. Stevie’s staring intently at her phone and Cassie asks, “Babe, what are you up to?”

“I think David’s idea to drag in lawyers is a dumb idea. Why pay lots of money to the big guys in suits when we could go straight to the source?”

“Meaning?”

“Meaning I found the fucker’s twitter and he tweeted recently that he’s near this area and we’re gonna go confront him.”

“Stevie, let’s not act too rashly. Maybe we should tell Patrick about this at least.”

“Nah. He’s too caught up in his feelings for David to agree to this, but that’s precisely why it needs to be done. They’re scared he’ll leak their secret so let’s scare _ him _ into not doing that.”

“How exactly do you plan on doing that?”

Stevie grins at her wickedly. “Come with me and you’ll see.”

While David and Patrick are distracted, talking to each other, Stevie and Cassie sneak out the front door. 

They hail a cab to get to the café he’s at and once they arrive, they take a look around until they spot him.

Stevie unbuttons her top two buttons on her plaid shirt and turns to Cassie. “How do I look?”

“You look sexy, as always, but what are you doing? I thought your plan was to intimidate him!”

“I’ve changed my mind. He seems more like the type who could be easily persuaded if I just show him a bit of _ these _.” Stevie grabs her boobs from underneath and hoists them up, lifting her eyebrows at the same time and smirking.

Stevie starts to walk towards him slowly, enticingly, or at least she hopes it comes across that way, and is about halfway to him when she trips over her own feet and falls down. Cassie has to hold back a laugh before hurrying to her side to make sure she’s okay. 

“Cass,” Stevie stage-whispers. “You’re gonna blow my cover! Stay back!”

Stevie gets up as gracefully as she can and continues her pseudo-seductive walk towards Brock. 

“Hey,” she murmurs casually when she’s close enough to him for him to hear her. “I couldn’t help but notice you’re sitting alone. Do you need some company?” She blinks her eyelids rapidly, hoping this will capture his attention. _ This is what women do in the movies and it seems to work. _ She realizes she should have thought this through, considering she’s not exactly _ great _ at flirting with men. 

“I’m not really interested in your company, but your wife’s on the other hand—”

“Oh, we’re not married,” Stevie says with a laugh, trying to brush his gross comment aside when really she just wants to reach out and choke this asshole.

“Are you sure about that?” Brock whips out his phone and shows her a photo of a marriage certificate and her stomach drops.

At this point, Cassie is at her side and asks, “What’s going on? Stevie?”

Brock shoves the photo in her face and Cassie looks at it, speechless.

“This is fake, obviously. You—you just edited David and Patrick’s with our names instead,” says Stevie, desperate for that to be the case, but knowing deep down it wasn’t. 

“Yeah, like I care enough to do that. I don’t even know you except for the fact that you officiated David’s drunken sham of a wedding and then got married yourself. Look, I know you two probably came here to try to stop me from going on the show and telling the world all about this, but you have nothing on me. It would seem, based on the way your wife there is reacting, that this news is quite the shock to you both. I’m guessing you have a lot to talk about. So nice try, I guess, but you lose. I win. And David Rose is going down!”

Stevie is so busy trying to hold herself back from getting an assault charge that she doesn’t realize Cassie is no longer beside her. She turns and sees her walking quickly away. Stevie calls out to her, but she doesn’t answer. She hails a cab and it drives away, leaving Stevie standing all alone. 

***

David and Patrick drive to Johnny’s attorney’s law firm and David requests a private meeting with Ruth Harper. The secretary informs him that Ruth is out of town, but if he needs to speak to someone immediately, another partner, Charles Townbright, is available and he hesitates, not knowing this person or having interacted with him before, but finally agrees to it, knowing their situation is rather time sensitive. 

“I _ understand _ that this firm works for my father, Charles, but I need you to not tell him about this visit, mmkay? This all is just very messy and I don’t need further scrutiny from him about this.”

“Well since you’re my client right now, the both of you, I cannot divulge anything you tell me to your father under attorney-client privilege, even if he were to ask me, so you don’t have to worry about that. Now, what can I help you with?”

David explains the situation, with Patrick sitting silently beside him, saying nothing, but putting his hand on David’s knee for comfort and solidarity. 

“So you two got drunkenly married in Vegas and this guy is threatening to leak that? Are you sure you don’t just want a divorce? Lots of people get drunkenly married in Vegas, it’s not like it’s a big deal. That’s one way to solve your problem and it would most likely be just as costly.”

Patrick’s stomach drops upon hearing this. Luckily, David jumps in and says, “No, Charles, we do not want a divorce. We just want you to keep this guy from being able to leak this information to the whole world. You know as well as I do that money is not an issue here. We will pay you whatever it takes. We’re doing this because, no, you know what? I don’t, we don’t, owe you any explanation for why we’re staying married. The way I see it, that’s none of your concern. Now, can you stop him from going on that talk show or not?”

Charles goes into a discussion about NDAs, which, of course, goes in one ear and out the other for David, but Patrick seems engaged and interested in what he has to say, so at least one of them will know what’s going on. 

Forty-five minutes later, they are walking out of Charles’s office feeling a lot less stressed than they had earlier in the day. 

“You’re going to explain all that to me in a way I can understand it, right?”

Patrick laughs and says, “Sure, David. While we’re out, why don’t we go to dinner?”

“See? This is why you’re my husband. You _ get _ me,” says David jokingly.

Patrick closes his eyes, breathing in slowly. He wonders how David can be so casual about all this to the point where he can joke about it. He wishes more than anything that David could see this the way he does, wishes David wanted him like he wants David. But he can’t forget he’s the one who chose this, suggested this, and he’d rather live with David pretending to want him than living with David not in the picture at all. 

“Oh, is that why? I thought it was too much whiskey,” he says, with a bit of a bite to it, but if David notices this, he doesn’t comment on it. 

***

“Cass? Cassie?” Stevie calls out. _ She has to be here. Her cab left way before I even found one. _

She opens the door to their apartment and sees Cassie sitting on the couch, her knees hugged to her chest and her head buried at the top of her knees. 

“Cass, I know it’s shocking about us being married, trust me, I’m shocked too, but—”

“Trust you? Trust you? How can I trust you when you did what you did?”

“Did? You mean marrying you? Gee, thanks, I—”

“No, not that, we’ll get to that.”

“Then what the flying fuck are you talking about?”

“You knew you married them! He said it to you and you didn’t even flinch. How long have you remembered?”

Stevie took a deep breath. “Pretty much since the beginning. Not right away, but yeah, it was one of the first few things I remembered.”

“What on earth would possess you to keep that to yourself? You saw how freaked they were! They were scrounging for info, any little thing that could piece things together, and here I find out my girlfriend—sorry, do you prefer wife—knew this important piece of the puzzle the whole time?!”

“Cassie, you don’t understand.”

“Then enlighten me.”

“I’ve...never really had friends or anyone who wanted me to hang out with them. And I just, I don’t know! I felt so close with all of you, I didn’t want to ruin it.”

“Well, how do you think they’re gonna feel now? You’ve kept this from them for _ weeks _, Stevie!”

“What do you mean, how do you think they’re gonna feel? They’re not gonna find out!”

“Stevie, you _ have _ to tell them this! If you don’t, I will!”

It’s silent for a moment and then Cassie says quietly, “I just have to ask...did you know about us too then?”

"No! I had no idea that we also got married! I wouldn't keep that from you!"

"Oh, but you're fine keeping super important info from two people you claim are your really good friends?"

Stevie doesn’t get a chance to respond before Cassie’s opening the door, only to run into an enraged David and a calmer, but stern-looking Patrick. 

“Did you think I wouldn’t find out about this?” David starts in immediately. “I just got a DM from @therealbrockhayes saying ‘looking forward to embarrassing you on national television Saturday. Oh and tell your lesbian friends I say congrats, they’ll know what that means.’ What do you have to say for yourselves?”

“Uh, David, read the room. I think we’ve interrupted something,” Patrick says.

Cassie’s still standing at the door, arms crossed, with an equally stern look on her face, and Stevie’s looking down at her hands, trying to conceal the fact that a few tears had made their way down her cheeks.

Cassie clears her throat, getting Stevie’s attention. “Tell them,” she mouths and then she storms out the door. 

“What is going on?” David asks, clearly freaked out seeing Stevie like this. 

“David, I’m sorry for going to talk to that guy without telling you, but I really can’t take another lecture right now. Can we talk later? I, uh, I’ll explain everything then.”

“Fine,” David says. “Best wishes to you then.”

Stevie’s too upset to reply which worries David greatly. He pulls Patrick toward their place, intending to speculate with him about what could be wrong with Stevie and Cassie when they run into Johnny in the hallway. 

He seems angry and says, “I need to speak with Patrick right now.”

Both David and Patrick’s eyes go wide at the same time and Patrick says, “O-of course, Johnny. I’ll be right back,” he murmurs to David, kissing him on the cheek. 

Johnny’s eyes narrow at this display and he walks away briskly, Patrick hurrying to catch up with him. They get to his office and he sits down across from Johnny’s desk as Johnny shuts the door. Johnny takes his own seat and then says,

“I received an invoice from my attorney’s office today. Funny thing is, I don’t remember visiting my attorney today. But it seems like you and my son did. So what, you’re getting a divorce from my son? This is just about money, isn’t it? How much are you wanting anyway? I knew this was going to spell trouble.” 

It isn’t like this is the first time he’s heard Mr. Rose say stuff like this—having overheard past conversations Mr. Rose had had with David— and he knows he just has his son’s best interest at heart, but he can’t help, but feel a little hurt that Mr. Rose would accuse him of materialism and greed right to his face. 

“You have me misunderstood, Mr. Rose. I’m not in this for money, your son means everything to me. We are just having some trouble with a guy who’s trying to tell the whole world ‘the inside scoop’ on our wedding and that was a very personal, private night for us.” 

“OHHHH, well I can help you with that! I’m sure the lawyers have told you this, but we can get them to sign NDAs that we can threaten them with lawsuits of lots of money if they break.”

“That would be great, Mr. Rose.” 

“I’m sorry I misjudged you, Patrick.”

Eager to get back to David, Patrick shakes Johnny’s hand, assuring him everything is okay between them, and then he excuses himself and returns to their apartment. He opens the front door to discover David pacing. 

“David?”

“She said we would talk later, but I’m just worried about her. It seems like she and Cassie had a fight.”

“I think we should just respect their space right now, David. It’s okay to be worried, but I don’t think we should pry.”

“Would you at least go check on Cassie? Make sure she’s doing okay? It’s not that I don’t care about her, it’s just, well, I want to keep myself available if Stevie needs to talk.”

“Sure, David. I’ll be right back.”

Patrick isn’t quite sure where Cassie would have stormed off to, but it turns out, he doesn’t have to go far from the building, spotting her sitting at a coffee shop nearby through the window. She looks like she’s trying very hard not to cry in a very public setting. 

“Cassie,” he says her name gently, just to alert her to his presence. 

“Patrick,” she nods. “I, uh, I’d really like to be alone right now, if that’s okay.”

“Of course. I just wanted to check in and see if you’re alright. And if you need someone to talk to eventually, just text me.”

“Same to you,” she mutters and Patrick’s confused, but doesn’t say anything as he turns back to once again return to his and David’s apartment.

***

The following morning, David is about ready to head to the gallery for the day when his phone dings. Hoping against hope that it’s Stevie, he dives for it.

**[From Stevie]**

Can you and Patrick clear your schedules for tonight? I want to take you both to dinner and explain what’s been going on with me.

David promptly replies stating he will check with Patrick, but they would most likely be able to make that work. 

He texts Patrick and confirms that he is available and then tells Stevie as much. His day goes by slowly, his thoughts preoccupied with what Cassie and Stevie could possibly be fighting about. In the month he has known the two, they have been practically inseparable and now all of a sudden they aren’t even speaking. He hopes it’s nothing too serious. 

His day finally ends and he runs home to change and grab Patrick to head to the restaurant where Stevie said she would meet them.

“So,” Stevie takes a deep breath once they’ve ordered their food, “you’re probably wondering why I’m doing this.”

“That thought did cross my mind, yes,” David snarks, and Patrick nudges him with his elbow.

Stevie takes a swig of her drink, looking down at the table. If David didn’t know any better, he’d say she looked almost nervous which wasn’t a look he had ever seen on her before. What could she possibly have to say to them that she would be nervous about? 

“So, uh, this is actually a really funny story. We’ll all have a good laugh about it someday.”

“Why do I get the feeling that this isn’t as funny as you evidently want us to think?” David asks, his voice with a slightly-hysterical edge to it. 

“So, umm,” Stevie laughs awkwardly. “Iwasactuallytheonetomarryyoutwo. Okay eat up!”

“I’m sorry, what was that? You spoke so quickly, I didn’t understand,” Patrick says. 

Stevie takes another big gulp of her drink, looking anywhere but directly at the two of them and murmurs, “You wondered once who would marry two people who were that wasted, well, turns out, the answer is a third wasted person.”

“What does that mean exactly? Are we not actually married then?” Patrick asks. 

“I mean, you had two witnesses and I _ am _ ordained, so jury’s still out on that one, but I think so.”

“Okay, so you just remembered you married us, we can work with that. It’s actually a huge piece of the puzzle,” Patrick says. “Why were you so nervous to tell us that?”

Stevie looks up guiltily and David says, firmly, venom dripping from every word, “Because she didn’t _ just _ remember, Patrick, she’s known this whole goddamn time, I can see it on her face.”

David gets up without another word and storms out of the restaurant. Patrick shoots Stevie an apologetic look and says, “We’ll talk about this more later,” and then follows after him.

“Went as well as it could have,” Stevie says, resigned, left alone at the table and lifting her glass up in a toast to no one.

***

David turns around to discover Patrick trailing behind him. “How are you so calm about this?”

“She’s our friend, David.”

David starts pacing back and forth in front of the restaurant. He’s sure he looks like a madman, but for New York City, he’s probably not the maddest roaming the streets at this time. “She _ kept _ this from us, Patrick! This whole time, we were looking for answers! I blamed _ myself _for this!”

Patrick reaches his hands out to attempt to calm him, but David bats them away. He replies calmly, “She didn’t force us into this, she was drunk too.”

“But clearly not as much as we were to _ remember _doing it!”

“You didn’t let her talk, David, you just stormed out. You’re casting assumptions on her and that’s not fair.”

“No, what’s not _ fair _ , Patrick, is finding out someone you thought was your friend _ lied _to you. She was someone I thought I could trust, but I guess they all fail me in the end.” He storms off, not even giving Patrick time to respond. And Patrick just lets him go, knowing he needs his space, but also wondering if David thinks that he too, will fail him. 

He takes a cab back home and runs into Cassie. Literally. He helps her up and she takes one look at him and says, “She told you, didn’t she?”

“Is it that obvious?”

“Just you by yourself, no, but I saw David come back a little bit ago and he looked upset.”

Cassie sits on the floor outside her apartment and Patrick sits beside her. 

“Are you doing okay?”

Patrick hesitates and then says quietly, “Is it bad that I’m not upset?”

“You feel whatever you feel, Patrick. Emotions aren’t bad inherently, it’s what you do with them that could lead to badness.”

“Are you sure you wanna be a nurse? You’d do well as a counselor.”

“Surprisingly, that’s not the first time I’ve heard that, but this isn’t about my chosen career path, this is about you. Do you want to talk about it?”

“I’ve never felt this way before, Cassie, about anyone. I’m not mad at Stevie because she brought you all into my life. I was feeling trapped in my life before. Boring job, a fiance I just couldn’t make things work with, and all these questions about why I had the perfect life on paper, but was still so damn miserable. And it’s because of Stevie that I got to know David better, and I got to have you two as my really good friends.”

“Does he know how you feel about him? That this is real to you?”

Patrick sighs. “You know I can’t tell him that. He doesn’t love me back.”

As soon as the words leave his mouth, a strange wave of calm comes over him, and he realizes it’s the first time he’s actually admitted he loves David out loud.

“You finally admitted it!” Cassie exclaims, having realized at the same time he did. “That’s the first step!”

“That’s the _ only _ step. I’m serious. I can’t tell him.”

“And why on earth not?”

"He's_ DAVID ROSE _! He doesn't go for people like me. He deserves someone more—" she cuts him off before he can finish that sentence. 

"More what? More kind? More loving? More adoring of him? Cuz he can't find that."

Patrick says nothing for a while, but then says, “What about you? Are you doing okay? You seemed really upset yesterday.”

Cassie laughs a humorless laugh and says, “I guess in some regard it all seems like karma for what she did? Although, I don’t know what I did to deserve it.”

Patrick looks at her confusedly. “I’m sorry, what are you talking about?”

“Did she not tell you everything?”

“Well, in her defense, David stormed out and didn’t exactly give her a chance to.”

“Oh, I see. So yeah, I was mainly upset at her for knowing this whole time and not telling you, but we _ did _ find something else out yesterday that’s pretty shocking.”

“Oh?” Patrick asks, not wanting to pry. 

“When we went to go try to talk to that guy, he showed us, umm, well, a marriage certificate.”

“Okay?” Patrick says, not really sure why this would be shocking to them, considering the circumstances. 

“It, umm, well, it wasn’t yours.”

It takes him a minute, but he figures it out and his eyes go wide. 

“What? You guys got married too? But who—?”

“I don’t know any details. She claims she didn’t know about that part.”

“Do you believe her?”

“I do, Patrick. I do believe her, and I’m glad you’re not upset with her, but I am. I don’t see how she could have kept this big secret from you guys, from me, this whole time.”

“That’s understandable. Do you, umm, do you need anything?”

“Nah, I should let you get back to your husband,” she says cheekily.

Patrick rolls his eyes. “Good night, Cassie.”

“Good night, Patrick.”

Patrick walks into their apartment and enters their bedroom. The lights are off and David is most likely asleep already. Patrick sighs. It isn’t unexpected, but he is a little disappointed. He quietly changes into his pajamas and goes into the bathroom. He pads over to the bed, and slips into it, careful not to jostle the bed too much in order to not wake up David. 

He lays on his side facing the wall, away from David, and tries to quiet his mind, but doesn’t have to do that for too long before the bed shifts and David is wrapping Patrick up in his arms in a sort of sideways hug. 

Patrick is confused, thinking maybe David is moving in his sleep, but then David speaks, “I shouldn’t have yelled at you earlier. That was wrong of me. I thought about what you said and I’m willing to listen to the full story.”

Patrick just murmurs, “Thank you, David,” and then eventually David falls asleep, arms still curled around Patrick. He relishes the feeling of it. He thinks back on what Cassie said. He’s still not convinced. David will discover in due time that Patrick isn’t what he wants, he’ll ask for the divorce, and then Patrick will go elsewhere. Alone.

***

“I just want to know why, Stevie. Why did you keep this from us for so long? You saw us that morning. We were panicked, we were frantic. If you had just told us then, sure, it wouldn’t have been easy to hear, but it would have been okay. The only reason I’m upset is because you sat on this for weeks!” David exclaims and Patrick just sits calmly beside him, ready to jump in the conversation if things get heated, but ready to listen to what Stevie has to say.

“I thought you’d never speak to me again if I told you! It’s like you said, I saw you both that morning and you _ were _ freaked out and I didn’t want to make things worse. I know I shouldn’t have kept this from you, I was just scared you’d kick me out and I’d never get a chance to talk to you, either of you, again. It’s, I don’t know, it’s hard to explain, but I just felt this closeness to you two. And Cassie, of course,” she murmurs that last part quieter than the rest of her speech. 

David heaves a loud, exaggerated sigh. “Okay,” he says. “I guess I can understand that.”

Stevie’s face brightens just a little, in a small, almost bashful smile, albeit with her head tilted down. “Thanks, David.”

“Speaking of Cassie,” asks David, playfully nudging her arm in a sudden tonal shift, “have you spoken to her?”

“No, she won’t answer my calls or texts. I’ve been sleeping in the guest bedroom in the apartment.”

“Well, have you considered getting her flowers or chocolates?”

“No, she’s allergic to pollen, and chocolates don’t seem sufficient for what I did.”

“Well, what does she enjoy doing? And before, you answer with ‘me,’ consider not saying that, and instead think of something you could do _ for _her to see if maybe she’ll talk to you.”

Stevie contemplates this and then grins widely. “I think I know what to do! But before I go, are we cool?”

“Yes, we’re cool, but don’t ever lie to me again!” David says as Patrick just smiles and nods. 

“Alright, time to go win her back!”

***

She had spent all afternoon gathering everything she would need to make this surprise for Cassie perfect. She’s anxious for Cassie to get back to the apartment after running some errands. She hears the door and calls out, “Cass, can you come in here a sec?”

She hears Cassie sigh, but approach the bedroom. She looks around, confused, “Uh, Stevie? Where are you?”

“In here,” Stevie calls from the bathroom. 

As soon as she gets to the door, she gasps.

“What’s all this?”

The lights are dim and candles are all over. Soft music is playing in the background. 

So take from me,  
What you want, what you need  
_ Take from me, whatever you want, whatever you need  
_But lover, please stay with me

Stevie starts running the water for the bathtub and drops a bath bomb in, as she says, “I didn’t know what time you’d be home, so I wanted to make sure the water was warm enough for you.”

“Is that from Lush?”

“Yeah, it’s Snow Fairy. I remember you telling me once that was your favorite.” She sees Cassie just standing there and continues, teasingly, “Come in, come in. Stay a while.”

Cassie removes her clothes and gets into the bathtub, closing her eyes, breathing in the scent. “This is so nice, Stevie.”

“I just want you to relax,” Stevie murmurs in her ear and she shivers. “Let me take care of you.” 

Stevie lays her hands gently on Cassie’s shoulders, massaging them. Cassie leans back into her touch. 

“You’re not going to join me?” Cassie asks, voice low and inviting. 

“I, uh, just wanted to make this about you,” Stevie says, her hands continuing to caress her lover. “I’m really sorry, Cassie.”

“I know you are, Stevie. Did you talk to them?”

“I did, yes.”

“And?”

“Round two went better than round one, but things seem okay now.”

“That’s good.”

It was quiet. Stevie’s hands stilled; she felt nervous and anxious and a whole mess of emotion which she didn’t exactly know how to deal with. 

Cassie sighs. “I don’t want to fight anymore, Stevie. But you understand why I was upset, right?” At this point, Stevie comes to stand in front of her, wanting to see her face when they have this conversation. 

Stevie clears her throat, trying to keep her voice steady and hide the fact that she’s tearing up. “Of course I do. And you had every right to be upset with me. I should never have kept that secret. You three mean more to me than anyone else ever has. I didn’t want to lose you.”

“Well, you’re going to lose me if you don’t get in this tub with me right this instant,” Cassie replies and Stevie smiles at her before taking off her robe, revealing the black lacy lingerie she’s wearing underneath it. “On second thought,” she says, pausing, and Stevie freezes, “maybe I should get out of this tub so I can remove that lingerie myself and have my way with you.”

“A-anything you want, Cassie,” Stevie stutters, pupils blown wide open as she watches Cassie get out of the bathtub, wrap a towel around herself, and approach her. She pouts at the addition of the towel, and Cassie says, “Well, I didn’t want to get you all wet.”

Stevie smirks and says, “It’s a little late for that.”

Cassie kisses her passionately, urgently, as if it had been lifetimes since last doing so. She moves forward, as Stevie moves backward towards the bedroom and, subsequently, the bed. They arrive at the bed and Stevie falls backwards onto it, all the while still kissing Cassie. 

They break apart, to catch their breath, as Cassie crawls on top of Stevie, straddling her. She kisses her neck while unhooking her bra, Stevie gasping and panting as she does so. 

“Cass, I—”

“What is it? Is something wrong?” Cassie stops what she’s doing to look at Stevie’s face. 

“No, it’s just, is there something in particular you want out of this?”

“I just want you, Stevie Budd, whatever way you’ll let me.”

“Then by all means, go ahead, I wouldn’t want to spoil your plans.” 

***

Saturday arrives and everyone couldn’t be more grateful for that fact. It is on that day that they receive word that the lawyers’ threats of lawsuits and massive fees scare Brock into giving a press conference and saying he made the whole thing up. Stevie pops popcorn and the entire Rose clan settle in front of the television in David and Patrick’s apartment to watch him declare that he is “truly sorry for making things up. There was never an exclusive. I was jealous of David’s new husband, and so I said it to try to get his attention. I failed and so here I am today, humbly asking you all to forgive me.”

“Fat chance, you wackadoodle!” Stevie cackles and throws popcorn at the screen. 

On top of accomplishing that, the lawyers also manage to obtain the marriage licenses from him. Both couples are entirely unsure what to do with said documents, but at least they are now in their possession. 

After the broadcast of the press conference is over, Alexis moves to leave the room when Johnny stops her. 

“Alexis, could you stick around for a moment, please? I want to take this opportunity with all of us sitting here together to tell you all that I would like to have a family dinner. All of us together. Next week, say, Monday night? Stevie, Cassie, that includes both of you! You’re family now too!”

Everyone nods their agreement, realizing that although they didn’t do it often, Johnny still liked to occasionally have these family dinners to create the appearance that they were a close family. The room clears, everyone headed off to their own apartments until it’s just David and Patrick sitting on the couch together. 

David gets up, announcing his need for a shower, and Patrick turns on the TV to Sports Center to catch the tail end of the baseball game he’s interested in. 

He pulls out his phone to turn on the other baseball game happening simultaneously, but discovers, to his dismay, that it is dead. He calls after David, who hadn’t gone too far.

“David, do you mind if I use your phone? Mine died and I want to turn on the game.”

David pops back in the room, looking confused. “But you have the baseball turned on already.”

“Right, but there’s another one on on a different channel and I want to watch both at once.”

David blinks at him rapidly, his confusion still evident, and Patrick says, “Never mind, it’s okay.”

David shakes his head. “Oh, oh right, yes, you can use my phone. Here,” he says, handing him the phone after unlocking it. “Have fun with the baseball.” he says and then leaves the room once again. 

Patrick goes to download the app, which he’s sure David will delete from his phone as soon as he gets his phone back tonight, and while he’s waiting, David gets a text. 

He knows he shouldn’t look, but he sees the name “Sebastien” and he feels like a bundle of nerves suddenly. Was David seeing someone else? Was this marriage thing going to end really soon and David just hadn’t gotten around to telling him yet? 

He knew it wasn’t real, that David owed him nothing, and could see whomever he wanted, it just would’ve been nice to know that that was what was happening before he found out this way. 

Of course, he thinks, it is a little foolish to hand over your phone so easily if you’re expecting a text from your secret lover on the side.

All too soon, he realizes none of that anxiety is warranted and instead the emotion he should be feeling is rage. 

This Sebastien guy, whomever he is, had sent a rather nasty text message that Patrick would prefer not to repeat. Clicking on the notification, of course, takes him to their text chain and the one-sided conversation that had been happening since the day they headed to New York City. 

Scrolling through the texts, Patrick feels sick and angry and he wants to throttle this Sebastien guy. Even without knowing who he is or what David’s -undeniable-history with him is like. 

Before he knows what he is doing, he presses call. It doesn’t ring very long before a nasally, snobby voice is purring, “I was wondering when you were gonna reach out and realize that we’re supposed to be together.”

“And your five horrible text messages to my husband were supposed to be your way of trying to win him back? You must be a real charmer.”

“I’m confused. You’re not David and yet David’s caller ID came up.”

“I have his phone, asshole. You need to leave David alone.”

“You seem on-edge; is David not taking care of you? Is it because you’re too uptight and controlling, sneaking on his phone like this?”

“I’m not sneaking on anything. He knows I have his phone. I borrowed it. Anyway, that doesn’t matter. I’m not asking you, I’m telling you. Leave. My. Husband. Alone. Or there _ will _be consequences.” Patrick says firmly and then hangs up. 

Patrick paces the room. He knows what he did probably crosses the line, but he couldn’t sit there and not do anything! When that creep has been harassing him! He knows he should’ve waited, should’ve asked David about it before acting rashly, but it was too late now. Now, he just has to wait for David to get out of the shower. 

David emerges and sees Patrick pacing, looking tense.

“Are they not winning the baseball?” he asks, trying to appear sympathetic.

“Huh? Oh, I don’t know to be honest. I got...distracted.”

“Oh? And what was it that could’ve possibly distracted you from the baseball?” David asks, teasingly, sitting on the couch and patting the seat beside him. 

Patrick sits and fidgets beside him, not looking at him. “Who’s Sebastien?” he asks quietly. 

“I beg your pardon?” David asks, voice lilting, a panicked expression on his face. 

“You, uh, got a text from him while you were in the bathroom. It, umm, well it wasn’t nice. And I know I shouldn’t have looked, and I’m sorry about that, but—”

David looks at his phone and sees Sebastien’s name in the outgoing calls. “You spoke to him?”

Patrick bows his head, ashamed, and says, “I did, but only to tell him to leave you alone.”

David sighs and looks away from him. “David, I’m sorry I upset you. I—”

“It’s not that, Patrick. I’m not upset about that.”

He was never supposed to find out about any of his exes, let alone the worst of them. He would just pity him, or look at him differently, and David didn’t want that at all. 

“Sebastien is my ex-boyfriend. One of many, many exes I’ve had. If you’re wondering why this topic has never come up with me, despite me knowing yours, well, it’s not exactly an easy topic, or my proudest moments.”

“You don’t have to tell me anything if you don’t want to, David. I only acted out of concern for you, nothing else, I promise.”

David, still avoiding his gaze, says, “This isn’t exactly a conversation I was prepared to have tonight or anytime soon. I just—”

Patrick reaches a hand out and puts it on his shoulder, rubbing soothingly. “David, hey, look at me.” 

David looks up, nervously, and Patrick continues, “You really don’t have to tell me anything, it’s okay. I just want to make sure you’re okay. Can I just ask one question though.”

David hesitates and then nods.

“Do you want me to block his number for you so he can’t bother you anymore?”

Again, David nods, and then he puts his head in his hands, groaning. He mumbles something unintelligible, and Patrick asks, “What did you say? I can’t understand you when you’re mumbling like that.”

“I said that you probably think I’m the world’s biggest idiot for not having done that before.”

Patrick looks at David and says, gently, “David, no, I could never think that about you.”

“I guess it just...never occurred to me that I could do that? That I didn’t have to endure his mean texts?”

“Well, that’s what I’m here for. To show you that you deserve better.” 

Patrick hopes David doesn’t notice the underlying implications of his statement, that by _ better _, he meant himself, but if he does notice, he doesn’t say anything except, “Thank you, Patrick.” and then just like that, the conversation is over, and David is insisting they watch a romantic comedy instead of sports. Patrick can’t help but give in, smiling to himself. He would give David the moon, if he asked.

***

Monday night arrives and everyone has gathered for the big family dinner, as Johnny had requested; well, everyone except Johnny, that is. 

“Ugh, where is he?” Alexis whines. “Klair and I were gonna go to the newest Prada launch party! And if he doesn’t get here soon, we’re gonna be _ way _ beyond fashionably late.”

Stevie and Cassie are playing footsie underneath the table, seeming completely unaware of their surroundings. David is on his phone, leaving Patrick to deal with a Moira meltdown about how because John hasn’t called, he MUST be dead in a ditch somewhere. 

Patrick does his best to assure her that most likely something just came up at the Rose Video location he’s at today, but eventually, he nudges David, hard, with his elbow. 

“What?” David exclaims.

“Little help here?” Patrick stage whispers. “She’s having a crisis and I don’t know how to calm her down.”

“Oh, just do what Alexis and I do and tune her out. She’ll get bored of that eventually.”

“David, I’m not just gonna tune your mother out! I need to do _ something _!”

David is saved from responding by his father and an unfamiliar man walking into the apartment. 

“John!” Moira shrieks, running into his arms. “You’re alive!”

“Well, of course I’m alive, Moira! We just had a situation I had to help take care of at the Brooklyn location of Rose Video. I called Alexis, but she didn’t answer.”

“I was in the middle of a bidding war for the Hermẻs Matte Niloticus Crocodile Birkin, I wasn’t just gonna drop everything and answer your call!”

David rolls his eyes and Patrick just sits there looking bewildered, but also amused. 

David notices Patrick’s eyes move and he follows his gaze to see what he’s looking at. Or rather, who he’s looking at. The man who had come in with Johnny is standing awkwardly near the door, looking unsure of what to do. The man clears his throat and Johnny turns to him.

“Oh, I’m so sorry, Theodore. Everyone, this is Dr. Theodore Mullens. He really came to my rescue today.”

“Doctor?!” Moira screams. “So you _ were _ in peril?!”

The man speaks up. “Umm, hi, sorry to interrupt, but it’s just Ted, actually, and I’m a veterinarian, so no, Mr. Rose, was not in any peril, don’t you worry a-_ bat _ it.”

Alexis, at this point, wanders up to Ted, and flips her hair and says, “Well, ‘just Ted,’ I am Alexis.”

“It’s lovely to meet you, Alexis,” Ted smiles.

“So wait, why’s he here?” David asks, seemingly bored.

Patrick nudges David again and David yells “ow!” and Patrick says, over-eagerly, if you were to ask David, “David, be polite! Hello, Ted, I am Patrick!”

“My _ husband _,” David spits out, pointedly. “I’m David, hi.”

Johnny says, “We had a cat give birth to kittens in the Brooklyn Rose Video and I didn’t know what to do so I called Ted here and he was able to make sure both mother and babies are doing okay and can find homes.”

“Ewww, _ inside _the store?!” David asks. 

“Yes, son, but everything’s okay, and there’s no major mess or anything.”

David shudders and Johnny continues, as if he hadn’t. “Anyway, I was so grateful for Ted here that I invited him back to our family dinner.”

Johnny takes his seat at the head of the table and Alexis, arm entwined with Ted’s says, “You can sit by me, since I’m all by myself over here. David has his button and Stevie and Cassie have each other.”

As if only just realizing something was happening around them, Stevie and Cassie look up, notice Ted, nod at him, and then resume being enraptured with each other. 

Dinner is served: fettuccine alfredo with chicken and broccoli, and Ted says, “Not loving this meal would be im-_ pasta _-bole.”

Everyone shoots each other looks except Alexis, who laughs and laughs and laughs, pushing Ted’s shoulder, and then booping his nose, saying, “You’re _ so _ funny, Ted.”

He grins back at her and David rolls his eyes. He doesn’t like this Ted character, and it’s not just because Patrick keeps staring at him, practically drooling, and even if it was because of that, there’s no proof, so. It’s undeniable that the man is attractive, but David finds that he can’t even enjoy the view because he’s too busy being insecure that Patrick will realize what he’s missing out on, and will leave, and then David will never see him again. 

He knows these thoughts are dangerous territory. Patrick isn’t _ his _ , not really. He can go off and do whatever, or whomever, he wants, but he really doesn’t want him to. But no one should have to be subjected to David Rose for the rest of their life. David knows this. And when faced with options, with a choice, no one has ever, would _ ever _ choose him over the greener grass. 

“Kids, while you’re all gathered here, I have an announcement.”

“If it’s for another family dinner, you don’t have to announce that every time. You can just text us,” Alexis says.

“No, Alexis, it’s not another family dinner. As you know, your mother’s birthday is coming up soon and so I wanted to let you all know I will be throwing a party for Moira’s birthday in a couple weeks.”

“Oh, John, how superfluous!”

“Now, now, sweetheart, I know you don’t want a big scene made.”

Everyone else in the room, besides Ted, who just looks confused, tries very hard not to laugh at that statement which Johnny somehow uttered completely seriously, to the point where it was hard to tell whether or not he actually was being serious. 

“Well, I suppose I shall just offer my humblest gratitude if you insist on throwing a shebang for teeny-weeny ol’ me,” Moira says, looking pleased. 

Alexis turns to look at Ted and says, “You should totally come as like my date or something.”

“Wow, it’s been like _ five _seconds since Dad announced this party and you met this guy like two seconds ago, how do you know he even wants to go with you?”

Alexis bristles. Ted holds his hand in hers and says, “I know I’m practically a stranger and that’s probably why you’re worried, big guy, but if she’ll have me, I’d love to go as her date to your mother’s party.”

David decides that he can back off Ted a tiny bit. He observes the way he looks at his sister as if she’s a person to be cherished and adored and loved and compares it to all the other jackasses she’s been with before, who have only looked at her with lust-filled glances or greedy, crooked smirks. Whatever jealousy he feels regarding Patrick washes away as Patrick takes his hand and kisses it, leaning into him. 

_ Patrick _. He knows this sweet man beside him is the reason he’s able to push aside a few of his instantly distrustful feelings about Ted. He almost feels a little dizzy at the realization that there are other seemingly well-intentioned and good-hearted people out there. Of course, the fear and distrust, and putting up walls isn’t completely done with. This experience has only just scratched the surface, but it’s a nice feeling nevertheless. 

Stevie, Cassie, David, and Patrick all get up after dinner to head to David and Patrick’s apartment where they had all previously agreed they would have a game night. On their way there, Stevie turns to Patrick, and says with a tone that’s aiming for casual teasing, “So, Ted seems nice, right?”

Patrick looks at her, eyes wide, face flushed, and says, “Hmm? Oh, yeah, I mean, we didn’t talk much, but yes, yeah, he does.”

“I bet that something’s you’d like to do more of with Ted, talking,” says Stevie, smirking, and David shoots daggers at her with his eyes. 

“Uh? I mean, I guess so? I hadn’t thought about it much to be honest.” At this point, Patrick seems confused and like Stevie is telling a joke that he’s not in on. “Did I...miss something?”

“No, nothing, it’s nothing, right, Stevie?” David asks sternly.

Patrick stops walking and says, “It doesn’t seem like nothing.” He crosses his arms. “What is going on?”

David and Stevie go silent and Cassie sighs, “You guys are gonna make me tell him, aren’t you? You just seemed, uh, _ into _ Ted.”

“What, whaddya mean?” Patrick asks.

“Well, you were staring at him quite a bit during dinner.”

“Oh god, oh god, why did no one tell me?”

“Because it would have been weird to be like ‘Patrick, stop thirsting over the hot vet’ at the dinner table?” Stevie chimes in. 

Patrick is starting to freak out. If they all noticed this, then did Johnny? He only just recently got Johnny to trust him after the whole “exclusive” debacle. And David seemed cold, distant. But he was just mad about Stevie teasing him, right? He couldn’t possibly be jealous, right? His thoughts were swimming and he had no idea what to make of this whole situation. 

Cassie, sensing his discomfort, and noting the awkward tension in the air, quickly changes the subject. “So, what game are we gonna play first?”

They get inside the apartment, still debating over which game to play, and Stevie pulls out a bottle of whiskey.

Patrick blinks rapidly and asks, “Where did that come from?” at the same time that David cries, “Stevie! How did you find my whiskey?”

“You need to do a better job of hiding your liquor, Rose.”

“I hid it so that this exact scenario _ wouldn’t _ happen!”

“Don’t ever underestimate me and my ability to sniff out alcohol ever again, David!” she says, wagging her finger at him. “That was your first mistake.”

“Ugh, you’re like one of those drug-finding dogs,” David complains.

“Thank you. I happen to love dogs, so I will take that as a compliment.”

Stevie pours a glass and offers it to Patrick, who gratefully accepts it. She pours another and offers it around, but both David and Cassie shake their heads. “David, you’re still keeping up this no drinking thing? What’s the worst that could happen? You’ve already drunkenly married someone.”

“I just don’t feel like drinking tonight, Stevie, now leave it at that!” David snaps. 

“Okay, fine, more for us, right, Patrick?”

Patrick quickly downs his drink and Stevie pours him another. David still seems really upset and he wonders if Stevie’s teasing is actually getting to him instead of just being for fun.

“I’m surprised you didn’t invite Alexis and Ted to this game night, David. Didn’t you once rant for thirty minutes about how ‘six is the ideal number for game play?’ ”

“Can we just start playing something, please? Thanks so much.”

Cassie reaches for Uno and says, “We could play this. Is that alright with everyone?”

“Sure,” says Patrick as Stevie shrugs, and David says nothing.

***

Patrick is starting to think game night was a bad idea. David clearly is not having a good time, upset about what Patrick can only guess, Stevie just will not let up on teasing David about anything and everything and with her drinking it only gets worse, and Cassie is trying desperately to get them all to focus on the game, but Patrick is starting to reach a buzzed state which is making it really really hard to focus on the cards. Literally. Everything is blurry.

Patrick is staring off into space, at nothing in particular, and Stevie says, “Patrick, are you too busy thinking about Ted to realize it’s your turn?” She giggles and takes another drink and David tenses. He stands up and storms off, and Patrick stands up to go after him, but has to sit back down immediately because he’s very dizzy. 

Cassie lectures Stevie. “Babe, you took it too far.”

“It’s fun! We’re all just having a good time!”

“No, I don’t think so. David seems upset.”

“He’ll get over it,” Stevie says, not worried. 

“Stevie, come on. Let’s go home. We need to talk about this. Patrick, are you gonna be okay?”

“Yeah, I just need a minute and then I’ll go talk to him.”

“Okay, text me if you need anything. I’m so sorry about this.”

Cassie leads Stevie out the door and then Patrick stumbles towards their bedroom. The door is locked. 

“David, open up! I want to talk to you.”

“No, go away!”

“Stevie and Cassie are gone. It’s just me. Please, I want to talk to you.”

David cracks the door open and Patrick’s stomach clenches as he sees his tear-stained face, red from obviously trying to hide the fact that he had been crying. 

“David, what’s wrong?” 

“It doesn’t matter. I’m just being stupid.”

“Hey! Don’t say that! That’s my husband you’re talking about,” Patrick says, trying to get David to smile, but it has the opposite effect. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have tried to joke with you while you’re upset. I’m kinda drunk.”

“Yeah, I can see that, shaky. Get in here and lie down. I’m gonna get you some water.”

Patrick does as he requests. David comes back in with a glass of water and some pain medication. He sets the medicine on the bedside table and scowls, but one of his playful ones where Patrick knows he’s going to tease him. 

“You’re not seriously gonna sleep in jeans, are you?”

“Well, you told me to lie down, I was just doing what you told me to. Plus, I have a feeling if I tried to get out of my clothes, I’d have just fallen over. I was feeling kinda dizzy.”

“Here, let me help you get into something more appropriate to wear to bed.”

“My hero,” Patrick mutters softly. 

David goes over to the dresser and grabs a t-shirt and a pair of blue pajama bottoms and helps Patrick get into them. It’s quiet for a while until Patrick says, “Don’t think I’ve forgotten that you were upset. Are you gonna tell me why? Or am I gonna have to tickle it out of you?” 

Patrick moves his hands towards David’s stomach and David says, “If you come any closer with those hands, there will be serious consequences! I don’t care if you’re drunk, I am _ not _ getting tickled.”

“So you’re pretty ticklish then, huh?” David doesn’t answer as he gets into bed beside Patrick, having helped him into his pajamas. “David, seriously, what’s wrong? Was Stevie’s teasing bothering you? Cassie’s gonna talk to her about that.”

David sighs. He doesn’t really want to tell Patrick anything, but even drunk the man is persistent as hell. He figures maybe he can tell him a partial truth and he’ll most likely forget about it the next day. 

“I just didn’t appreciate her bringing up Ted so much.”

“You really have a problem with him, don’t you?”

“I don’t have a _ problem _ with him, I just don’t know him!”

“I’m sorry, I know my reflexes are probably slow, but I’m still not understanding why this bothers you so much.”

“You were staring at him so much.” He doesn’t mean to say it, but it’s too late. The words escape his mouth.

“Yeah? So? He’s a handsome guy, but it’s nothing compared to how I feel about you. Lord knows how many times I’ve been caught staring at you for too long, hoping against hope that you feel the same way as I do.”

David gasps, audibly. He doesn’t know what to say. He doesn’t believe it. He _ can’t _believe it. Patrick’s drunk. He doesn’t know what he’s saying. 

Luckily, he doesn’t have to say anything in response because Patrick passes out. At least one of them will get some sleep tonight. 

***

“What is wrong with you?” Cassie demands of Stevie as soon as they’re in their apartment.

“What do you mean?” 

“You really upset David in there! With your constant teasing and pushing the Ted subject.”

“Well, he wouldn’t be so upset if he just admitted his feelings for Patrick!”

“It’s not our place to decide things for the both of them. You _ just _ got back on their good side, do you really want to fight again?”

This seems to sober Stevie up. 

“No, of course not. It’s just so frustrating, Cassie! They’re perfect for each other, that much is clear, but they’re so goddamn stupid!”

Cassie sighs. “I know they are, but we have to let them be. I’m not saying you can’t give a little nudge every once in a while, but what you did tonight went way beyond that.”

Stevie nods and then asks, “Take me to bed?”

Cassie grins and scoops her up, carrying her to their bed.

***

_ Déjà vu. _ That’s what Patrick is feeling as he wakes up, disoriented and unsure of where exactly he is. Obviously, he hadn’t had as much to drink as that night in Vegas, but it was enough to have him feeling pretty miserable.

He lets out a groan and sinks back into the bed, realizing too late that he probably just woke David up by doing so.

He chances a look and finds David deeply asleep beside him. This image makes him smile. He looks so peaceful, so content, asleep like that. He only wishes David could feel more like that when he’s awake.

Taking a chance, he scoots a little closer to David, letting the warmth emanating from him lull him back to sleep.

***

He awakens again to discover David looking at him. He blinks steadily, trying to clear the blur from his eyes.

“How are you feeling?” David asks hesitantly.

“Okay. I’ve been better, but I’ve also been worse. Of course, you know that.”

David only nods, minutely, and turns his glance away from him, saying, “Can I get you anything?”

“No, I’m fine. David, are you okay?”

David turns to look at him again and if Patrick hadn’t seen the look on his face when he first woke up, he’d have thought everything was perfectly alright. “Yes, I’m okay. Why?”

“I don’t know. You looked upset when I first woke up.” Now that he thinks about it, he remembers David being upset last night, but he’s pretty unclear about what. 

_ Damn my stupid face for being so vocal when I don’t want to be, _David thinks. What he says though is, “Well, as you know, I’m not really a morning person, so—”

Patrick looks at his phone, seeing that the time is a little past noon. He uses this opportunity to tease David, hoping it will cheer him up.

“Can it really be considered morning anymore, though? I mean, it is after noon now.”

David’s eyes light up and his signature half-smile dawns his face and Patrick feels victorious. 

“Okay, so maybe it’s not morning, but it still is too early for my taste.”

“Wait, isn’t it Tuesday? Shouldn’t you be at the gallery?”

“I called in to tell them my husband went a little too wild on a Monday night so I had to take care of him.” David smirks.

“Please tell me you did not actually say that.”

“No, I told them you were sick, but I can see the headlines now, can’t you? ‘David Rose’s Marriage on the Fritz? Husband’s Drinking Problem?’ ”

“Do you think I have a problem?” Patrick asks, nervously. _ Is this why David seemed upset? Was he judging him? _The anxious thoughts flooded his mind all at once. 

“No, no, nothing like that. It’s just that tabloids love to do stuff like that. They see people doing something as simple as having a couple drinks with some friends and they spin it so it comes off negatively.”

“Okay, so it doesn’t bother you? That you’ve seen me drunk now multiple times?”

“Patrick, where is this coming from? I’m the last person ever who can judge anyone on their drinking habits and it’s not like you do it every night or even that often. It’s completely okay that you had some drinks last night. I just didn’t feel like drinking.”

“Okay, I just got nervous that that’s why you were upset.”

“Patrick,” David rolls his eyes, playfully. “I told you I’m not upset. Are you still a little drunk?” He laughs, trying to play it off.

“No, I’m not. I don’t know, I just have this vague feeling that something was bothering you.”

“So you don’t remember much from last night then?”

“No, I don’t. Why? Should I?”

David’s heart breaks at that question. He knew it. He knew Patrick had only said that stuff because he was drunk and that he didn’t really mean it. It was his own fault that he let his hopes up the tiniest bit. Of course the sweetest man he had ever known would not want him for real. 

“No, nothing important happened.” David says, dismissively, then changes the subject. “Let’s get some carbs in you. We’ll have you feeling back to normal in no time.”

Patrick knows that he shouldn’t push the subject so he doesn’t. He still can’t shake the feeling that something happened, but he just doesn’t know what it was or even what it was about. He wracks his brain, desperately trying to make himself remember, but all he remembers are blurry Uno cards amidst a disastrously-gone wrong game night. But why had it gone wrong?

***

The next couple of weeks were crazy busy. David was pulled away to Spain to try to get an up-and-coming Spanish artist to display their works in his gallery. Patrick had been spending his time discussing business with Johnny and he even helped him out when he needed it. David and Patrick texted a little bit, but with the time difference and how busy they both were, for the most part, they hadn’t spoken to each other much. 

On the Thursday before Moira’s party, and the day before David is due back in town, Johnny invites Patrick to golf with him, an invitation Patrick readily accepts. 

On the golf course, Johnny says, “So, are you excited to see David again tomorrow? I’m sure this time apart was really difficult for you both, still being pretty newly married and all.”

“Uh, yeah, it’s been a bit weird not seeing him and having to sleep alone.” Patrick says before shutting his eyes and biting his lip, hoping that didn’t sound bad to his father-in-law. 

“Yeah, I get how that is. Any time I have to travel for business, it’s tough being away from Moira. Do you two have any plans for when he gets back?”

“Umm, I’m not sure. He’ll most likely be jet-lagged from the trip, but I could maybe cook him a nice meal once I pick him up from the airport.”

“Do you need to borrow a car?”

“Yes, actually, that would be great. Thank you.”

Johnny nods and then starts speaking again. “So, believe it or not, there’s a reason I asked you here today.”

“Oh? Not just because you enjoy my company?” Patrick asks, teasingly. 

If it had been David, he would’ve teased right back, but Johnny looked panic-stricken. “No, no, I didn’t mean it like that! Of course I enjoy your company, I just meant—”

“I know, Johnny, I was just messing with you. But anyway, go ahead. What were you saying?”

“Well, you’ve mentioned wanting to find a job and it doesn’t seem like you’ve had a whole lot of luck and well, you’ve been so helpful to me, I was wondering if you’d want to come work for me.”

Patrick freezes. He instantly remembers all the times David has expressed frustration with his father. He doesn’t know how David would feel about this at all. And he doesn’t want to do anything to jeopardize their relationship, if one could call it that. 

“Uh, well, I would have to talk it over with David.”

“Right, right, of course. Well, take your time. Discuss it with him, and if he’s on board, you could start right away.”

“I’ll probably wait until after Moira’s party to bring it up. He gets kind of cranky after long flights, and I also wouldn’t want to overwhelm him.”

“Right, right, he does get cranky,” Johnny says.

“I think it’s cute,” Patrick says. “But I will let you know once we’ve talked about it. Maybe early next week?”

“That sounds good.” 

They’re packing up their golf clubs and putting them back in their bags when Johnny pauses and looks up at Patrick. He clears his throat and plays with his hands in a way that makes it look like he’s nervous to say something. _ Ah, so that’s where David gets that particular quirk from. _

“Johnny? Are you okay?”

“Yes, Patrick. I just, I just wanted to say that I’m sorry for misjudging you. You seem to really care about my son which is a lot more than can be said from what I’ve heard about some of those other bozos he’s dated. And thank you for making him so happy. He’s happier than I think I’ve ever seen him when he’s with you.”

“Thank you, Johnny, for saying that. I love him, you know?” And Patrick finds that he does, he really, really does love David. 

“I know, son, that much is clear in everything you do for him. You’re a good man,” Johnny says, extending his hand for Patrick to shake. 

Patrick shakes his hand and says, “As much as you say I do for him, he’s done for me. He has made everything feel right and okay in my life and I’ll always be grateful for that.” 

Johnny claps his free hand on top of their joined ones and smiles at him. “You’re about the best son-in-law a man could ask for.”

“Aww, only ‘about’? What could I be doing better?”

Johnny starts to frown, but then, noticing the smile on Patrick’s face, says, “Ohhhh, you’re joking with me again, aren’t you?”

“That I am, Johnny! That I am.”

***

Patrick greets David with a kiss on the cheek and takes his bags from him. 

“How was the trip? Did you get the artist to sign with you?” 

“I did, yes,” David says with a tired smile. 

“I knew you could do it! I’m proud of you!”

“Thank you,” David says quietly. “Can we stop and get some food on the way home? I had food on the plane, but that was a while ago, and I’m hungry again.”

“I actually made a casserole as a kind of welcome home celebratory dinner if you can make it through long enough for it to cook.”

David’s eyes start to prick with tears and he scrunches up his mouth, hoping they will not show. He wants to say it’s because he’s so tired that he’s about to cry, but he knows it’s not. It’s this man. This beautiful, too-good man. _ Who will never want you _, his brain unhelpfully supplies and which enables him to clear his head and blink back the tears.

“You didn’t have to do that.” 

“I know, but I wanted to. I figured you’d be hungry and then tired, in that order,” Patrick laughs and David laughs along with him. “After dinner, you need to rest up for your mother’s party or she’ll have a fit.”

David groans, leaning his head back on the seat of the passenger side of the car. “Oh my god, that’s tomorrow, isn’t it? The timing of this is just very bad.”

“I know it is, but the good news is that aside from our expected presence there, we don’t have anywhere we need to be so you can sleep as much as you need. You can shut your eyes now, if you want. We still have a bit of a drive ahead of us.” 

David allows his heavy eyes to close and in what feels like five seconds, he feels a hand on his shoulder, gently shaking him. 

“David? We’re home.”

“Hmm? Already? It feels like I just shut my eyes!”

“Yeah, you were out cold, but come on, let me help you inside. I already took all your things in.”

The two head inside. David inhales the aroma of the casserole and his stomach grumbles. Patrick chuckles. 

“It’ll be ready in about half an hour if you want to lie on the couch for a bit.”

“No, I think I’ll try to stay awake until after dinner. It smells divine and will therefore be requiring my full attention.”

Patrick laughs and says, “I’ll have to tell my mother you said that. It’s her recipe.”

“Aww, how is she doing? Have you talked to your parents recently?”

“Yeah, I spoke to them while you were away. My mom was very disappointed you weren’t there. She wanted to talk to you about some style show she was watching? Uhh, ‘What to Wear,’ I think?”

“It’s _ What Not to Wear _, Patrick! And you should call your mom again sometime this week. It sounds like we have a lot to discuss.” 

“Okay, will do. How was Spain? Did you see anything cool?”

“I mostly spent my time with Lyn, learning the ins-and-outs of their process. It was fascinating. Oh! Speaking of Spain, I got you something!” David jumps up from the couch, going over to his bags, which Patrick had set on the floor near the front door, and digging around in one. 

“Where’d all this newfound energy come from?” Patrick asks. 

“The casserole has given me a reason to stay awake now! I am renewed!”

“Yeah, until you fall asleep mid-bite with your face falling into it.”

“Bite your tongue, Patrick Brewer! That would never happen!” He pauses, as if thinking about something. “On the off-chance that does happen, please catch me before I fall into the casserole. I’m sure the ingredients of the casserole are good for the stomach, but not for the face.” 

David approaches him with a medium-sized package, wrapped up in brown paper, with a bow made out of twine wrapped around the edges. “Here you go,” he says abashedly. 

David watches on nervously as Patrick carefully unwraps the package. As soon as he sees it, Patrick gasps, looking up at him. 

“How did you? This is beautiful, David! Thank you!” 

“This” is a painting of the two of them from when they went to the Broadway League softball game on their two-week tour of New York City. 

“I had the picture on my phone still and it’s one of my favorites and so I commissioned Lyn to have it done. I wanted to bring you back something from Spain, but I looked and looked and I just wasn’t seeing anything that I thought was _ you _ so I hope this is okay.”

“Okay? David, this is wonderful! Thank you so much!” 

Patrick stands, placing the painting down carefully on his chair, and opens his arms to hug David. David hugs back and they stand there, hugging each other for what is probably seconds too long, before they are interrupted by the timer going off. 

“I, uh, should get that.”

“Yes, yes you’d better.” 

Patrick laughs as he steps away into the kitchen locating the pot holders and taking the casserole out of the oven. 

***

David and Patrick sit on the couch for a bit after dinner, which David had practically inhaled, until Patrick notices David’s eyes starting to droop. 

“Okay, come on, let’s get you to bed. We’ve got a big party to go to tomorrow night.”

David whines, but stands up and walks with Patrick to their bedroom. 

“Oh no,” David says.

“What’s wrong?”

“I left all my night time stuff downstairs.”

“I put it in the bathroom earlier.”

“Patrick Brewer, you are the actual sweetest human alive.”

Patrick blushes and goes to change while David does his nightly skincare routine and brushes his teeth. He emerges earlier than usual and he says, “I give up. My skin is probably already effed from the flight, so I should be more worried about it, but I’m just too tired to care.”

He slides into bed and Patrick has barely turned off the lights and joined him before David is fast asleep. 

***

Patrick wakes up to a phone call. Answering it quickly to avoid waking up David, he slips out of his room and then says, “Hello?”

“Hey, so this party tonight, it’s gonna be super fancy, right?”

“Yeah, I would imagine so. Stevie, why are you calling me so early? You’re never up this early.”

“I realized that I have nothing that constitutes fancy to wear and so I’m freaking out a bit. What are you wearing?”

“Umm, a tux? David picked it out for me so I don’t really know specifics.”

“Oh, you had David pick out your outfit? Why didn’t I think of that?”

“He picked it out weeks ago, before he went on his trip. He only just got back yesterday, remember?”

“Well, is he around? Can I talk to him?”

“...Stevie, you, of all people should know that he’s not up right now. And please don’t bother him. He’s exhausted and jet lagged and I need him to be well-rested or else this party is going to be disastrous.”

“Dang it.”

“Have you tried to ask Alexis? I’m sure she’d have something for you to wear. Or Cassie?”

“Cassie’s in the same boat as me. I mean, we have our dresses from your wedding party, but it’s seen as super taboo to wear the same outfit twice, even if it’s different events. And I don’t want to stand out. I want to be as blended in as possible so no one talks to me, or even looks in my direction.”

“Hmm, so yeah, maybe going to Alexis isn’t the best idea.”

“Well, it’s still a start! I don’t know why I didn’t think to go to her! I just instantly thought ‘oh, Patrick’s capable and smart, he’ll know what to do’!”

“Well, I’m flattered, Stevie. Good luck!”

“Thanks. See you later!”

“Yeah, see you!”

Patrick picks up the book he has been wanting to read for a while now and starts in on it. When lunch time rolls around, he stops, puts a bookmark in to save his space, and makes himself a sandwich. He wonders if he should make one for David too, but he figures he can do that whenever David actually wakes up. 

A couple hours later, he’s almost finished with the book, when David emerges, looking adorable, hair all messed up from sleep. He yawns and stretches and Patrick shuts his book and puts it off to the side. “Well, hey, sleepyhead!”

David glares at him. “What time is it?”

“It’s two-fifteen.”

“What? I slept for so long! I have to start getting ready immediately!”

“David, woah, what’s the rush? The party doesn’t start until seven, right?”

“Yes, but knowing my mother and my father, they’re going to start doing cocktails around five-thirty for the early arrivers and I, rather, _ we _ will be expected to be in attendance. And there most likely will be cameras everywhere, capturing everything, and all of this,” he says gesturing to himself, “doesn’t just come about naturally. It takes time and oh my god why am I spending time explaining this to you when I should have started already?”

Patrick shakes his head and calls after him, “David, do you need something to eat? I could make you some food if you’re hungry.”

David pops his head back out around the corner and says, “Yes, I would like that very much, thank you.”

Patrick makes him a sandwich and calls out to him. “David, it’s ready whenever you are.”

David comes back out, his face shiny from some product or another, and eats the sandwich hurriedly, and then goes back into the bathroom. Patrick worries that he’ll get a stomach ache from eating that fast, but then again, it isn’t the first time David has eaten food quickly, and it’s never seemed to be a problem before. 

Patrick spends the rest of the time before he gets ready to go finishing up his book and then he puts on his tux and has David messing with his bowtie, trying to make sure it looks absolutely perfect. 

Once he is satisfied, the two of them head to Moira and Johnny’s penthouse apartment and knock on the door. Johnny opens it and says, “Boys, come in! You both look wonderful! Moira wants us to get some family photos all together before the official festivities begin. She hired a professional. Some big name or other, I forget, but anyway, come on in!”

David and Patrick head into the apartment, towards the cameras, and Patrick bumps into David, who freezes, inhaling sharply. Patrick looks at his face and he seems frightened. Patrick follows his gaze to the photographer: a skinny man with casually unkempt hair, wearing a ragged-looking sweater, who is smirking at David.

“David, do you know him? What’s going on?”

“That’s Sebastien,” David murmurs, not able to look away, and Patrick feels his blood pressure rising. Looking right at Sebastien, he wraps his arms around David and whispers, “Do you need me to cover for you? Fake an illness?”

“No, it’s okay. I can handle this. Besides, my mother would throw a tantrum and we don’t want that.”

“I’ll be right here beside you the whole time, okay? Just say the word and we can leave, your mother’s reactions be damned.”

David smiles at him and the two of them walk hand-in-hand towards the rest of the family.

Moira squeals delightedly, looking them over. “Don’t you two just look marvelous! Like the two brighest stars dancing the tango together in perfect harmony. We’re gonna get some family pictures taken, and then couple photos. Sebastien, where do you want them?”

Sebastien mutters something unintelligible, but likely degrading, and Moira says, “You’re going to have to enunciate, Sebastien! Not all of us have hawk-like hearing!”

Sebastien arranges the family and then Moira re-arranges them. He takes multiple shots and rolls his eyes when Alexis declares they should do “funny poses,” but does it anyway since Moira’s paying him a small fortune to take photos.

Finally, he declares it is time to do couple photos. He has Johnny and Moira go first, saying it is because he knows they have other stuff they “need to attend to.” Then, Ted and Alexis. And then, lastly, David and Patrick.

Patrick turns to David and whispers, so Sebastien can’t hear, “I have an idea. Do you trust me?”

David nods, and the minute Sebastien tells them to pose, Patrick puts his hands on David’s face, pulls him in closer to him, and then kisses him passionately. David gasps at first, but then kisses him back. He needs to pull away, everything inside him is screaming that this is a terrible idea and that this will only make things harder on him, but he decides he doesn’t care. He’s wanted to do this for so long, ever since the last time they had kissed, but with the way that whole scenario had ended, the two of them decided they should kiss only when necessary. 

If someone were to ask Patrick, it’s necessary. 

Finally, they pull apart, needing air, and Moira asks, “Did you get a photo of that, Sebastien? It would make quite an exquisite portrait in their living room!”

Sebastien huffs, and glares at them, and then turns away saying, “I need a moment.”

Moira and Johnny both look confused and Ted and Alexis are nowhere to be found. 

Johnny says, “What’s his deal? We need to get these done before the guests arrive!”

Patrick ignores this and looks right at Moira, asking, “Were you aware you hired your son’s ex-boyfriend as your photographer?”

“Sebastien Raine? No! He’s never dated David.”

“Yes, I have! For three months! Four if you include the month he was seeing other people,” David shoots back. 

“Well, I’m sorry, David. I wasn’t aware of this. Maybe in the future, you could give me a list of all your past trysts so this type of situation can be avoided.”

David growls and also storms off, and when Patrick tries to follow him, he says, “Don’t follow me. I need to be alone for a while.”

He locks himself into the bathroom and back to the door, slides down it, sitting with his knees pulled into his chest. He has to try to regain some composure, has to try to get his thoughts in order, but there’s so many of them and it’s all so overwhelming. 

Why had Patrick done that? Why had he kissed him? More importantly, why hadn’t he just pulled away the second he realized what he was doing? What is going on with him? Doesn’t Patrick see what he’s doing? Being so nice, and so kind, and so affectionate; making him love him? Wait...love him? Does he love him him? Is this what love feels like? He’s never been with anybody long enough to know. And he still really hasn’t. And now he had to go and fuck everything up by falling in love with a man who is not his real husband, and never will be. Great, David. Way to go. 

This spiraling leads to a panic attack which leaves him shaking and exhausted. He gets up off the floor and goes to the sink, splashing cold water on his face. He needs to get out of here. He can’t be here. Not near Patrick. Not near anyone. 

He emerges from the bathroom to find a concerned-looking Patrick. And he feels angry. 

“I told you not to follow me!” he nearly shouts. 

“I’m sorry, David. I was just worried about you. Wait, where are you going?” he says as he sees David heading for the door. 

“I need to go home. I can’t be here. I can’t be around all of this.”

“Let me take you home. I can—”

“No, Patrick. It’s right downstairs! Regardless of what you may think, I _ can _ do things for myself!”

“David, I—”

“Save it. I’m getting out of here. Have fun at the party,” he says, opening the door and then slamming it behind him, leaving Patrick speechless. 

He’s only standing there for a moment before Cassie comes up to him, Stevie beside her, and says, “Patrick, hey! Where did David go? Is he okay?”

“I...I think I fucked up.”

“What?” Cassie takes a look around and then says, “Here, come with us. We found a good hiding spot. We can get settled there before it starts to get really crowded in here.”

Cassie, Stevie, and Patrick head to Moira and Johnny’s bedroom closet and all sit on the floor inside of it, shutting the doors.

“Not to ruin the seriousness of this situation, but there’s definitely a joke to be made here,” says Stevie, gesturing around. 

Patrick flashes a half-smile, acknowledging her comment, but then his face immediately becomes serious again. 

“So, what happened?” Cassie asks, placing her hand on his knee as a comforting gesture. 

“I kissed him and he stormed off.”

“Okay, there’s got to be more to it than that,” Stevie says, deadpan. 

“His ex was here as the photographer. I don’t know why they hired his stupid fucking shitty ex in the first place, but that’s neither here nor there. Anyway, he was leering and smirking at David and so when it got to the time to take our picture, I kissed him. And I thought he was kissing back! But then he seemed angry and stormed off. I just don’t know what to do!”

Stevie gets a determined look in her eye and goes, “That’s it! You two stay here, I’m going to go talk to him!”

“Stevie, no, he said he wants to be alone.”

“He doesn’t know _ what _he wants, clearly.”

She walks away and Cassie says, “I’m sorry, Patrick.”

“Yeah, me too,” he says somberly. 

***

Stevie gets to David and Patrick’s apartment and pounds on the door. 

“Go away, Patrick! God, do you _ ever _ listen?”

“Well, I’m not Patrick, but to answer your question, no, I don’t.”

David opens the door, his face is red from crying. 

“What do you want, Stevie? If my mother sent you, tell her I’m violently ill. That will get her to leave you and me alone.”

“I think a more important question is what do _ you _ want, David?”

“What? What do you mean?”

“AARGH! You both are incredibly dumb, wait here!”

Stevie runs back upstairs to the penthouse apartment, into Moira and Johnny’s closet, and grabs Patrick by the hand, hoisting him up. 

“What? What are you doing?”

“Come with me!”

“Okay, I will, if you stop yanking my arm near out of its socket, ouch!”

Stevie, still holding onto Patrick’s hand, but gentler, leads Patrick to his and David’s apartment, Cassie following closely behind. 

She gets up to the door where a still-stunned David is standing, and grabs one of his hands in her free hand, and then she leads them both to their couch.

“Sit. Talk to each other. You know, that thing where you open your mouth and express your true intentions and desires and shit? We’ll be back at the party if you need us.”

Cassie and Stevie leave and David and Patrick sit there, staring at each other in astonished silence. They both open their mouths to speak, but Patrick lets David go first. 

“I think we need to end this. I think we need to get divorced. You shouldn’t have to be stuck with me anymore. I’m only a burden on you and it’s not fair for you to be tied down to me when I’m nothing more than damaged goods.” 

As he says this, David stands up and starts pacing, unable to look Patrick in the eyes because if he looks him in the eyes, he’ll tell his true feelings, and he’d rather they end up on slightly good terms than Patrick hating him forever and being revolted at the idea of him loving him. 

Patrick stands up too, approaching him cautiously. He puts his hands on his shoulders, stopping him in his tracks, and then uses one hand to tilt David’s head down so they’re looking into each other’s eyes. 

“If that’s what you really want, then I’ll respect your wishes, David. I’ll go. But can I at least say what I’ve been dying to say for a long time now?”

David merely nods. 

“You aren’t a burden on me. You never were. All this time I’ve spent with you? It’s the happiest I’ve ever been. You made that happen, David! You! And I don’t know where you got the idea that you are damaged goods, but I don’t think that of you! I would never! I could never! I love you, David Rose, and maybe that’s not what you want to hear, but it’s the truth.”

David looks at him, confusion, and a whole other blend of emotions on his face. “Wait a minute, did you just say you _ love _ me?”

“Yes, I did, and it’s true, but I understand that you don’t feel the same way. I just would’ve hated myself forever if I’d left here without having said that.I’ll go now.” 

Patrick turns to leave and David yells, “Wait!”

Patrick turns back around and is met with David kissing him. David throws his arms around his neck, pulling him closer, closer, but still not close enough. Patrick wraps his arm around David’s waist, and the two of them just keep kissing, and kissing, and kissing, tears streaming down their faces. 

They pull away and David looks at him, as Patrick brushes the tears from his eyes. “I love you too. I just..thought you could never feel that way about me. Nobody ever has before.” He lets out a laugh and Patrick’s face asks an unspoken question. 

“Stevie was right. We really are dumb.”

Patrick smiles and then pulls David in for another kiss. The two of them make their way over to the couch, kissing all the while, until Patrick pulls away, and says, “We should talk.”

David’s breath hitches and Patrick jumps in, “Let me amend that phrasing. I have some things I would like to discuss with you, husband-to-husband.”

“Oh yeah? And what are these things, husband of mine?”

“Well, first of all, I would just like to say that regarding all those people who made you think nobody could ever love you, they’re missing out on a wonderful, amazing person. And I know you said someday you would tell me all about your history, but you don’t ever have to, if you don’t want to.”

“Thank you, Patrick, but I think it needs to be something we discuss. Maybe not right now, considering we have a lot of time of us being idiots to make up for, but we will talk about it. And maybe not all at once either, but we have that luxury now. I’ll just casually go about my days with my husband, casually peppering in ex stories.” 

Patrick laughs and says, “I think I can work with that.”

They lean in for another kiss and then David says, “So you said you had things to discuss with me, plural. What else?”

“Your dad offered me a job while you were out of town, but I told him I needed to discuss it with you before accepting. Would you be okay with that? If not, I can find something else.”

“Is this job something you _ want _ to do? Would you be happy doing it?”

“Yes, it is, and yes, I think so.”

“Well then, I think you should accept his offer.” 

“Okay then, I’ll tell him tomorrow.”

“Now, was there anything else? Or can I go back to kissing you?”

“Hmm,” Patrick thinks. “We should talk about how you feel about every word in the dictionary.”

“Jerk,” David says, playfully pushing his shoulder.

“It’s a hot topic right now, David!”

“We could be a hot topic, if you’d just let us!”

“Okay, you won me over,” says Patrick, as they resume kissing.

***

“It’s awfully quiet in there,” says Stevie, hours later, with her ear to the door. “Do you think everything’s okay between them or did they kill each other?” Stevie wiggles the door handle and says, “It’s not locked, should I go in?”

“Stevie, don’t. Just give them some privacy. We can talk to them tomorrow.”

“I’m just gonna take a peek.”

“Okay, well don’t get mad at me if you see something you didn’t want to.”

Stevie pops her head in and the speed at which she pulls her head back out has Cassie saying, “What did I tell you?”

“No, Cassie, it’s not that. You’ve gotta see this! And I’ve gotta photograph this! Can I use your phone? Mine died.”

“Yeah, I guess, but what are you seein, awwww,” says Cassie as she takes a look at what Stevie was referring to. David and Patrick are curled up together on the couch, fast asleep, Patrick’s head on David’s shoulder. 

Cassie hands Stevie her phone and Stevie starts snapping picture after picture. Finally, after what is no doubt a few hundred photos, Cassie reaches for her phone and says, “Okay, Stevie, enough. Let’s let them sleep. Come on.”

The two of them turn the light off and lock the door behind them before heading off to their own apartment down the hall. 

***

A knock on the door startles Patrick awake. He instantly regrets not making the two of them move to the bed based on the pain in his neck and back. He makes a mental note to ask David if they can find a couch that still maintains the “aesthetic of the apartment,” but is also functional and not exceedingly uncomfortable. 

He opens the door to discover Johnny on the other side, looking concerned. 

“Good morning, Johnny. Is something wrong?”

“I came here to ask you the same question. You two left rather early yesterday.”

Patrick instantly feels guilty. “I’m so sorry, Johnny. David and I had a bit of a fight yesterday, but luckily, we worked everything out.”

“Good, good, I was worried when I didn’t see you two.”

“Yeah, we’re all good now. Oh! And I talked to David about your job offer and I would love to work for you, if you’ll still have me.”

“Oh, yes! I’d love that! I’ll have you start Monday, if that’s okay.”

“Yes, that works for me!”

“That wasn’t what you two were fighting about, was it?”

“No, it was completely unrelated. David seems very on-board with this whole thing.” 

“Great, I’m glad to hear it. Well, I’ll leave you two alone now, I just wanted to check in.”

“Thank you, Johnny. We appreciate it.”

Johnny leaves and Patrick closes the door as he hears David yawn and ask sleepily, “Who was that?”

“Your dad. He was checking in because we left so early last night.”

“Was he mad?”

“No, he just seemed concerned, but I told him everything was good now.”

David smiles, remembering the events of last night and nods vigorously. “Yes, everything is definitely good! Great, even!”

“Wow, great? What ever would warrant that reaction?” He grins as he walks over to give David a kiss, loving the fact that he can just _ do _that now.

“Mmm, you tell me,” David says in between kisses. “Good morning!” 

“Shouldn’t that be ‘great morning?’ ”

“Don’t push it,” David quips, unable to hide his smile.

“So, what’s the plan for today?”

“Well, I was going to call my mother because as I recall, _ somebody _ wanted to talk to her about _ What Not to Wear _.”

David cannot recall a time when he smiled as much as he already has today. And he wouldn’t change anything about any of the more negative times because they all led him to the incredible man he gets to call his husband.

He goes off to the bathroom to get ready for the day and calls over his shoulder, “I suppose you can have the time I spend getting ready to talk to your mother.”

Patrick giggles, elatedly, and no matter how much he tries to stop smiling, he can’t because he’s so goddamn happy. 

He pulls out his phone and dials her number. She picks up after the first ring. 

“Patrick! It’s so good to hear from you! How is everything?”

“Everything is magnificent, Mom. No, better than that!”

“Oh really? Do I get to hear about what makes it better than magnificent? That’s very high praise for only 10:30am on a Sunday morning.”

“I told David I love him last night and he told me he loves me too. We’re staying married! I couldn’t be happier if I tried.” 

“Oh, my sweet boy! I’m so glad you finally told him how you feel, and I’m very happy for you that everything worked out for you two. I had a feeling it would. Call it a mother’s intuition.” 

“How are you and Dad?”

“We are well, everything’s pretty much the same here.”

Patrick and Marcy chat for a while until David comes out of the bathroom and then Patrick says, “Mom, if it’s okay, I think David wanted to discuss _ What Not to Wear _with you since you didn’t get to talk the other day.”

“Of course it’s okay! I’d love to talk to your husband!”

Patrick hands over the phone to David and sits back down on the couch. He tries to pay attention to David’s end of the conversation, but quickly loses focus, instead he’s captivated by David, watching him wave his arm around as he talks excitedly to Marcy. 

Pretty soon, David hands the phone back to him saying, “She said she has to run errands now, but she wanted to talk to you again quickly.”

“Hi, Mom.”

“Hi, Patrick. I just wanted to say that your husband is truly a delight and a keeper and I’m so happy that you’re happy.”

“Thank you, Mom. I love you.”

“I love you too, Patrick. Talk to you later!”

“Yeah, definitely!”

He hangs up and David comes up excitedly. “Your mother is great! She told me she wants to visit New York again soon and she asked me if we could pretend we were on the show and I could give her some fashion advice, and I, of course, told her that we absolutely could do that if that’s what she wants.” 

Patrick smiles a wide smile at him and David asks, “What?”

“I just love you so much.”

David looks down at the floor, blushing, and says, “I love you.” They lean in for a kiss and David says, “I will never get over the fact that we can just do that whenever we want now.”

“Me neither.”

It’s a very lazy Sunday, but David and Patrick wouldn’t have it any other way. They mostly spend the day lounging around, lazily making out, and occasionally dozing off. Patrick brings up the topic of getting a new couch and David replies with “we’ll see” which is more promising than a definitive “no”. 

***

The next morning, the alarm goes off, and Patrick turns it off, and gets out of bed while David groans, and makes grabby hands for him. 

“Uh uh, if you want a kiss, you have to get up and come get me.”

“You’re mean. Mornings are mean. Who invented them? Terrible invention!”

“Come on, David, you’ve got to get to the gallery, and I’ve got to go meet your dad upstairs. We’re carpooling.”

“Oh that’s right. It’s your first day working for my dad. Good luck, you will most likely need it.”

“What a warm and loving send-off. I feel so blessed.”

“You are blessed. I mean, look at me. I’m a treat.”

“You are, David,” Patrick says so sincerely that he thinks he may cry. Sure, he knows now that Patrick actually means what he says, but even with that knowledge, he’s not sure he’ll ever get used to it. 

“Come on, now, your stall tactics have worked long enough. Time to get up.”

David pouts. “But those weren’t even stall tactics! I was just making conversation! Please, please let me try my actual stall tactics out on you!”

“Some other time perhaps,” Patrick whispers, his face super close to David’s, as if leaning in to kiss him, but then when David leans forward, he pulls back. 

“Ruuuuude!”

“And you’re going to be laaaate,” Patrick replies in an equally sing-songy tone. 

“Stay for a bit,” David whines. “I’ll make it worth your while!” he says, waggling his eyebrows.

“David, it’s my first day working for your _ father _. I’m not going to be late! The sooner you get up and out of bed and face your day, the sooner it’ll be time to come home and spend time with your wonderful husband.”

“Hmm, wonderful husband? Yeah, I don’t have one of those. I do have a pesky tease of a husband though.”

“Eh. Same difference. I’ll make your lunch for you and I’ll put in on the counter.”

“I take it all back. You _ are _ wonderful.”

Patrick watches as David gets out of bed and goes into the bathroom. He goes into the kitchen to make breakfast and pack lunches while David does his routine, and then he figures they’ll switch places, David eating breakfast while he does his own, way more simple, morning routine. 

Once this is done, they both head their separate ways, kissing each other on their way out. 

***

The first couple of days working for Johnny go really well for Patrick. He’s looking forward to what this Wednesday will bring him because Johnny had mentioned that Wednesday is the day he will get to look at the books, putting him truly in his element. 

He walks in to Johnny’s office and greets him. Johnny says, “Good morning, Patrick. Let’s start with Rose Video books, and then maybe later, we can look over David’s gallery.”

“Oh, you do the books for David’s gallery? That’s nice of you.”

“Uh, well, not exactly.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, we keep track of how much we’ve paid patrons in that one.”

Patrick stares blankly at him. “You mean, how much patrons have paid you, right?”

“No, no, we pay the patrons to purchase the art,” Johnny says, as if what he just casually said wouldn’t turn his son’s whole world upside down. Patrick doesn’t know what to think, he just stands there frozen, listening to Johnny continue, “David has always wanted to own a gallery, but would never listen to me whenever I would tell him there’s no money in art. What was I _ supposed _ to do? Watch him fail?”

If there were any other person at all, Patrick would’ve argued with them, yelled at them for not believing in their child, and he still wanted to do that, but he has to remember this is his father-in-law and he doesn’t want to make a scene or cause a fight. 

Johnny trails off and looks at Patrick, who appears pale and hasn’t said anything in a while. 

“Patrick, son, are you okay? You look really pale. Maybe you should go home and we can try this again when you’re feeling better.”

Patrick doesn’t argue, just nods, and turns back around, returning to his and David’s apartment. 

David is, of course, at his gallery when Patrick gets home, and Patrick dreads the conversation he knows he needs to have with David. It isn’t a hard decision to make, David needs to know this information, but it is going to be hard to tell him. To look at the face of the man he loves and tell him such devastating news. 

He spends the afternoon going back and forth between pacing anxiously and sitting down on the couch, attempting to calm himself down. Evidently, he tires himself out because the next thing he’s aware of is someone shaking him awake. He doesn’t remember nodding off, but he does remember what he has to tell him as soon as he sees that face. David’s going to be heartbroken. 

“What are you doing here? I would’ve thought you’d be all wrapped up in numbers today. Are you ill, do you need anything?” David asks, concern and care emanating from him.

“Can you sit beside me,” Patrick asks softly.

“Of course. Patrick, honey, you’re starting to worry me.”

“Can I kiss you?”

“Only if this is a greeting kiss and not some ‘I’m gonna leave your sorry ass, but I wanted to give you one last kiss farewell’ kiss.”

“No, it’s nothing like that,” he says, leaning in to kiss him, but David stops him. “But there is something wrong?” he asks, sounding stressed and tense. 

“Yes, but not with us,” Patrick says as he pats the seat on the couch beside him. “There’s something I need to tell you about your gallery.”

“My gallery? What is it?”

Patrick sighs. He knows that he is doing the right thing, but that doesn’t make it any easier to do. 

“Your dad told me today that he keeps a book for your gallery—”

“Well, yeah, Patrick, but that shouldn’t shock you. I wouldn’t know the first thing about doing that.”

“That’s not the shocking part of this, David, just let me finish. Anyway, when I asked about him doing your books for you, he told me that that’s not what that one in particular was for. He said that that one was for what he paid the patrons.”

David looks at him confusedly. “Patrick, do you mean what the patrons pay me? Are you that tired?”

“David, I wish I was. I wish I could say that it was just a misspeak.”

David sits there, quietly, calmly, just thinking. “So, umm, what does that mean?”

Patrick closes his eyes and murmurs, “Please don’t make me say it.”

David just nods, slowly at first, but then he jumps up, out of his seat, grabs his coat, and storms out before Patrick could even stand up.

Patrick opens the door and looks down the hallway and sees the elevator already closing.

_ How is he that fast? _

Patrick follows him, but instead of waiting on the elevator, he just takes the stairs, running down them as fast as he can. He reaches the lobby of the apartment building and looks around frantically. He doesn’t see David anywhere.

“Damn it,” he murmurs, and then he rushes back up the stairs to his apartment. On the way, he runs into Johnny, who is just getting home. 

“Have you seen David?” he asks.

“No, it seems more likely that you’d have seen him more recently than I have. Say, your face is really red, do we need to get you some medical attention? My son is pretty inept at that kind of thing, but I can get you a doctor.”

Patrick held his tongue earlier, but now, angry thoughts just come pouring out of him. “Your son is perfectly capable of taking care of me, in fact, he did just that when I had a migraine several weeks ago! He took care of me and made sure I was comfortable, and even pulled the curtains closed so it would be darker! Just because you have some skewed viewpoint of your son’s abilities, doesn’t mean he can’t do things! And I’m not ill, I’m just out of breath from chasing after David when he ran away just now.”

“Ran away? Why would he run away?” Patrick rolls his eyes at the complete disregardance for anything he said about David before that last line and says, “Gee, I wonder why. Could it be because he found out his own father doesn’t believe in him?”

“Is this about what I told you about the books? You weren’t supposed to _ tell _ him that! I thought of the two of you, you were the one I could trust! You’ve got to understand, it’s not personal! It’s just business! And David has very expensive tastes in, well, everything! I wanted to make sure he could afford what he wants!”

“But by doing that you’ve shown him you don’t trust him! That you don’t believe in him! His whole life he’s needed someone to believe in him and because he couldn’t get that from his own family, he sought it elsewhere, but never found it, to the point where he thinks of himself as ‘damaged goods’ and that’s on _ you! _But I believe in him and I love him and he deserved to know! But now he’s gone! How are you gonna make this right?”

“How am _ I _gonna make this right? What about you? You caused this!”

Patrick scowls and huffs, walking away. He’s put up enough of a fight for one day. Right now, he just needs to find David. 

He calls Stevie and asks if she’s heard from David. He explains that he can’t get into it right now, but David ran away and he needs to find him. Both she and Cassie tell him that they have not heard from him, but that they can come help find him. Patrick is so grateful they do not ask what is going on because he doesn’t have the energy or willpower to explain. 

Stevie and Cassie meet him in the lobby and hug and comfort him, saying, “We’re going to find him, Patrick. Don’t worry.”

Cassie says, “We could split up, look for him in some of his favorite places?”

Patrick is about to agree to that before he remembers what David told him about the tree in Central Park. David mentioned on the two week tour that if he ever felt sad and alone that he would go there to think! He’s gotta be there!

“No, I think I just figured out where he is, but thank you both! I’ll talk to you later,” he calls back to them as he heads in that direction. 

It takes a while to get there, but when he does, sure enough, he finds David, face all red, and greatly upset. 

“David!” he calls out, relieved.

David only looks up at him, before bowing his head again.

“Please come home, David. I was so worried about you.”

“I can’t go back there, Patrick! I’m a fraud, a phony. My whole professional career has been a lie! I’ll be the laughingstock of New York. Who am I kidding? I already am.”

Patrick sits beside him and wraps an arm around his shoulder, placing a kiss to his cheek. “Now’s your chance to show the world you don’t back down! Now’s your time to show the world what you can do!”

“But I don’t _ know _ what to do, Patrick!”

“It’s okay, you don’t have to know right now, but whatever it is, I’ll help you figure it out, okay?” 

“I love you, Patrick Brewer.”

“And I love you, David Rose.”

***

_ Epilogue: Three Months Later _

Needless to say, Patrick doesn’t end up working for Johnny after he tells David the truth. It’s not even for Johnny’s lack of trying; Patrick just decides that he needs to stand firm with David.

David asks Patrick if he’s okay with moving to a different apartment, Patrick says he’s okay with doing anything that makes David feel comfortable in this whole situation.

One day, while packing, Patrick comes across an open package he had stowed away in his drawer. Curious, and unsure of what it is, he takes a look inside it and gasps. _ The other three rings I bought so long ago for David! I should give these to him! _ But then, before he does that, he gets a better idea.

“David?” he calls out.

“In the kitchen, wrapping up our dishes!” he replies back.

“I just had an idea I wanted to run by you. You know I love you and that we are already married, but I can’t help but be sad that we don’t actually remember much about our wedding. What if we had sort of a vow renewal? That way, we get a wedding experience we actually remember, and our friends and family get to witness it. What do you think?”

David stops what he’s doing and smiles. “You mean it? Like a big wedding ceremony and everything?”

“Yes! And we could invite my parents and, uh, your parents, if that’s okay with you.”

David hesitates. He and his parents haven’t spoken a whole lot since he found out about them buying all of his patrons. He chews on his lip, thinking, and then says, “I suppose that would be fine. They’d probably want to see that.”

***

Everybody is super on board with the vow renewal idea. Johnny’s a little confused, stating that it “seems a little soon for a vow renewal”, but still seems pleased to be invited.

David is very excited at the prospect of decorating their new apartment that is in an apartment building completely unrelated to the Roses, thank you very much, and so the fact that he gets to plan a wedding now too serves as a good way to cheer him up and distract him from his sadness about his family.

Patrick is surprised and pleased at how quickly everything seems to come together for this wedding. The only hiccup is when he suggests the idea of Stevie and Cassie also renewing their vows.

“We’re good with our drunken wedding,” Stevie says. 

“Yeah, did you hear that,Patrick? They’re good! Besides, we don’t need anyone upstaging us on our big day.”

“You mean you don’t need anyone upstaging _ you,” _Stevie retorts. 

“Okay? So what if I do? It’s not like I remember my first wedding, no thanks to you!”

“Hey, I only married you two! I didn’t force all the alcohol down your throat! You did that all on your own so that you could flirt with your now-husband so this is just as much your fault as it is mine!”

The two bickered back and forth like that for several minutes and Cassie and Patrick just sat together, shaking their hands, and chuckling, clinking their glasses together, and watching their spouses lovingly. 

***

The day of their vow renewal ceremony arrives and, since they had already had a big party to celebrate their marriage, Patrick insists that it be more intimate with only very close friends and family in attendance, and _ certainly _no press. 

They stood in front of everyone and read their vows to each other, vows that they had eagerly written and were considering their real vows since neither of them remembered any of the what-was-probably-nonsense they had uttered at their Vegas wedding. 

Patrick speaks first, looking David in the eyes, his face shiny with tears.“Every decision I’ve ever made. Every step I’ve ever taken. All of it was leading me to you. I’ve never been more sure of anything in my entire life. You mean so much to me, David. And I love you more than I could ever possibly describe. My life always felt incomplete, like it could be really great, but there was something wanting. You’re the missing piece, and now, together, we can build our lives, the right way.”

Then, it’s David’s turn. “I never thought love was something I would ever get in my life. It’s not like I didn’t try, as everyone here probably knows, I tried, and tried, and tried," he laughs awkwardly, trying to disguise it as a cough. "But here we are today, in front of our families, and friends, renewing our vows, and strengthening that connection we had that was already so profound. You did it, Patrick. You managed to outrank food on my list of priorities, which is _ not _ an easy feat.” Patrick giggles.“I love you and I'm excited to see where this journey of life takes us.”

They kiss and everyone cheers. Stevie even wolf whistles which David rolls his eyes at. 

At the reception, Johnny pulls David aside and the two have a heart-to-heart. David explains why he’s upset and tells his dad he needs to do stuff on his own from now on. Johnny tells him he respects that and that he’s proud of him, and pats him on the back. No, David _ absolutely _ did not cry, no matter who will say otherwise.

Johnny even gets David to agree to having another family dinner soon which is the start of them building an actual relationship with each other. 

A little later, Stevie pulls David and Patrick aside. 

“Stevie? What’s this?” Patrick asks confusedly as Stevie hands him a medium-sized package which he immediately hands to David, knowing he'd probably want to open it. 

Stevie stares at him blankly. “It’s a wedding gift, Patrick. I didn’t think I had to explain this to _ you _.”

“Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I’m not grateful, it just caught me off guard.”

David opens it and stares at it, unsure what exactly he is looking at. Patrick leans in and looks at it as well and says what David is thinking, "Umm, what exactly is it that we are looking at here?”

“Remember that note Cassie showed you on that first morning you were married? Well, I spent a while studying it, and I think I figured out what I was actually saying finally. It may not be an exact match, but it was the best I could do. I thought that you guys would want your original wedding speech, even if you couldn’t remember it.”

The package contains a canvas with calligraphy print on it. It reads: 

**Dearly beloved, we’re gather fucking. Fucking gathering. Whatever. I can marry people because I’m gay and that gives me the power to marry gay people, and they’re in love probably so we’re married. Marrying. We’re at a wedding. Babe, you’re hot. We should get married too. This is Dav and Pasty’s wedding. Hey, what kind of name is Pasty. Are you a dessert, or is it because your skin is so pale? They said I’m a vampire but maybe you’re a vampire. [laughs] You’re Edward Cullen. Do you sparkle? Is it because you’re gay. Okayyyy, can we get this over with so we can go fuck? Because I wanna fuck you and I’m pretty sure they wanna fuck too. That’s what you do when you get married, did you know that? Let’s all fuck. You and me. And them. Sepa—sep—separately. This is a really great idea. I’m glad they decided to get married finally.**

Patrick looks up with tears in his eyes and laughs. David even not-so-subtly wipes a tear from his eye. “This is so great, Stevie, thank you.”

“I like how it matches the aesthetic of our apartment,” David says.

“It’s like you think I don’t know you at all, David. I’m hurt that you think I’d give you something you’d be horrified by.”

“We can hang it up in our bedroom, that way we won’t have to dodge a whole bunch of questions of what it is or what it means.”

“So, you’re still not telling anyone that your original marriage was a drunken one?”

Patrick looks down at the ground, guiltily. 

“Or have you, Patrick?”

“My parents may have known for the bulk of the time.”

Stevie looks delighted and David, affronted. “Wait, what? You told them?”

“Yes, I’m sorry I never told you. I just, I needed them to know this was real to me, even if I drunkenly married you.”

David seems appeased with this answer and then his expression turns mischievous. “So, wait, you’ve wanted to be with me since _ way _ back then?”

“David, I’ve wanted to be with you since I first woke up that morning, even if it was only subconscious back then.”

Stevie makes a gagging noise, but looks secretly thrilled at this admission, and David throws his arms around Patrick’s neck and kisses him. 

***

Alexis and Ted had been dating ever since Moira’s party and so, of course, they had gone to the vow renewal with each other. As the night goes on, Ted gets progressively drunker. 

At one point during the night, Ted goes up to David, Alexis on his arm, and declares in what he thinks is a stage-whisper but is actually very loud, “David! I think Patrick has a crush on youuuuuuu!”

Alexis rolls her eyes. “Babe, they’re literally married. We’re _ at _their vow renewal reception.”

Ted grins wildly and exclaims, “Whoa!!! I did it! I’m a matchmaker!!!”

David laughs and Alexis drags Ted away saying, “Okaaaaaay, I think it’s time to get you to bed.”

***

Cassie finishes her nursing courses and gets a job as a nurse at a local hospital. And Stevie decides she’s really great at this whole matchmaking thing and decides to marry as many drunk duos as she can find-nah, just kidding, could you imagine? Stevie goes on to open a tiny bookstore/cafe where people can just chill and play solitaire all day long which is what she wants to be doing. 

After David closes his gallery—no longer wanting to be associated with the one his parents tainted—he realizes he wants to try again, on his own this time; well, with the help of his husband, who definitely knows a thing or two about business. 

Ultimately, David decides maybe he doesn’t hate Vegas so much after all. He doesn’t think he’ll be visiting again for a long, long time, but he feels he cannot hate the city that brought him to the love of his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: Stevie's drunken note is really put through a speech-to-text thing, courtesy of Emma.
> 
> Come find us on tumblr @gaysteviebudd and @steviebuddisalesbian!


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